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#twyfordaccusations

Written By: - Date published: 12:53 pm, May 26th, 2018 - 52 comments
Categories: humour, Judith Collins, labour, making shit up, Media, national, phil twyford, same old national, the praiseworthy and the pitiful, twitter, you couldn't make this shit up - Tags:

Judith Collins, National’s best performing politician, has dropped another bombshell about Phil Twyford.  She has alleged that on the same day he took a call in a plane when the doors were closed he stood up out of his seat as the plane was taxiing.

He can’t recall it and does not accept it happened.  But the trepid informer who told Collins about the telephone incident clearly thinks he or she has more dirt on Twyford.

When I heard this I was a rocked to my core and let out an uncontrollable “Meh“.

And I wondered why Collins thought this was such an issue that she would try and hog the media light two days in a row by drip feeding the details.

And what was coming next.

Twitter obliged when someone created the #twyfordaccusations hashtag.  People had fun guessing what was going to be alleged next.  Here are some of the better ones.

Feel free to post in comments your thoughts on what other nefarious allegations will be made against Phil Twyford.

52 comments on “#twyfordaccusations”

  1. adam 1

    Twyford overreaches again, but then again he is prone to it.

    It comes when you actually make an effort, rather than sit on your arse being smug.

  2. JustMe 2

    What is it about the NZ National Party and its MPs that it MUST resort to such childish tit-for-tat hearsay behaviour???!!!!
    Collins obviously was not on that flight but took whatever someone said as absolute Gospel.
    Where was her voice of concern when Gerry Brownlee breached airport security some years ago and pushed(or rather bullied)his way onto a flight by claiming he was ‘running late for a plane’?
    It never ceases to amaze me that the National MPs have so quickly forgotten their all too numerous indiscretions over the years but are so eager to jump onto the accusation band wagon based upon ‘hearsay’.
    Way to go National. You obviously still remain a bunch of schoolyard bullies throwing temper tantrums and hissy fits when it suits you but you will never ever stare into the mirror and accept the fact you have done many wrong things over your political life-times!
    You antics to date are of course a direct reflection back upon the NZ National Party itself. And so lets hope you lose the Northcote electorate because you absolutely do not deserve respect let alone admiration.

    • Louis 2.1

      many many +1’s

    • patricia bremner 2.2

      JustMe, You have that so right!! I was mumbling suitable replies, then read yours and went, “Yes!! Asobloodylutely!!

    • tc 2.3

      It’s as much about a media with agendas rather than focusing on core issues which effect everyday kiwis.

      But that means explaining how we got here via the wrecking job Nact undertook over 3 terms so they indulge in this type of crap in the hope the sheeple forget how we got here.

      A good strategy that’s worked a treat btw as we don’t have public service broadcasting holding anyone to task.

  3. Kat 3

    It wasn’t actually Twyford in reality being himself as a human on the plane it was a hologram of Twyford and now the opposition are calling for an investigation into ministers fraudulently receiving flight allowances.

    And Brownlee is asking The Speaker to deduct ten supplementary questions from the coalition govt and give the opposition twenty two more.

    Crikey, is it going to be a long nine years for the Nat opposition or what.

    • Kate Lang 3.1

      It will a better 9 years if Labour ousts the Nats from Northcote. Support and vote for Shanan Halbert at the byelection. Increase the majority.

  4. Ad 4

    Twyford would do well to emulate the kind of gall and political skin that Collins has displayed in her intersection of private, public, and commercial lives. These current scrapes are very minor.

    Twyford is going to be cutting deals via his housing agencies and via his transport agency that will be unusual in their risks, very bold in their scale, and go further in their integration of public policy goals and private profit than we have seen under Labour since the Lange government.

    There will be mistakes. They will be costly and damaging.
    These are the prices that he is going to pay to get his scale of transformation done.

    I’m sure he’s generating the necessary skin.

  5. Heather Tanguay 5

    The real battle is between Collins and Bennett, they know Simon is not cutting it. They are both using e very trick in the book to draw attention to themselves.
    PHIL Twyford is doing great work, you know that is why these 2 miserable show
    Ponies are trying to discredit him.

  6. Sacha 6

    This just Judy virtue-signalling to the factionalised Nat caucus.

  7. Akldnut 7

    And now the guns are pointed at someone else since Jacinda and Clarke are bullet proof.

