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notices and features - Date published:
3:45 pm, September 1st, 2015 - 90 comments
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https://player.vimeo.com/api/player.jsShe chooses poems for composers and performers including William Ricketts and Brooke Singer. We film Ricketts reflecting on Mansfield’s poem, A Sunset on a ...
https://player.vimeo.com/api/player.jsKatherine Mansfield left New Zealand when she was 19 years old and died at the age of 34.In her short life she became our most famous short story writer, acquiring an international reputation for her stories, poetry, letters, journals and reviews. Biographies on Mansfield have been translated into 51 ...
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The flag design John Key really preferred …
‘PM shows off his hourly rate’
“PM shows off his per minute rate.”
FIFY
Rock-star shawl. Help yourself guys, there’s plenty more where this comes from!
‘John Key finally discloses just how much of his parliamentary salary he donates to charity each month’
John key thoroughly ducked.
PM thought he was untouchable in brazen counterfeiting scheme.
“I’ve got ten million of these!”
At least the $10 notes look much better than that horrible cheesy grin.
Government saves economy and endangered duck my massive print of almost real plastic ducks.
my new curtains…looking for matching carpet.
(Through gritted teeth) “Some fucker just mentioned Norway. Take em out back…”
http://www.geek.com/news/norways-beautiful-new-pixelated-banknotes-are-more-than-meets-the-eye-1606520/
Sorry Kate, I can’t quite reach the head, but will a quick shit on the shoulder do?
?
Took me a while too, Check out the background.
Kate Sheppard and a blue duck are behind Key.
John thinks he’s worth 25 Kates
Still don’t get it.
The duck is looking at Kate, they’ve been having a conversation, and the duck says it can’t reach Key’s head to shit on it, but it can reach his shoulder. It’s just the visuals of the duck and its bum and the way it’s facing, it’s a classic blue duck stance I think, and I liked to think that that the duck and Kate would both be of a like mind about appropriate political behaviour towards Key…. oh never mind.
Thanks Weka I thought it was you that found his shoulder too high???
PM unveils new strategy for achieving that elusive surplus.
PM grits his teeth as he holds the money the common people use.
Fake holds up counterfeits
Room full of counterfeits, one of which is human.
Look I will have to stop looking I am pissing myself with all the wit we have tonight.
Thank fuck the kiwi humour is coming through even if this pack of shit as a government is doing it’s best to fuck the place.
Room full of counterfeits, one of which looks human. fify
Alternatively: ‘Spot the fake’
Yep, much sharper.
This is how much money the country’s got left
That is shit hot pal. Made me laugh, and lets face face it, we need a fucking laugh the way the fucking spiv is selling this once great country down the river.
Look we have got a surplus.
Hey dv that also made me laugh First class pal and I do like you sense of humour.
Thankx HC
My real love, money, money, money. In a rich mans world.
key holds up the latest book he has just finished reading
Prime Minister gradually becoming more visible to the public due to hollowed out currency.
“….and this is my picture.”
Now you see it soon its gone
PM displays his new toilet paper.
everyone and everything can be bought
…including a nation’s flag
…and the nation itself
“Kim John Key”, “Leader on the Shining Path to the Eternal Brighter Future” proclaims, these are the intermediate, transitional new bank notes for you people. I have just handed in the draft proposals for MY new bank notes, to be printed in time during mid 2017. They will bear my handsome features, so you will all remember me, for eternity.
New voting papers will be introduced also, by Elections NZ, bearing two options, aye or naye, and it will be my face next to the positive box to tick, and one other box with no name, for those so determinedly negative spoilers, who are always against me and MY “enlightened” government.
This will be the new effective election system at play, streamlined, for delivering results, using the “leaner” and “better” public service approach, that we brought in.
All Hail the beloved leader…Next thing he will be wanting a new flag.
John just couldn’t hide his pleasure as he presented the first agenda item at Sky City’s AGM.
Kate bites evil man’s head
It’s ok, there’s plenty more – They’re off my tree in the back yard
“I too am just treading water”
johns contribution to the new flag.. if only it had a fern
PM: If I had a dollar for every time I’ve lied to the media, this is how much I woulda made in August
PM: If I had a dollar for every time the media’s let me get away with those bare-faced lies, this is how much I woulda made in August
PM: if I had a dollar for every time I’ve let Mike Hosking slobber all over me, rubbing his wet, shiny nose against my cheek as I pat him on the head and stroke his fur while he excitedly wags his tail, this is how much I woulda made in August
lol
John Keys showed off his attempt at the new craze of adult coloring in books!
Keys, insists…noooooo it’s a Real Banksy!!!!
NZ Antiques Roadshow……..Keys……tries to get the bidding above $3………..come on these are real $10..u fucks………who will raise their offer to $3.50???
P.M DISGUISES PUBLIC ERECTION WITH GUARANTEED DISTRACTION.
You may call this printing money and giving it to the banks & corps..I prefer to call it Quantative Easing……
Yes,,,,I will show you..this is what i was paid for a night out with Judith,Paula and the girls.
I was offered Magic beans or this amount of Cash from The Chinese Gvt for the whole of the south island….You would be proud of me..I turned down the beans! that’s why i was a Banker and you lot aren’t.
You wait till next week..when I show off the $1,000,000 notes!
Bargain!!!! I Just sold my soul for this amount suckers!
Take one last look, guys, we’re just about to bring in the cashless society.
Keys shows off WINZs new food stamps for 100 families
Keys, shows any one that will look and listen…his new postage stamp collection
keys is presented with his new personalized bullet proof vest
Keys demonstrates……new household solar panel..for rich people only
Hey..who said i couldn’t multi task…..look a evil smile and using my fingers at same time..
In your face critics!!!!
I compromised!!!!!!……..My face is just all over the reverse!
Right come on cabinet…its gonna take more than this for the hair transplant……..dig deeper!
Hey, fuckwits, look what i won at the sky city casino!
“Wow, this is what I got for the whole of New Zealand – pity it’s only funny money!”
If you work really hardyou can earn one of these cleaning the toilets in Parliament
and it only cost ya 89 million and a bit of change to print that.
suckers
The Prime Minister finally takes Colonial Viper’s advice (and just prints money)
Leading by ducksample.
It’s facilitation NOT compensation.
Key: “Look, no ponytails!”
And while you blind sheep out there are discussing the flag and the new pretty security tracking capable money we will be printing to prop up the economy in election year, parliament is in recess this week because…..
Money makes the world go round that clinking clanking sound.
–Kander/Ebb
Key: “Yup, well aktchually I just wanted to show the Security Council that we’ve got a pretty big sheet of $10 notes so we can definitely contribute to the refugee crisis in Europe”.
“They’re Telfon-coated, just like me.”
One blue polly behind a money wall
One blue polly hanging with McCaw
And if this blue polly should accidently fall
Thanks to Crosby/Textor spin he’ll soon be standing tall.
The Prime Minister shows off the wanted poster of the next native species the under funded DOC is going to hire hunters to accidentally go shoot instead the ducks they are meant to hunt.
Looks like a duck, quacks like a duck. WTF.
Loose change
Nu Zilland is sold..
this is what i got for it
We were going to use them as sheets, but we’re going to wait for the 100s
Me, MY All Blacks and MY silver fern will be on the new $100 notes
Is this enough to buy the emperor his new clothes?
Key combines his two obsessions: Derp face selfies and money.
John Key to media pack
“Just relax, breath deeply and gaze at this picture for a minute or two and miraculously, you’ll spot the smiling face of God hovering above it.”
my new wallpaper has finally arrived. oh joy.