The last five days

Written By: - Date published: 5:53 pm, September 25th, 2014 - 63 comments
Categories: election 2014, labour, Satire - Tags:

A train is travelling through a nasty thunderstorm. It’s an express train; it’s late at night, and it’s travelling fast. The bad weather unnerves the driver. He’s had several close calls already. He squints through the small window in the cab, at the curve ahead ahead. He’s travelling too fast, he can’t recover. The brakes scream on – but it’s too late. The train derails, slides off the tracks, and crumples instantly into a heap of twisted metal, slammed up against the embankment.

Rescue workers make their way to the accident site. The paramedics arrive first, then the firefighters and the police officers. It’s major news – the TV news crews all arrive quickly. Newspapers. Bloggers.

An odd thing starts to happen. Instead of helping the survivors and securing the scene, the rescue crew start fighting amongst themselves. How did the crash happen? Was it was the driver’s fault? What was the main cause of the accident?

By now, there’s a decent sized crowd looking on. But it gets worse – no one can agree. The paramedics, the firefighters, and the police – not one of them seems to be in charge of the recovery. They’re still bickering about what happened. Worse still, some of the emergency services have decided to tweet their frustrations.

In the few remaining carriages the survivors are wet, sick, and cold. It’s still raining, and they’re injured – some severely. Their rescuers keep arguing about where to start.

The paramedics are convinced that it’s important to shift the blame to the driver before they start the rescue. But the driver has suffered major trauma – he’s incoherent and struggling to remember what happened. If they could reach him, they might see that while he will survive, it’s obvious that he will never be able to drive trains again.

train crashA few of the quieter rescuers are huddled together – they want to assess the damage and focus on recovery. They’ve trained for this. They don’t want to run into the wreck and pull out whoever they see just in case they get hurt themselves. But they’re worried if they don’t cooperate, there’s a growing risk it will get much worse.

The journalists start asking questions – are the rescue crews having trouble cooperating because they’re all from different services? Some of the senior officers have been around for a long time – is this why they’re not cooperating? By the time the survivors are pulled out, it’s clear that some will not make it.

It’s morning now, the day after the crash. There’s no shortage of work to do. Some of the train carriages are salvageable, but it will require a massive recovery effort.

The whole community will need to pitch in to clean this up.

 

Sophia

63 comments on “The last five days ”

  1. Chooky 1

    sounds like caucus fighting to blame and get rid of Cunliffe…after a bad Labour crash…

    • SHG 1.1

      PLUS ONE INSIGHTFUL

    • tricledrown 1.2

      Cunliffe is not the problem!
      A growing economy
      Dot Con Fucked up allowing the whole left to be blamed including the hager book>
      Key sacking Collins looked good!
      terrorist raids across the ditch helped Keys Spying excuses!
      National party Ads were very good and painted labour and the left as incompetent which stuck because of of Dotcom,s dumbarse political naivity!
      Then the right wing media had all the running!
      labour has to go back to pressing the flesh at ground level!
      Working with the greens on the same wavelength and policy so National can’t divide and conquer!
      On the positive side the Internet Mana Party has disappeared giving one less stick that the right can attack labour with!
      labour have to stick with Cunliffe like they did with Helen Clark!
      No more self destructing!
      Cunliffe performed very credibly and his popularity continued to grow during the elections !
      Robertson is to much of a politician Shearer can’t match it with Key Adern is to fresh!

      • Naki man 1.2.1

        I agree with 99% of your comment
        ” Dotcom,s dumbarse political naivity!”
        Quite funny really Dotcon spent $millions trying to remove National
        from government and helped them to a landslide victory.

  2. karol 2

    But who was the driver? Was the driver actually in control, or were some of his staff trying to tell him how he should be driving.

    how do you know the driver will never be able to drive trains again, if the emergency services have not been able to get to him and do a full diagnosis of his injuries?

    • Skinny 2.1

      No Karol they actively plotted against the leader undermining him where ever they thought they could get their man air time, thus securing a easier transition when the train crash eventuated. I got the heads up all was not as it seemed, and plenty within the caucus were sitting on their hands. I sent an Invitation to DC only for it not to reach him, his PR staff were bewildered. So I say those pricks in Wellington had interests outside of actually winning the election. On reflexion you only had to look at who was at the leaders election night HQ, or should I say who wasn’t there.

      I suggest the Wellington brigade be depowered by switching the powerbase to South Auckland home of the real grunt workers within Labour.

      As far as I’m concerned we will fight to change Labour but not to strengthen the beltway but to undo them. Then I’m out off to start another political force more true to the values that represent us.

    • lurgee 2.2

      I think you need to digest this part:

      Instead of helping the survivors and securing the scene, the rescue crew start fighting amongst themselves. How did the crash happen? Was it was the driver’s fault? What was the main cause of the accident?

      By now, there’s a decent sized crowd looking on. But it gets worse – no one can agree.

      Though as you’re a Green voter (as am I) I think we’re more the cows in the field nearby, mooing impotently.

      • karol 2.2.1

        I was commenting mostly on this bit:

        But the driver has suffered major trauma – he’s incoherent and struggling to remember what happened. If they could reach him, they might see that while he will survive, it’s obvious that he will never be able to drive trains again.

    • J Mex 2.3

      I think what actually happened was this:

      There was an enormous train crash. The rescue workers turned up to assess the damage. The media arrive as well. The train driver was giving a stand up chat… “What an amazing train! Did you see how fast it was going around the track!!! [tries to high five people] “Can I get a ‘Choo Choo’!”, “Let’ s go build a fasttttter one… ”

      The onlookers are confused. Maybe this guy wasn’t even on the train??? Wiser heads dismiss this. He is clearly the driver – ” he is still clutching a broken steering wheel FFS! ”

      OK. He’s obviously got a head injury from the impact that is affecting his judgement. He is talking complete nonsense. Just smile and give him a cup of tea.