    If the futility of petty political attacks is realised there would be silence from the opposition benches, but I’m not sure the arrogance and entitled attitude they have will allow common sense to prevail.

    Expect a lot more of these in the near future because it’s the only way they can make themselves relevant.

    • NZJester 7.1

      National have been shooting off scattergun shots in all sorts of directions with wild accusations trying to hit something. Some of it has been spraying back in their own faces.

  8. Craig H 8

    Left the tray table up #Twyfordaccusations

  9. Ovid 9

    I heard he took two hard-boiled lollies from the bowl.

  10. Sabine 10

    so I guess that the National Party still has no friends and still has no plans nor ideas to get back into the driver seat.

    Poor National, alone at home with Judith Collins and Paula Bennett. 🙂

    • NZJester 10.1

      They have a plan to open the driver’s door from the back seat, push Labour out the door and jump in the seat before it goes varying off the road into a ditch.
      Unfortunately, the problem they do not realize is it is already in that ditch where they drove it before Labour kicked them out and at the moment Labour, NZ First, and the Greens are struggling to pull it back out of that ditch onto the road.
      The main other problem is their huge egos mean they will have trouble getting into the front seat to drive as every National member is plotting to make themselves the driver.

  11. bwaghorn 11

    Twyford was actually pulling the hostesses hair while on the ph to an upset Arab promising him a slab of swamp kauri shaped like a dining table. So my 3rd cousins plumbers missus reckoned

  12. Matthew Whitehead 12

    Seriously though, even if he did do this, the story as described is not an unreasonable thing: seat belt lights mean you are supposed to secure your belongings as well as staying seated, and coats can get everywhere even when you hold onto them. Stowing it overhead would have been safer than holding it, even though the light was already on.

    (ofc if he was really smart he’d loosen his belt slightly so he could sit on his coat until the light went off)

  13. Robert Guyton 13

    This is your captain speaking: Passenger Twyford, you will put your clothes back on and resume your seat immediately!#Twyfordaccusations

  14. Robert Guyton 14

    Twyford admits to saying, “stupid little girl” #Twyfordaccusations

  15. Hanswurst 15

    We have reason to believe that Hon. Phil Twyford exposed himself to the aeroplane toilet behind closed doors.

    • fender 15.1

      Apparently the bowl-cam witnessed him holding his “sensitive wee sausage”.

      Meanwhile an inspection of his luggage found him to be in possession of an “ugly jacket”.

  16. Chris T 16

    The problem with Twyford is he comes across as smarmy and in people’s faces.

    He is one of those people who has never heard of a personal space in interviews with other politicians, especially women

    It is slightly creepy

    • patricia bremner 16.1

      Chris T You have been on here before with your accusations, but no supporting facts.That statement of yours is absolute garbage. He is the opposite of that!!
      An earnest considerate man. Of course to some being nice is a sin.

      • The Fairy Godmother 16.1.1

        Plus 111. He is a nice, kind and considerate person. He genuinely cares and wants to help people. All in all a good person.

      • Chris T 16.1.2

        Try every time he is on Garners show

        It isn’t like I’m the only person pointing it out

    • Drowsy M. Kram 16.2

      The smarmy and slick aren’t in short supply.

      “People do write some terrible things about Bridges. That he’s smarmy is one.”

      http://www.thecivilian.co.nz/oil-from-simon-bridges-hair-causes-horrific-spill-in-oriental-bay/

      “One witness, who wished to be identified by name but really shouldn’t be so greedy, said he or she saw a young woman request to touch Bridges’ wet mop.

      Bridges told her no, and recoiled when she repeatedly attempted to anyway.

      The witness believes she got a hand to Bridges’ hair on numerous occasions, potentially with enough force to have caused a rupture.”

    • Ffloyd 16.3

      What on earth are you talking about?. Your unsubstantiated allegation in itself sounds slightly creepy. You need to provide some proven instances to give your accusation any credence.

    • mary_a 16.4

      You are confused there Chris T (16). It’s slime personified John Key you are thinking of, not Phil Twyford.

    • AsleepWhileWalking 16.5

      I wouldn’t say so. He always seems respectful + quietly spoken considering his occupation.

  17. Incognito 17

    We can all be grateful that Judith Collins as the Leader of the Opposition is doing everything in her power to hold the Government accountable.

  18. AB 18

    Collins seems very at home in having a network of informers. Interesting – malice and authoritarianism runs deep in that one.

