Caption contest
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10:00 am, January 7th, 2019 - 74 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour, Simon Bridges, The Standard -
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- The 1 Good Thing Left In Journalism
Hi,It’s almost Christmas Day which means it is almost my birthday, where you will find me whimpering in the corner clutching a warm bottle of Baileys.If you’re out of ideas for presents (and truly desperate) then it is possible to gift a full Webworm subscription to a friend (or enemy) ...1 hour ago - Bernard’s Picks ‘n’ Mixes for Monday, December 23
This morning’s six standouts for me at 6.30am include:Rachel Helyer Donaldson’s scoop via RNZ last night of cuts to maternity jobs in the health system;Maddy Croad’s scoop via The Press-$ this morning on funding cuts for Christchurch’s biggest food rescue charity;Benedict Collins’ scoop last night via 1News on a last-minute ...2 hours ago - 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #51
A listing of 25 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, December 15, 2024 thru Sat, December 21, 2024. Based on feedback we received, this week's roundup is the first one published soleley by category. We are still interested in ...10 hours ago - Dance Magic
Well, I've been there, sitting in that same chairWhispering that same prayer half a million timesIt's a lie, though buried in disciplesOne page of the Bible isn't worth a lifeThere's nothing wrong with youIt's true, it's trueThere's something wrong with the villageWith the villageSomething wrong with the villageSongwriters: Andrew Jackson ...22 hours ago - Government Forces Universities to Enforce “Free Speech” While Limiting Universities̵...
ACT would like to dictate what universities can and can’t say. We knew it was coming. It was outlined in the coalition agreement and has become part of Seymour’s strategy of “emphasising public funding” to prevent people from opposing him and his views—something he also uses to try and de-platform ...22 hours ago - Fact brief – Are we heading into an ‘ice age’?
Skeptical Science is partnering with Gigafact to produce fact briefs — bite-sized fact checks of trending claims. This fact brief was written by Sue Bin Park from the Gigafact team in collaboration with members from our team. You can submit claims you think need checking via the tipline. Are we heading ...1 day ago
- As Our Power Lessens: Published
So the Solstice has arrived – Summer in this part of the world, Winter for the Northern Hemisphere. And with it, the publication my new Norse dark-fantasy piece, As Our Power Lessens at Eternal Haunted Summer: https://eternalhauntedsummer.com/issues/winter-solstice-2024/as-our-power-lessens/ As previously noted, this one is very ‘wyrd’, and Northern Theory of Courage. ...2 days ago - By Any Other Name.
The Natural Choice: As a starter for ten percent of the Party Vote, “saving the planet” is a very respectable objective. Young voters, in particular, raised on the dire (if unheeded) warnings of climate scientists, and the irrefutable evidence of devastating weather events linked to global warming, vote Green. After ...2 days ago - Bernard’s last Saturday Soliloquy for 2024
The Government cancelled 60% of Kāinga Ora’s new builds next year, even though the land for them was already bought, the consents were consented and there are builders unemployed all over the place. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMōrena. Long stories short, the six things that mattered in Aotearoa’s political ...2 days ago - Bernard’s Picks ‘n’ Mixes for Saturday, December 21
Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on UnsplashEvery morning I get up at 3am to go around the traps of news sites in Aotearoa and globally. I pick out the top ones from my point of view and have been putting them into my Dawn Chorus email, which goes out with a podcast. ...2 days ago - 2024 OIA stats
Over on Kikorangi Newsroom's Marc Daalder has published his annual OIA stats. So I thought I'd do mine: 82 OIA requests sent in 2024 7 posts based on those requests 20 average working days to receive a response Ministry of Justice was my most-requested entity, ...3 days ago - Climate Change: A perverse incentive
The government published its first Biennial Transparency Report under the Paris Agreement yesterday, and the media has correctly noted that it is missing any plan to actually meet our target. While it hypes domestic emissions reductions so far - which have been good, but will likely get worse thanks to ...3 days ago
- Economic Bulletin December 2024