      But will SOMEONE PLEASE confiscate his keys.

    • Murray Olsen 2.4

      The rest of the crew were actively sabotaging the train and disconnected the corner signals, as well as perforating the brake lines. The driver might have noticed this, but he was too busy sabotaging the Hone class locomotive that he thought might take away his passengers.

  3. greywarbler 3

    Sounds like 9/11 – the various crew were on different phones, wavelengths. Or Pike River, those in charge were frozen under regulations on proper procedure when handling boiling water for morning and afternoon teas and couldn’t find the disaster guidelines.

    Don’t know how to apply it to the NZ election. Are first class getting out and being given limousines home while third class are pinned down and weeping?

    Isn’t there a site control manager? The train driver in a wreck is important, but the injured are also. We are not in a wreck with mortally injured people expiring. Don’t see it as a viable analogy.
    edited

  4. SPC 4

    It’s those voters dependent on the Labour Party for good governance who will get hurt if the party crashes and burns at an election.

    • SPC 4.1

      Many hold Cunliffe’s reaction to the result on election night against him. It’s not the defeat but the reaction to the defeat argument to how the party survives the crash. Leading to the notion that if we just blame the driver then he can no longer drive again.

      Others are blaming the selection system for the driver being a driver in the first place to take control of party democracy back to caucus by holding the rescue hostage to the caucus getting their way on this.

  5. Ant 5

    What about that shiny Green train over there? It’s just about to leave. 😀

    • Sans Cle 5.1

      Am on that train………out of my car and into public transport……….it’s not a gravy train like the shiny blue one over there!

  6. Marksman33 6

    Was the train Chinese built or Spanish built ? either way, after much discussion, The driver is to blame. That’s the Kiwi way.

  7. newsense 7

    So the caucus were passengers? Sounds about right looking at their party vote tallys.
    An old fashion sailing ship with 7 skippers would be a better analogy.

    • lurgee 7.1

      Instead of helping the survivors and securing the scene, the rescue crew start fighting amongst themselves. How did the crash happen? Was it was the driver’s fault? What was the main cause of the accident?

      By now, there’s a decent sized crowd looking on. But it gets worse – no one can agree.

      She’s talking about you, there.

  8. newsense 8

    Or if I read it better they were never on board?

  9. Hanswurst 9

    Surely for this analogy to work, the driver would also have to be the director of the emergency response crews. Perhaps the problem wasn’t so much the driver’s capabillites, as that he was constantly forced to answer his mobile while driving, having to co-ordinate the responses when senior emergency services staff inexplicably managed to start fires in their own offices.

  10. Blue 10

    Some people in the train company engineered the crash for the insurance money, knowing they could pin all the blame on the driver.

    • Skinny 10.1

      +1 You got that right!

      • Chooky 10.1.1

        lol…well I dont think they were there to help the driver

        ..it was maybe a doomed train to begin with….with no warrant of fitness …and ripping along on a poorly maintained track…with an ill-tempered , uncooperative , undisciplined crew who mostly resented the nominated driver
        ….and it met a perfect storm of unforeseen events, (with adverse hasty decision consequences mounting up)…. and engineered maleficence.

        • Sans Cle 10.1.1.1

          Wasn’t the crash due to privatisation of the rail, then buying it back, once asset stripped and needing significant reinvestment?

    • Thinker 10.2

      not sure if I’ve copied this asa hyperlink or not, but your story reminded me of this…

      http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Train_Robbery_(1963)

  11. the pigman 11

    Cute analogy, vividly conveyed.

    At the end of the day, it sounds like just another Wellington staffer/Robertson Young Labour acolyte calling for Cunliffe’s head.

    Funny thing to do, though, characterising the Labour caucus as “rescue workers”. Don’t you think?

    • weka 11.1

      Maybe they were the other train staff. Who instead of looking after each other and the passengers, set about blaming each other and trying to manipulate who was going to be next train driver.

      But then there is the problem of who the passengers are. Membership? Voters?

      The rescue crew should be those outside who want to help Labour in trouble.

  12. weka 12

    Heh, just this afternoon I described to someone that following politics on line this week is like watching a train wreck in slow motion (ref Labour party).

    • Sans Cle 12.1

      You know what? Last Sunday week (pre election) I was thinking we were in for a week of a train wreck for National, given Greenwald’s allegations! I know HOW (complicit media, public “believing” his declassified docs, even though they had nothing to do with Greenwald’s allegations) Key managed to avoid a mess…….but it still beggars belief that one week later, we see this! Truly astonishing. …..and what a bloody week makes in politics!

  13. newsense 13

    @ lurgee sure why not? How about this : the train hit a storm and lost its payload because every officer decided to protect their own carriage and detached it from the train, because if they saved their cargo they might get a driving gig. They lost a lot of cargo. They didn’t tell the driver who used all his skill to bring the train safely to the destination as best as he could. Despite the carriages who didn’t detach holding a lot of cargo, the driver gets the blame for the lot and the detachees start to viscerally attack his judgement as they jockey to take
    over as driver. The driver has worked for the railways for a long time and been a reasonable driver in the short time he’s had the wheel. Many voices blame him, but many who need the cargo and are making do with less remember him from over the years and still back him.

  14. Tigger 14

    The media are stoking this fire?

    Did they incite such discord after 2002 (when National got less vite than Labour just did)? Of course not!

    Ignore the pundits, regroup and stop leaking.

    Oh, and to those who are planning g to be leader – if you’re a straight white male then you don’t have my vote. Had three in a row – time for change.

