Caption contest

Written By: - Date published: 2:52 pm, August 2nd, 2013 - 77 comments
Categories: caption contest - Tags:

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77 comments on “Caption contest ”

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  1. unclemuzza 1
    2 August 2013 at 2:54 pm

    Hey kids! hands up if you have mum and dad investors as parents?

  2. Michael Nolan 2
    2 August 2013 at 2:56 pm

    George Bush on the morning of 9/11

  3. Zorr 3
    2 August 2013 at 3:03 pm

    “Hands up if you want to know what your teacher was Googling last night?”

  4. vto 4
    2 August 2013 at 3:06 pm

    “ha ha, no your Mum is wrong, I’m not a liar” *blush*

  5. vto 5
    2 August 2013 at 3:09 pm

    “oh….. *blush*……. as red as dotcom said you reckon ?”

  6. chrissy 6
    2 August 2013 at 3:09 pm

    “What was the question again young man? You’re using too many big words, and complete sentences. I can’t understand the question”

  7. Jackal 7
    2 August 2013 at 3:16 pm

    Key: Yes! The little subversive in the back?

    Where are the Kiwi terrorists trained by Al-Qaeda and could you show me the WMB please Mr President?

    Key: Look over there at this lovely polling kiddies…would you like to play another game to see who will resign next? I like ice cream.

  8. alwyn 8
    2 August 2013 at 3:23 pm

    Well goodness me it’s young Hipkins. The truancy officer caught up with you at last.

  9. tc 9
    2 August 2013 at 3:26 pm

    Whaddya mean why aren’t I at question time see you are asking me questions so THIS IS question time.

    OK next question yes thanks you whose father enjoys blogging under the handle ‘Tyranny4All’

  10. Treetop 10
    2 August 2013 at 3:33 pm

    Can I get away with telling bullshit?

    You know how honest children can be.

  11. weka 11
    2 August 2013 at 4:01 pm

    gawd, it’s good to be back with my peers again.

  12. fabregas4 12
    2 August 2013 at 4:16 pm

    You only have half a teacher now because all the money is in private and charter schools.

  13. fabregas4 13
    2 August 2013 at 4:17 pm

    Yes we only really want centre-right teachers – for too long it was the left that dominated education.

  14. sweetd 14
    2 August 2013 at 4:18 pm

    …and by the time you kids are old enough to vote I will still be PM.

  15. marty mars 15
    2 August 2013 at 4:22 pm

    Yeah, I used to be prime minster but i got caught lying too much so now I’m just Mr Key your new history teacher, so lets get into it – who can tell me the capital of wellington?

  16. fabregas4 16
    2 August 2013 at 4:22 pm

    I’m laughing because I don’t really give a rats arse about any of you – you’re not my kids.

  17. fabregas4 17
    2 August 2013 at 4:25 pm

    Yes Mrs Parata is the Minister of Education but she is so bloody useless that we don’t let her anywhere near schools.

  18. Papa Tuanuku 18
    2 August 2013 at 4:37 pm

    And when you grow up, you can be an Australian too.

  19. chris73 19
    2 August 2013 at 4:37 pm

    No I don’t know why I’m so popular but its a good thing

  20. King Kong 20
    2 August 2013 at 4:43 pm

    Kids, Did you know that there are a bunch of sad losers on the Standard who just can’t stop thinking about me.

    • Mary 20.1
      2 August 2013 at 5:02 pm

      But of course I never read what they say.

      • Mary 20.1.1
        2 August 2013 at 5:04 pm

        Then how do you know they’re sad losers who can’t stop thinking about you?

        • Mary 20.1.1.1
          2 August 2013 at 5:08 pm

          I honestly can’t remember.

        • Private baldric 20.1.1.2
          2 August 2013 at 5:19 pm

          Greg Presland is one of the authors… guilt by association don’t you know.

          [lprent: Baldric, baldric… Yes I remember, should be dead. Will shortly be a silent zombie unless there is a change in behaviour.

          If I see you start that crap again then you will be permanently banned. I am a whole lot less tolerant about silly games towards authors.

          Are you quite clear on that? ]

    • Murray Olsen 20.2
      2 August 2013 at 9:43 pm

      Yes, the sad losers worship me. The monkey one even names his fleas after me. The others are subversives.

  21. rod 21
    2 August 2013 at 4:50 pm

    Mr Key, can we play I Spy, my mum says you are an expert at it.

  22. BLiP 22
    2 August 2013 at 4:55 pm

    ‘

    Hello underclass. Hands up whose mummy or daddy has a job . . .

  23. chris73 23
    2 August 2013 at 4:56 pm

    Yes thats right kids there is a good chance that you’ll have left school before Labour are back in power

  24. Old Ted 24
    2 August 2013 at 5:39 pm

    Please put your hand up if you think your dad is a terrorist.

  25. jaymam 25
    2 August 2013 at 6:01 pm

    Hey kids! Wanna see this centrefold of Vance?

  26. Postie 26
    2 August 2013 at 7:07 pm

    He-He-He my mates will be making $10k each out of you little focker soon He-He-he

  27. Blue 27
    2 August 2013 at 7:08 pm

    PM: Hands up who knows who David Shearer is?