Welcome to the December 2024 Economic Bulletin. We have two monthly features in this edition. In the first, we discuss what the Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update from Treasury and the Budget Policy Statement from the Minister of Finance tell us about the fiscal position and what to ...3 days ago - NZCTU make submission in opposition to Treaty Principles Bill
The NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi have submitted against the controversial Treaty Principles Bill, slamming the Bill as a breach of Te Tiriti o Waitangi and an attack on tino rangatiratanga and the collective rights of Tangata Whenua. “This Bill seeks to legislate for Te Tiriti o Waitangi principles that are ...3 days ago
- ZB’s Power Couple
I don't knowHow to say what's got to be saidI don't know if it's black or whiteThere's others see it redI don't get the answers rightI'll leave that to youIs this love out of fashionOr is it the time of yearAre these words distraction?To the words you want to hearSongwriters: ...3 days ago - Austerity thumps GDP most since 1991
Our economy has experienced its worst recession since 1991. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāMōrena. Long stories short, the six things that matter in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Friday, December 20 in The Kākā’s Dawn Chorus podcast above and the daily Pick ‘n’ Mix below ...3 days ago
- Weekly Roundup 20-December-2024
Twas the Friday before Christmas and all through the week we’ve been collecting stories for our final roundup of the year. As we start to wind down for the year we hope you all have a safe and happy Christmas and new year. If you’re travelling please be safe on ...3 days ago - The Hoon around the year to December 20, 2024
The podcast above of the weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar for paying subscribers on Thursday night features co-hosts & talking about the year’s news with: on climate. Her book of the year was Tim Winton’s cli-fi novel Juice and she also mentioned Mike Joy’s memoir The Fight for Fresh Water. ...3 days ago
- The baby-boomers’ last gasp
The Government can head off to the holidays, entitled to assure itself that it has done more or less what it said it would do. The campaign last year promised to “get New Zealand back on track.” When you look at the basic promises—to trim back Government expenditure, toughen up ...3 days ago - Skeptical Science New Research for Week #51 2024
Open access notables An intensification of surface Earth’s energy imbalance since the late 20th century, Li et al., Communications Earth & Environment: Tracking the energy balance of the Earth system is a key method for studying the contribution of human activities to climate change. However, accurately estimating the surface energy balance ...3 days ago
- Join us at 5pm for 2024’s last Hoon
Photo by Mauricio Fanfa on UnsplashKia oraCome and join us for our weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar with paying subscribers to The Kākā for an hour at 5 pm today.Jump on this link on YouTube Livestream for our chat about the week’s news with myself , plus regular guests and , ...4 days ago - Christmas Gifts: Ageing Boomers, Laurie & Les, Talk Politics.
“Like you said, I’m an unreconstructed socialist. Everybody deserves to get something for Christmas.”“ONE OF THOSE had better be for me!” Hannah grinned, fascinated, as Laurie made his way, gingerly, to the bar, his arms full of gift-wrapped packages.“Of course!”, beamed Laurie. Depositing his armful on the bar-top and selecting ...4 days ago
- GDP Figures No Christmas Present for New Zealand
Data released by Statistics New Zealand today showed a significant slowdown in the economy over the past six months, with GDP falling by 1% in September, and 1.1% in June said CTU Economist Craig Renney. “The data shows that the size of the economy in GDP terms is now smaller ...4 days ago
- Cheeseburgers and Stunt Monkeys
One last thing before I quitI never wanted any moreThan I could fit into my headI still remember every single word you saidAnd all the shit that somehow came along with itStill, there's one thing that comforts meSince I was always caged and now I'm freeSongwriters: David Grohl / Georg ...4 days ago - MSD rejecting 220 pleas for food grants each day
Sparse offerings outside a Te Kauwhata church. Meanwhile, the Government is cutting spending in ways that make thousands of hungry children even hungrier, while also cutting funding for the charities that help them. It’s also doing that while winding back new building of affordable housing that would allow parents to ...4 days ago
- The Wing Parties’ Economic Policies.