  15. ropata 15

    later on the accident investigation reveals that the track was greased with whale blubber, the instructions to the driver had been garbled by sinister hackers, and the brake cables were rusted by a strange blue acid of reptilian origin

  16. philj 16

    xox
    Or is it more like the Erebus flight disaster when Captain Collins (deceased) gets blamed for crashing into the mountain after been given faulty map coordinates? Cunners is the fall guy for a massive systemic failure imo.

    • KJT 16.1

      Except it was Collins job to check the waypoints. No matter where they came from.

      Unlike Cunliffe, who was shafted in the air by his senior officers.

      You don’t trust the shore staff with your navigation.

    • Chooky 16.2

      philj + KJT +100..and the driver/pilot could not check the coordinates because he was too busy watching his back…and flying into a whiteout storm

      …He was flying blind and at speed, totally reliant on the navigators’ coordinates ….which were wrong

  17. Redzone 17

    A bit too Tangiwai for my liking!. But for the sake of the metaphor..

    Old driver has been sharfted by noisy disloyal ticket collectors and never got (allowed to get?) his full license anyway. Unfortunately there is too much baggage strewn around too. Other old driver couldn’t drive without tripping up . Lost his licence and so no use reinstating him. Anyway theres a train at the UN station apparently. Beltway driver is well stuck in the beltway. Competent but not the right choice. New Napier rookie apprentice drivers time has yet to come.

    No. Need fresh new driver that travels without serious baggage and can bring new perspective. Will also collaborate with the electrified green commuter train. That’s jacinda. Time to step up.

    • Anne 17.1

      Not enough experience Redzone. Don’t burn her out before her time has come. She’s tough, but still has a way to go. Needs some extensive cabinet experience under her belt. Keep her for the future – when she’s ready for the job.

  18. tricle up 18

    Move centre to left doesn’t mean you have to change the pilot ..

  19. newsense 19

    meanwhile, back in the ‘National is getting a very secure hold on the country’ world http://norightturn.blogspot.co.nz/2014/09/dirty-politics-continues-as-usual.html

    and NZ isn’t concerned because that Labour guy turned out to be completely useless and hopeless, even his mates don’t like him and they’re all the same anyway right?

  20. newsense 20

    meanwhile, back in the ‘National is getting a very secure hold on the country’ world http://norightturn.blogspot.co.nz/2014/09/dirty-politics-continues-as-usual.html

    and NZ isn’t concerned because that Labour guy turned out to be completely useless and hopeless, even his mates don’t like him and they’re all the same anyway right?

  21. Millsy 21

    Heh. I think the rescuers should include everyone involved in the train company, not just the conductors. Cooperate and have a good think, maybe. Get on with the task at hand.

  22. rain33 22

    If you insist on analogies…The carriages were laden with many great things as the red train left the station. However, early on in its journey the train failed to ignore warnings from the gathering crowds along its way that the train was maybe on the wrong track. Insisting they were most definitely on the correct track, they closed all the windows and increased their speed, dangerously careering along the tracks at times.

    There were several other trains heading to the same station, but all the trains followed different routes to get to their final destination. The cargo in the wagons of the lovely red train was starting to spoil, but it went unnoticed by the driver and his crew as they were all up the front, and had forgotten about their precious cargo. Even though the cargo was fresh and lovely when it left the station, unless it was attended to during the journey, it would quickly spoil…and sadly it would not be delivered to all the people waiting for the lovely red train to arrive at the station.

    Meanwhile a flash blue train arrived at the station, with all its cargo intact and luscious. The people with tickets for the blue train were very excited when they saw the quality of the cargo. The people with tickets for the red train were looking down the tracks for any sign of their lovely red train..but alas it was nowhere to be seen.
    “Don’t worry…apparently there are wonderful things in the red train” said a red ticket holder. But then the rain came down, the tickets got soggy, and still no sign of the red train. “These tickets are useless now” said a red ticket holder. “By the time it arrives, its cargo will have spoiled and will be of no use to us” …. “Who’s the driver of the red train?!” a frustrated ticket holder yelled out. “Who cares” was the reply “I’m not buying anymore red tickets…their cargo might be wonderful, but if they cant deliver it to us then it is useless”. “I’m going to check out one of those blue or green tickets…their train is already at the station…apparently their cargo is nowhere near as good, but they looked after it and delivered to their ticket holders” …”ticketmaster!!”

    Now the owners of the red train were very disappointed. Their train was a wreck, their cargo would go to waste as it could not be delivered. The driver, the crew and the owners were all very angry and were arguing among themselves about who was mostly to blame. But sadly everyone seemed to have forgotten about the red ticket holders back at the station. Sensing an opportunity, the blue train threw some scraps to the red ticket holders. The red ticket holders were very wary of the other blue train, but they decided scraps would have to do. Their red train had failed to deliver its precious cargo, and they were very hungry…so they didn’t much care why.

  23. dale 23

    The red train started out a little empty, but with a good new driver that had seen many large networks in despairs and helped out where he could. He was making a pretty good job of filling the train, but it was not easy as some of the longer term workers wouldn’t help with the loading. So at the next stop he asked if they wanted a new driver and to his despair they said yes. All the passengers already on the train chose the new driver. But the train wasn’t anywhere near full and the passengers waiting got a little anxious about the new driver. They had seen him before making toot toot noises and pretending to play with the controls a long time ago even telling the then she driver that some other boys were doing it but they weren’t. The waiting passenger’s looked on as the new driver picked up a very big and unstable carriage because it had paid a deposit. Then in his excitement to collect the waiting passengers he didn’t read the warning signs and then the weight of the fat unstable carriage took over and crashed the train. And spilled its cargo. Bloody books and traitors nasty lies everywhere.
    Then came the blue train…………

    • Hanswurst 23.1

      The red train started out a little empty, but with a good new driver […].