  28. Blue 28
    2 August 2013 at 7:10 pm

    PM explains what polls are. Now all those voting Labour put your hands up.

  29. peterlepaysan 29
    2 August 2013 at 7:31 pm

    You all know how to play “I Spy with my little eye?”

    Let me show you my way of playing that game.

    It is called “protecting John’s back”.

  30. rob 30
    2 August 2013 at 7:44 pm

    That’s an interesting question
    Yes, how did I get to be worth $50M and yet my company
    still managed to go tits up?

  31. mac1 31
    2 August 2013 at 8:18 pm

    “Your teacher introduced me as the eponymous reader of this book. Hands up if you know whatever that means.”

  32. georgecom 32
    2 August 2013 at 8:41 pm

    Now kids, shall we read some more of Peter Dunnes emails?

  33. Arfamo 33
    2 August 2013 at 10:07 pm

    Yes I know sometimes I use the wrong words on tv but that doesn’t mean I’m an ignorotamus.

  34. georgecom 34
    2 August 2013 at 10:49 pm

    Yes kids, if you do work hard at school ou may get a job in my personal spy agency.

  35. Akldnut 35
    2 August 2013 at 10:49 pm

    This is the smile I use when I know the commoners don’t believe my lies, it works a real treat.

    I taught the rest of my party how to do it, just keep an eye out for Hekia, Paula, Simon Bridges or Nick Smith when they’re talking bullshit to the media or screwing the underclass.

  36. georgecom 36
    2 August 2013 at 10:50 pm

    Yes kids, if you do work hard at school you may get a job in my personal spy agency.

  37. BrucetheMoose 37
    2 August 2013 at 10:58 pm

    “…the end. Well, I’m glad you liked my story telling kids, I get plenty of practice as Prime Minister.”

  38. woodpecker 38
    2 August 2013 at 11:00 pm

    The PM just sat there……wondering who fucked him? Who was it that leaked? Later that evening a lone private jet left AKL with a small hunched man and a group of heavy set men ( wearing sunglasses) on a one way flight to Hawaii ………………….fin.

  39. Jackal 39
    2 August 2013 at 11:45 pm

    By the time you reach intermediate kiddies, under a National government well all be $208 billion in debt. Anybody got a spare kidney to sell?

  40. the pigman 40
    2 August 2013 at 11:47 pm

    “Can anyone tell me who stuck this enlarged version of Labour’s 1999 pledge card under the white board?”

  41. Jackal 41
    2 August 2013 at 11:57 pm

    That’s the end of our economic slavery lesson for today kids. Now lets sing the National anthem: Oh, say! can you see by the dawn’s early light…

  42. phillip ure 42
    3 August 2013 at 7:04 am

    key:..’do you kids know..that by the time you grow up…the state will know absolutely everything about you..?..’

    phillip ure..

  43. phillip ure 43
    3 August 2013 at 7:11 am

    keys’ stunned-mullet reactions to the news (whispered in his ear) that david cunnliffe has just replaced david shearer as leader of labour..

    ..(heard to mutter under his breath:..’oh shit..!’..he then pretends nothing is wrong/has happened..

    ..and goes on to read the storybook to the school-children..

    ..and just ignores the baying-media at the schoolhouse door….)

    phillip ure..

  44. phillip ure 44
    3 August 2013 at 7:12 am

    key:..’how many of you kids are in the permanent-underclass..?’

    phillip ure..

  45. phillip ure 45
    3 August 2013 at 7:14 am

    key:..”..do you kids know that i am doing all i can to make sure you grow up to live in a third world/low-wage/surveillance-state..?..”

    phillip ure..

  46. phillip ure 46
    3 August 2013 at 7:17 am

    key:..’why am i smiling and laughing/so happy..?

    ..i am just thinking how expendable you all are..

    ..you are all just the children of pissant-peasants..

    ..and you will all grow up to be pissant-peasants..

    ..if i get my way..

    ..they don’t call me the smiling-assasin for nothing..eh..?’

    phillip ure..

  47. phillip ure 47
    3 August 2013 at 7:24 am

    key:..’i grew up in a state house too..

    ..just like the ones i am throwing your families out of…’

    phillip ure..

  48. phillip ure 48
    3 August 2013 at 7:25 am

    key:..’boo..!..i’m the chief-spook..!’.

    ..scary..eh..?..’

    phillip ure..

  49. phillip ure 49
    3 August 2013 at 7:29 am

    key:.’have you kids heard what i have been doing to the new zealand economy and environment..?

    ..no..?..that’s good..!’..

    phillip ure..

  50. ruup 50
    3 August 2013 at 10:48 am

    Ewww, was that you?

  51. phillip ure 51
    4 August 2013 at 12:15 pm

    key:

    “i’m rich..and you’re not..haha!..”

    phillip ure..

  52. phillip ure 52
    4 August 2013 at 12:18 pm

    key:

    “..hello kids..ackshully i’m here to present you all with the invoices for your futures..”

    phillip ure..

  53. Maggie May 53
    5 August 2013 at 8:16 am

    See, not all dictators are scary

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