  19. Hooch 19

    Twyford left his reading light on when everyone was trying to sleep

    Twyford queued to get on the plane when they called for passengers sitting in the back rows, despite sitting up the front

    Twyford went to the planes toilet in his socks

    Twyford stuck his feet in the gap between the window and the seat in front

  20. Philg 20

    And Judith Collins, et al, has a hot line to the mainstream media presstitutes, who revel in it, and pat themselves on the back. How about some real journalism for a change.

    • tc 20.1

      Ha ha ha ha ha…..real journalism, sadly the kidettes think this is real journalism because they get paid and their spin gets published

  21. ADHDave 21

    Next up, “Twyford refuses to name informant who ratted on him, because he was embarrassed that he thought the informant could be trusted, in spite of wearing a National Party blazer and a t-shirt with a Judith For Leader logo…”

    It’s interesting that no-one has commented on the thing that ISN’T being spoken about – how come the “informant” on the plane, whose identity is being tightly guarded, who is obviously a paragon of Air Safety Personified, waited until AFTER THE FLIGHT WAS OVER to alert not the authorities or the Police, but JUDITH COLLINS?! (the ASP that bit him, as it were…)

    Sure, Twyford did actually break the rules, and when confronted, he admitted as much, and received a quite serious punishment with a loss of Portfolio responsibility, none of that is in doubt.

    So if Air Safety REALLY WAS the National Party’s prime concern, and not tawdry political point scoring, why didn’t their informant ASP speak up and challenge Twyford when it happened, and say “Oi mate turn yer bloody phone off” and then later “Oi sit down mate, the bloody seatbelt light is on”?

    Or if not keen on personal confrontation, why didn’t the ASP attract the attention of a Cabin Crew member, to tell Twyford off instead?

    No, the ASP bit his or her own lip to stop drooling with pleasure at the political mayhem they would cause, and happily flew the entire flight (that must surely have then been critically compromised and unsafe because of Twford’s selfish, evil actions – yeah right) without saying anything!

    None of the frothing mainstream media presenters seem interested in doing any journalism, such as interviewing this informer – who on the face of it, would seem to be just another of Judith Collins’ Dirty Politics smear team, more interested in trying to destroy a Coalition Government Minister than to highlight a safety issue.

    DIRTY POLITICS 3.0 – Collins has unwittingly outed herself as still being the ringmaster. Bridges and Bennett are far too lazy and unfocused to manage such sustained long-game smear attack tactics. They’d better watch their backs!

  22. tsmithfield 22

    The point of all this is that it is well known what the rules are for cell phone usage, remaining seated etc. It is reinforced verbally every time a plane is about to take off. So, there is absolutely no excuse.

    So, while the offence/s itself/themselves may seem trivial, it suggests that Twyford considers himself above the rules that everyone else is expected to comply with.

    If this incident is a symptom of a general attitude that Twyford holds, then is he fit for his position?

    • One Anonymous Bloke 22.1

      You’re projecting.

    • AB 22.2

      If it was habitual, as it is with Collins, you might have a case.

    • dv 22.3

      Reply to TSmithfield

      well known what the rules are for cell phone usage.

      From the airnz rules

      https://www.airnewzealand.co.nz/electronic-equipment

      Cellular or wifi transmitting capability must be switched off or set to flight mode for the entire flight.

      Entire flight?

      In the air
      Taking off
      Taxiing
      Sitting on the tarmac.

      Which are parts of the entire flight?

      The ‘rules’ on the airnz site don’t mention doors closing.

      • tsmithfield 22.3.1

        Clearly you have not flown much. If you had, you would know that instructions are given to turn of phones and do up seatbelts while the plane is on the tarmac.

  23. Errol 23

    You totally miss the point JM

    Despite Twyford’s offence being minor;

    1. He was the most vocal and extravagant complainant when Brownlie also breached the same regulations some time ago. Had he not offered to resign, he would have had to endure a National Party campaign focusing on his hypocrisy. He closed that down, which is good politics.

    2. He was the minister in charge of aviation regulations. He would have lost all credibility had he not offered to resign. This would have flowed across into his other portfolio’s and undermined his overall authority.

    It’s his own doing. Collins simply bought it to the county’s attention.

  24. Pete 24

    Were those instructions given on that particular flight before Twyford did the deed?

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