      You lost me right there.

  24. lurgee 24

    After the crash, a strange idea emerges that the crash would have been avoided if the train had driven on only one track – the left, or the right.

  25. Charles Temworth. 25

    Grant Robertson and his backroom nastiness(the actual real divisive eliment within Labour) wont change anything for Labour Trickle down is correct Cunliffe performed very well stuf the media they just want drama and are paid for by National cronies.

  26. David H 26

    No analogies needed

    1: Labour lost weeks/months before the election date. Election day was the official date of death.

    2: Labour will continue to lose until they have politicians that are there for the good of the party, and not for their own personal gain. You call them ABC this is wrong it should be ABW (Anything but winning).

    3: Labour will continue to crash and burn until the destructive element is rooted out and evicted.

    4: Labour have to be so mistake free that they cannot be attacked. and if they do or don’t dump the Leader they are damned my the media.

    5: Labour NEED to ban Gower Obrien Sabin Dann and any other jonolist who has hearing issues.

    6: Dump disruptive members to the back bench.

    7 Impress on new members the importance of showing a united party to the media, so no leaking like the ABW club.

    Then I might just think about giving my valuable vote back to them.

  27. dale 27

    Hanswurst. David Shearer.

  28. JRyan 28

    The left lost simply because of low tactics that blew right back in their face. One gets back what you give out. KDC is poison and swallowing his propaganda and delight of potentionally ramming a lance into National was seen for what it was. Low, dirty politics. Nasty. Maybe try and run a clean campaign, let policy be the sword.

    • joe90 28.1

      These low tactics – cite please?.

    • Colonial Viper 28.2

      You clearly know that “Dirty Politics” was run out of the 9th floor, just down the corridor from John Key’s office.

      But you are giving John Key a pass on it. Why?

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  • 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #11
    A listing of 35 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, March 10, 2024 thru Sat, March 16, 2024. Story of the week This week we'll give you a little glimpse into how we collect links to share and ...
    2 days ago
  • Out of Touch.
    “I’ve been internalising a really complicated situation in my head.”When they kept telling us we should wait until we get to know him, were they taking the piss? Was it a case of, if you think this is bad, wait till you get to know the real Christopher, after the ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    2 days ago
  • Bring out your Dad
    Happy fourth anniversary, Pandemic That Upended Bloody Everything. I have been observing it by enjoying my second bout of COVID. It’s 5.30 on Sunday morning and only now are lights turning back on for me.Allow me to copy and paste what I told reader Sara yesterday:Depleted, fogged and crappy. Resting, ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 days ago
  • Bring out your Dad
    Happy fourth anniversary, Pandemic That Upended Bloody Everything. I have been observing it by enjoying my second bout of COVID. It’s 5.30 on Sunday morning and only now are lights turning back on for me.Allow me to copy and paste what I told reader Sara yesterday:Depleted, fogged and crappy. Resting, ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 days ago
  • Bring out your Dad
    Happy fourth anniversary, Pandemic That Upended Bloody Everything. I have been observing it by enjoying my second bout of COVID. It’s 5.30 on Sunday morning and only now are lights turning back on for me.Allow me to copy and paste what I told reader Sara yesterday:Depleted, fogged and crappy. Resting, ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    2 days ago
  • The bewildering world of Chris Luxon – Guns for all, not no lunch for kids
    .“$10 and a target that bleeds” - Bleeding Targets for Under $10!.Thanks for reading Frankly Speaking ! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.This government appears hell-bent on either scrapping life-saving legislation or reintroducing things that - frustrated critics insist - will be dangerous and likely ...
    Frankly SpeakingBy Frank Macskasy
    3 days ago
  • Expert Opinion: Ageing Boomers, Laurie & Les, Talk Politics.
    It hardly strikes me as fair to criticise a government for doing exactly what it said it was going to do. For actually keeping its promises.”THUNDER WAS PLAYING TAG with lightning flashes amongst the distant peaks. Its rolling cadences interrupted by the here-I-come-here-I-go Doppler effect of the occasional passing car. ...
    3 days ago
  • Manufacturing The Truth.
    Subversive & Disruptive Technologies: Just as happened with that other great regulator of the masses, the Medieval Church, the advent of a new and hard-to-control technology – the Internet –  is weakening the ties that bind. Then, and now, those who enjoy a monopoly on the dissemination of lies, cannot and will ...
    3 days ago
  • A Powerful Sensation of Déjà Vu.
    Been Here Before: To find the precedents for what this Coalition Government is proposing, it is necessary to return to the “glory days” of Muldoonism.THE COALITION GOVERNMENT has celebrated its first 100 days in office by checking-off the last of its listed commitments. It remains, however, an angry government. It ...
    3 days ago
  • Can you guess where world attention is focussed (according to Greenpeace)? It’s focussed on an EPA...
    Bob Edlin writes –  And what is the world watching today…? The email newsletter from Associated Press which landed in our mailbox early this morning advised: In the news today: The father of a school shooter has been found guilty of involuntary manslaughter; prosecutors in Trump’s hush-money case ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    3 days ago
  • Further integrity problems for the Greens in suspending MP Darleen Tana
    Bryce Edwards writes – Is another Green MP on their way out? And are the Greens severely tarnished by another integrity scandal? For the second time in three months, the Green Party has secretly suspended an MP over integrity issues. Mystery is surrounding the party’s decision to ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    3 days ago
  • Jacqui Van Der Kaay: Greens’ transparency missing in action
    For the last few years, the Green Party has been the party that has managed to avoid the plague of multiple scandals that have beleaguered other political parties. It appears that their luck has run out with a second scandal which, unfortunately for them, coincided with Golraz Ghahraman, the focus ...
    Democracy ProjectBy bryce.edwards
    3 days ago
  • Bernard’s Dawn Chorus with six newsey things at 6:46am for Saturday, March 16
    TL;DR: The six newsey things that stood out to me as of 6:46am on Saturday, March 16.Andy Foster has accidentally allowed a Labour/Green amendment to cut road user chargers for plug-in hybrid vehicles, which the Government might accept; NZ Herald Thomas Coughlan Simeon Brown has rejected a plea from Westport ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    3 days ago
  • How Did FTX Crash?
    What seemed a booming success a couple of years ago has collapsed into fraud convictions.I looked at the crash of FTX (short for ‘Futures Exchange’) in November 2022 to see whether it would impact on the financial system as a whole. Fortunately there was barely a ripple, probably because it ...
    PunditBy Brian Easton
    4 days ago
  • Elections in Russia and Ukraine
    Anybody following the situation in Ukraine and Russia would probably have been amused by a recent Tweet on X NATO seems to be putting in an awful lot of effort to influence what is, at least according to them, a sham election in an autocracy.When do the Ukrainians go to ...
    4 days ago
  • Bernard’s six stack of substacks at 6pm on March 15
    TL;DR: Shaun Baker on Wynyard Quarter's transformation. Magdalene Taylor on the problem with smart phones. How private equity are now all over reinsurance. Dylan Cleaver on rugby and CTE. Emily Atkin on ‘Big Meat’ looking like ‘Big Oil’.Bernard’s six-stack of substacks at 6pm on March 15Photo by Jeppe Hove Jensen ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • Buzz from the Beehive Finance Minister Nicola Willis had plenty to say when addressing the Auckland Business Chamber on the economic growth that (she tells us) is flagging more than we thought. But the government intends to put new life into it:  We want our country to be a ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    4 days ago
  • National’s clean car tax advances
    The Transport and Infrastructure Committee has reported back on the Road User Charges (Light Electric RUC Vehicles) Amendment Bill, basicly rubberstamping it. While there was widespread support among submitters for the principle that EV and PHEV drivers should pay their fair share for the roads, they also overwhelmingly disagreed with ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    4 days ago
  • Government funding bailouts
    Peter Dunne writes – This week’s government bailout – the fifth in the last eighteen months – of the financially troubled Ruapehu Alpine Lifts company would have pleased many in the central North Island ski industry. The government’s stated rationale for the $7 million funding was that it ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • Two offenders, different treatments.
    See if you can spot the difference. An Iranian born female MP from a progressive party is accused of serial shoplifting. Her name is leaked to the media, which goes into a pack frenzy even before the Police launch an … Continue reading ...
    KiwipoliticoBy Pablo
    4 days ago
  • Treaty references omitted
    Ele Ludemann writes  – The government is omitting general Treaty references from legislation : The growth of Treaty of Waitangi clauses in legislation caused so much worry that a special oversight group was set up by the last Government in a bid to get greater coherence in the public service on Treaty ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • The Ghahraman Conflict
    What was that judge thinking? Peter Williams writes –  That Golriz Ghahraman and District Court Judge Maria Pecotic were once lawyer colleagues is incontrovertible. There is published evidence that they took at least one case to the Court of Appeal together. There was a report on ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    4 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 15
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Climate Scorpion – the sting is in the tail. Introducing planetary solvency. A paper via the University of Exeter’s Institute and Faculty of Actuaries.Local scoop: Kāinga Ora starts pulling out of its Auckland projects and selling land RNZ ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • The day Wellington up-zoned its future
    Wellington’s massively upzoned District Plan adds the opportunity for tens of thousands of new homes not just in the central city (such as these Webb St new builds) but also close to the CBD and public transport links. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: Wellington gave itself the chance of ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    4 days ago
  • Weekly Roundup 15-March-2024
    It’s Friday and we’re halfway through March Madness. Here’s some of the things that caught our attention this week. This Week in Greater Auckland On Monday Matt asked how we can get better event trains and an option for grade separating Morningside Dr. On Tuesday Matt looked into ...
    Greater AucklandBy Greater Auckland
    4 days ago
  • That Word.
    Something you might not know about me is that I’m quite a stubborn person. No, really. I don’t much care for criticism I think’s unfair or that I disagree with. Few of us do I suppose.Back when I was a drinker I’d sometimes respond defensively, even angrily. There are things ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    4 days ago
  • The Hoon around the week to March 15
    Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāTL;DR: The five things that mattered in Aotearoa’s political economy that we wrote and spoke about via The Kākā and elsewhere for paying subscribers in the last week included:PM Christopher Luxon said the reversal of interest deductibility for landlords was done to help renters, who ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago
  • Labour’s policy gap
    It was not so much the Labour Party but really the Chris Hipkins party yesterday at Labour’s caucus retreat in Martinborough. The former Prime Minister was more or less consistent on wealth tax, which he was at best equivocal about, and social insurance, which he was not willing to revisit. ...
    PolitikBy Richard Harman
    5 days ago
  • Skeptical Science New Research for Week #11 2024
    Open access notables A Glimpse into the Future: The 2023 Ocean Temperature and Sea Ice Extremes in the Context of Longer-Term Climate Change, Kuhlbrodt et al., Bulletin of the American Meteorological Society: In the year 2023, we have seen extraordinary extrema in high sea surface temperature (SST) in the North Atlantic and in ...
    5 days ago
  • Melissa remains mute on media matters but has something to say (at a sporting event) about economic ...
     Buzz from the Beehive   The text reproduced above appears on a page which records all the media statements and speeches posted on the government’s official website by Melissa Lee as Minister of Media and Communications and/or by Jenny Marcroft, her Parliamentary Under-secretary.  It can be quickly analysed ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    5 days ago
  • The return of Muldoon
    For forty years, Robert Muldoon has been a dirty word in our politics. His style of government was so repulsive and authoritarian that the backlash to it helped set and entrench our constitutional norms. His pig-headedness over forcing through Think Big eventually gave us the RMA, with its participation and ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    5 days ago
  • Will the rental tax cut improve life for renters or landlords?
    Bryce Edwards writes –  Is the new government reducing tax on rental properties to benefit landlords or to cut the cost of rents? That’s the big question this week, after Associate Finance Minister David Seymour announced on Sunday that the Government would be reversing the Labour Government’s removal ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • Geoffrey Miller: What Saudi Arabia’s rapid changes mean for New Zealand
    Saudi Arabia is rarely far from the international spotlight. The war in Gaza has brought new scrutiny to Saudi plans to normalise relations with Israel, while the fifth anniversary of the controversial killing of Jamal Khashoggi was marked shortly before the war began on October 7. And as the home ...
    Democracy ProjectBy Geoffrey Miller
    5 days ago
  • Racism’s double standards
    Questions need to be asked on both sides of the world Peter Williams writes –   The NRL Judiciary hands down an eight week suspension to Sydney Roosters forward Spencer Leniu , an Auckland-born Samoan, after he calls Ezra Mam, Sydney-orn but of Aboriginal and Torres Strait ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • It’s not a tax break
    Ele Ludemann writes – Contrary to what many headlines and news stories are saying, residential landlords are not getting a tax break. The government is simply restoring to them the tax deductibility of interest they had until the previous government removed it. There is no logical reason ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • The Plastic Pig Collective and Chris' Imaginary Friends.
    I can't remember when it was goodMoments of happiness in bloomMaybe I just misunderstoodAll of the love we left behindWatching our flashbacks intertwineMemories I will never findIn spite of whatever you becomeForget that reckless thing turned onI think our lives have just begunI think our lives have just begunDoes anyone ...
    Nick’s KōreroBy Nick Rockel
    5 days ago
  • Who is responsible for young offenders?
    Michael Bassett writes – At first reading, a front-page story in the New Zealand Herald on 13 March was bizarre. A group of severely intellectually limited teenagers, with little understanding of the law, have been pleading to the Justice Select Committee not to pass a bill dealing with ram ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    5 days ago
  • Gordon Campbell on National’s fantasy trip to La La Landlord Land
    How much political capital is Christopher Luxon willing to burn through in order to deliver his $2.9 billion gift to landlords? Evidently, Luxon is: (a) unable to cost the policy accurately. As Anna Burns-Francis pointed out to him on Breakfast TV, the original ”rock solid” $2.1 billion cost he was ...
    5 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 14
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Jonathon Porritt calling bullshit in his own blog post on mainstream climate science as ‘The New Denialism’.Local scoop: The Wellington City Council’s list of proposed changes to the IHP recommendations to be debated later today was leaked this ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago
  • No, Prime Minister, rents don’t rise or fall with landlords’ costs
    TL;DR: Prime Minister Christopher Luxon said yesterday tenants should be grateful for the reinstatement of interest deductibility because landlords would pass on their lower tax costs in the form of lower rents. That would be true if landlords were regulated monopolies such as Transpower or Auckland Airport1, but they’re not, ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    5 days ago
  • Cartoons: ‘At least I didn’t make things awkward’
    This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Tom Toro Tom Toro is a cartoonist and author. He has published over 200 cartoons in The New Yorker since 2010. His cartoons appear in Playboy, the Paris Review, the New York Times, American Bystander, and elsewhere. Related: What 10 EV lovers ...
    5 days ago
  • Solving traffic congestion with Richard Prebble
    The business section of the NZ Herald is full of opinion. Among the more opinionated of all is the ex-Minister of Transport, ex-Minister of Railways, ex MP for Auckland Central (1975-93, Labour), Wellington Central (1996-99, ACT, then list-2005), ex-leader of the ACT Party, uncle to actor Antonia, the veritable granddaddy ...
    Greater AucklandBy Patrick Reynolds
    5 days ago
  • I Think I'm Done Flying Boeing
    Hi,Just quickly — I’m blown away by the stories you’ve shared with me over the last week since I put out the ‘Gary’ podcast, where I told you about the time my friend’s flatmate killed the neighbour.And you keep telling me stories — in the comments section, and in my ...
    David FarrierBy David Farrier
    5 days ago
  • Invoking Aristotle: Of Rings of Power, Stones, and Ships
    The first season of Rings of Power was not awful. It was thoroughly underwhelming, yes, and left a lingering sense of disappointment, but it was more expensive mediocrity than catastrophe. I wrote at length about the series as it came out (see the Review section of the blog, and go ...
    6 days ago
  • Van Velden brings free-market approach to changing labour laws – but her colleagues stick to distr...
    Buzz from the Beehive Workplace Relations and Safety Minister Brooke van Velden told Auckland Business Chamber members they were the first audience to hear her priorities as a minister in a government committed to cutting red tape and regulations. She brandished her liberalising credentials, saying Flexible labour markets are the ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago
  • Why Newshub failed
    Chris Trotter writes – TO UNDERSTAND WHY NEWSHUB FAILED, it is necessary to understand how TVNZ changed. Up until 1989, the state broadcaster had been funded by a broadcasting licence fee, collected from every citizen in possession of a television set, supplemented by a relatively modest (compared ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago
  • Māori Party on the warpath against landlords and seabed miners – let’s see if mystical creature...
    Bob Edlin writes  –  The Māori Party has been busy issuing a mix of warnings and threats as its expresses its opposition to interest deductibility for landlords and the plans of seabed miners. It remains to be seen whether they  follow the example of indigenous litigants in Australia, ...
    Point of OrderBy Bob Edlin
    6 days ago
  • There’s a name for this
    Every year, in the Budget, Parliament forks out money to government agencies to do certain things. And every year, as part of the annual review cycle, those agencies are meant to report on whether they have done the things Parliament gave them that money for. Agencies which consistently fail to ...
    No Right TurnBy Idiot/Savant
    6 days ago
  • Echoes of 1968 in 2024?  Pocock on the repetitive problems of the New Left
    Mike Grimshaw writes – Recent events in American universities point to an underlying crisis of coherent thinking, an issue that increasingly affects the progressive left across the Western world. This of course is nothing new as anyone who can either remember or has read of the late ...
    Point of OrderBy poonzteam5443
    6 days ago
  • Two bar blues
    The thing about life’s little victories is that they can be followed by a defeat.Reader Darryl told me on Monday night:Test again Dave. My “head cold” last week became COVID within 24 hours, and is still with me. I hear the new variants take a bit longer to show up ...
    More Than A FeildingBy David Slack
    6 days ago
  • Bernard's Top 10 @ 10 'pick 'n' mix' for March 13
    TL;DR: My top 10 news and analysis links this morning include:Today’s must-read: Angus Deaton on rethinking his economics IMFLocal scoop: The people behind Tamarind, the firm that left a $500m cleanup bill for taxpayers at Taranaki’s Tui oil well, are back operating in Taranaki under a different company name. Jonathan ...
    The KakaBy Bernard Hickey
    6 days ago

  • Positive progress for social worker workforce
    New Zealand’s social workers are qualified, experienced, and more representative of the communities they serve, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. “I want to acknowledge and applaud New Zealand’s social workers for the hard work they do, providing invaluable support for our most vulnerable. “To coincide with World ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 hours ago
  • Minister confirms reduced RUC rate for PHEVs
    Cabinet has agreed to a reduced road user charge (RUC) rate for plug-in hybrid electric vehicles (PHEVs), Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. Owners of PHEVs will be eligible for a reduced rate of $38 per 1,000km once all light electric vehicles (EVs) move into the RUC system from 1 April.  ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 hours ago
  • Trade access to overseas markets creates jobs
    Minister of Agriculture and Trade, Todd McClay, says that today’s opening of Riverland Foods manufacturing plant in Christchurch is a great example of how trade access to overseas markets creates jobs in New Zealand.  Speaking at the official opening of this state-of-the-art pet food factory the Minister noted that exports ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    7 hours ago
  • NZ and Chinese Foreign Ministers hold official talks
    Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters met with Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi in Wellington today. “It was a pleasure to host Foreign Minister Wang Yi during his first official visit to New Zealand since 2017. Our discussions were wide-ranging and enabled engagement on many facets of New Zealand’s relationship with China, including trade, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    21 hours ago
  • Kāinga Ora instructed to end Sustaining Tenancies
    Kāinga Ora – Homes & Communities has been instructed to end the Sustaining Tenancies Framework and take stronger measures against persistent antisocial behaviour by tenants, says Housing Minister Chris Bishop. “Earlier today Finance Minister Nicola Willis and I sent an interim Letter of Expectations to the Board of Kāinga Ora. ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    1 day ago
  • Speech to Auckland Business Chamber: Growth is the answer
    Tēna koutou katoa. Greetings everyone. Thank you to the Auckland Chamber of Commerce and the Honourable Simon Bridges for hosting this address today. I acknowledge the business leaders in this room, the leaders and governors, the employers, the entrepreneurs, the investors, and the wealth creators. The coalition Government shares your ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    3 days ago
  • Singapore rounds out regional trip
    Minister Winston Peters completed the final leg of his visit to South and South East Asia in Singapore today, where he focused on enhancing one of New Zealand’s indispensable strategic partnerships.      “Singapore is our most important defence partner in South East Asia, our fourth-largest trading partner and a ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Minister van Velden represents New Zealand at International Democracy Summit
    Minister of Internal Affairs and Workplace Relations and Safety, Hon. Brooke van Velden, will travel to the Republic of Korea to represent New Zealand at the Third Summit for Democracy on 18 March. The summit, hosted by the Republic of Korea, was first convened by the United States in 2021, ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Insurance Council of NZ Speech, 7 March 2024, Auckland
    ICNZ Speech 7 March 2024, Auckland  Acknowledgements and opening  Mōrena, ngā mihi nui. Ko Andrew Bayly aho, Nor Whanganui aho.  Good morning, it’s a privilege to be here to open the ICNZ annual conference, thank you to Mark for the Mihi Whakatau  My thanks to Tim Grafton for inviting me ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Five-year anniversary of Christchurch terror attacks
    Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Lead Coordination Minister Judith Collins have expressed their deepest sympathy on the five-year anniversary of the Christchurch terror attacks. “March 15, 2019, was a day when families, communities and the country came together both in sorrow and solidarity,” Mr Luxon says.  “Today we pay our respects to the 51 shuhada ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Speech for Financial Advice NZ Conference 5 March 2024
    Speech for Financial Advice NZ Conference 5 March 2024  Acknowledgements and opening  Morena, Nga Mihi Nui.  Ko Andrew Bayly aho, Nor Whanganui aho. Thanks Nate for your Mihi Whakatau  Good morning. It’s a pleasure to formally open your conference this morning. What a lovely day in Wellington, What a great ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    4 days ago
  • Early visit to Indonesia strengthens ties
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters held discussions in Jakarta today about the future of relations between New Zealand and South East Asia’s most populous country.   “We are in Jakarta so early in our new government’s term to reflect the huge importance we place on our relationship with Indonesia and South ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • China Foreign Minister to visit
    Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters has announced that the Foreign Minister of China, Wang Yi, will visit New Zealand next week.  “We look forward to re-engaging with Foreign Minister Wang Yi and discussing the full breadth of the bilateral relationship, which is one of New Zealand’s ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Minister opens new Auckland Rail Operations Centre
    Transport Minister Simeon Brown has today opened the new Auckland Rail Operations Centre, which will bring together KiwiRail, Auckland Transport, and Auckland One Rail to improve service reliability for Aucklanders. “The recent train disruptions in Auckland have highlighted how important it is KiwiRail and Auckland’s rail agencies work together to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Celebrating 10 years of Crankworx Rotorua
    The Government is proud to support the 10th edition of Crankworx Rotorua as the Crankworx World Tour returns to Rotorua from 16-24 March 2024, says Minister for Economic Development Melissa Lee.  “Over the past 10 years as Crankworx Rotorua has grown, so too have the economic and social benefits that ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Government delivering on tax commitments
    Legislation implementing coalition Government tax commitments and addressing long-standing tax anomalies will be progressed in Parliament next week, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. The legislation is contained in an Amendment Paper to the Taxation (Annual Rates for 2023–24, Multinational Tax, and Remedial Matters) Bill issued today.  “The Amendment Paper represents ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Significant Natural Areas requirement to be suspended
    Associate Environment Minister Andrew Hoggard has today announced that the Government has agreed to suspend the requirement for councils to comply with the Significant Natural Areas (SNA) provisions of the National Policy Statement for Indigenous Biodiversity for three years, while it replaces the Resource Management Act (RMA).“As it stands, SNAs ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Government classifies drought conditions in Top of the South as medium-scale adverse event
    Agriculture Minister Todd McClay has classified the drought conditions in the Marlborough, Tasman, and Nelson districts as a medium-scale adverse event, acknowledging the challenging conditions facing farmers and growers in the district. “Parts of Marlborough, Tasman, and Nelson districts are in the grip of an intense dry spell. I know ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • Government partnership to tackle $332m facial eczema problem
    The Government is helping farmers eradicate the significant impact of facial eczema (FE) in pastoral animals, Agriculture Minister Todd McClay announced.  “A $20 million partnership jointly funded by Beef + Lamb NZ, the Government, and the primary sector will save farmers an estimated NZD$332 million per year, and aims to ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    5 days ago
  • NZ, India chart path to enhanced relationship
    Foreign Minister Winston Peters has completed a successful visit to India, saying it was an important step in taking the relationship between the two countries to the next level.   “We have laid a strong foundation for the Coalition Government’s priority of enhancing New Zealand-India relations to generate significant future benefit for both countries,” says Mr Peters, ...
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    6 days ago
  • Ruapehu Alpine Lifts bailout the last, say Ministers
    Cabinet has agreed to provide $7 million to ensure the 2024 ski season can go ahead on the Whakapapa ski field in the central North Island but has told the operator Ruapehu Alpine Lifts it is the last financial support it will receive from taxpayers. Cabinet also agreed to provide ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Govt takes action to drive better cancer services
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says the launch of a new mobile breast screening unit in Counties Manukau reinforces the coalition Government’s commitment to drive better cancer services for all New Zealanders. Speaking at the launch of the new mobile clinic, Dr Reti says it’s a great example of taking ...
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    6 days ago
  • Govt takes action to drive better cancer services
    Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says the launch of a new mobile breast screening unit in Counties Manukau reinforces the coalition Government’s commitment to drive better cancer services for all New Zealanders. Speaking at the launch of the new mobile clinic, Dr Reti says it’s a great example of taking ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Work begins on SH29 upgrades near Tauriko
    Unlocking economic growth and land for housing are critical elements of the Government’s plan for our transport network, and planned upgrades to State Highway 29 (SH29) near Tauriko will deliver strongly on those priorities, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “The SH29 upgrades near Tauriko will improve safety at the intersections ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Work begins on SH29 upgrades near Tauriko
    Unlocking economic growth and land for housing are critical elements of the Government’s plan for our transport network, and planned upgrades to State Highway 29 (SH29) near Tauriko will deliver strongly on those priorities, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “The SH29 upgrades near Tauriko will improve safety at the intersections ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Fresh produce price drop welcome
    Lower fruit and vegetable prices are welcome news for New Zealanders who have been doing it tough at the supermarket, Finance Minister Nicola Willis says. Stats NZ reported today the price of fruit and vegetables has dropped 9.3 percent in the 12 months to February 2024.  “Lower fruit and vege ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Statement to the 68th United Nations Commission on the Status of Women
    Tēnā koutou katoa and greetings to you all.  Chair, I am honoured to address the sixty-eighth session of the Commission on the Status of Women. I acknowledge the many crises impacting the rights of women and girls. Heightened global tensions, war, climate related and humanitarian disasters, and price inflation all ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
    6 days ago
  • Speech to the 68th United Nations Commission on the Status of Women (CSW68)
    Tēnā koutou katoa and greetings to you all.  Chair, I am honoured to address the 68th session of the Commission on the Status of Women. I acknowledge the many crises impacting the rights of women and girls. Heightened global tensions, war, climate related and humanitarian disasters, and price inflation all ...
    BeehiveBy beehive.govt.nz
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  • Speech to Auckland Business Chamber
    Good evening everyone and thank you for that lovely introduction.   Thank you also to the Honourable Simon Bridges for the invitation to address your members. Since being sworn in, this coalition Government has hit the ground running with our 100-day plan, delivering the changes that New Zealanders expect of us. ...
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  • Commission’s advice on ETS settings tabled
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  • Government lowering building costs
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  • Trustee tax change welcomed
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  • Minister’s Ramadan message
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  • Speech to Life Sciences Summit
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  • Minister to attend World Anti-Doping Agency Symposium
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  • Pacific Language Weeks celebrate regional unity
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