It is difficult to make sense of the Luxon Coalition Government’s economic management.This end-of-year review about the state of economic management – the state of the economy was last week – is not going to cover the National Party contribution. Frankly, like every other careful observer, I cannot make up ...4 days ago - Back on Track
This morning I awoke to the lovely news that we are firmly back on track, that is if the scale was reversed.NZ ranks low in global economic comparisonsNew Zealand's economy has been ranked 33rd out of 37 in an international comparison of which have done best in 2024.Economies were ranked ...4 days ago - Book Review: How Big Things Get Done
This is a guest post by George Weeks, reviewing a book called How Big Things Get Done by Bent Flyvbjerg and Dan Gardner Want to know how to do something big? Ask someone who has done it before! Professor Bent Flyvbjerg has spent his career studying megaprojects. In 2023, ...4 days ago
- Gordon Campbell On Why We Can’t Survive Two More Years Of This
Remember those silent movies where the heroine is tied to the railway tracks or going over the waterfall in a barrel? Finance Minister Nicola Willis seems intent on portraying herself as that damsel in distress. According to Willis, this country’s current economic problems have all been caused by the spending ...4 days ago - Dragging our way towards the finish line, the end of this year can’t come soon enough for many…
Similar to the cuts and the austerity drive imposed by Ruth Richardson in the 1990’s, an era which to all intents and purposes we’ve largely fiddled around the edges with fixing in the time since – over, to be fair, several administrations – whilst trying our best it seems to ...5 days ago - Handling Democracy.
String-Pulling in the Dark: For the democratic process to be meaningful it must also be public. WITH TRUST AND CONFIDENCE in New Zealand’s politicians and journalists steadily declining, restoring those virtues poses a daunting challenge. Just how daunting is made clear by comparing the way politicians and journalists treated New Zealanders ...5 days ago
- Open letter to the Minister of Dwindling Finances
Dear Nicola Willis, thank you for letting us know in so many words that the swingeing austerity hasn't worked.By in so many words I mean the bit where you said, Here is a sea of red ink in which we are drowning after twelve months of savage cost cutting and ...5 days ago - Open Government: The joke ends
The Open Government Partnership is a multilateral organisation committed to advancing open government. Countries which join are supposed to co-create regular action plans with civil society, committing to making verifiable improvements in transparency, accountability, participation, or technology and innovation for the above. And they're held to account through an Independent ...5 days ago
- An unusual sort of press conference
Today I tuned into something strange: a press conference that didn’t make my stomach churn or the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Which was strange, because it was about the torture of children. It was the announcement by Erica Stanford — on her own, unusually ...5 days ago - This substack has talked about this government’s seeming corruption & pro-corporate issues...
This is a must watch, and puts on brilliant and practical display the implications and mechanics of fast-track law corruption and weakness.CLICK HERE: LINK TO WATCH VIDEOOur news media as it is set up is simply not equipped to deal with the brazen disinformation and corruption under this right wing ...5 days ago - NZCTU: Minister needs to listen to the evidence on engineered stone ban
NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi Acting Secretary Erin Polaczuk is welcoming the announcement from Minister of Workplace Relations and Safety Brooke van Velden that she is opening consultation on engineered stone and is calling on her to listen to the evidence and implement a total ban of the product. “We need ...5 days ago
- Wednesday 18 December
The Government has announced a 1.5% increase in the minimum wage from 1 April 2025, well below forecast inflation of 2.5%. Unions have reacted strongly and denounced it as a real terms cut. PSA and the CTU are opposing a new round of staff cuts at WorkSafe, which they say ...5 days ago
- Can the government change its mind on the ferries?
The decision to unilaterally repudiate the contract for new Cook Strait ferries is beginning to look like one of the stupidest decisions a New Zealand government ever made. While cancelling the ferries and their associated port infrastructure may have made this year's books look good, it means higher costs later, ...5 days ago
- Notes from Afar: Will Luxon Attend Waitangi Day? And Opposition Calls Out Nicola Willis for “C...
Hi there! I’ve been overseas recently, looking after a situation with a family member. So apologies if there any less than focused posts! Vanuatu has just had a significant 7.3 earthquake. Two MFAT staff are unaccounted for with local fatalities.It’s always sad to hear of such things happening.I think of ...5 days ago - Member’s morning
Today is a special member's morning, scheduled to make up for the government's theft of member's days throughout the year. First up was the first reading of Greg Fleming's Crimes (Increased Penalties for Slavery Offences) Amendment Bill, which was passed unanimously. Currently the House is debating the third reading of ...5 days ago
- Going Backwards
We're going backwardsIgnoring the realitiesGoing backwardsAre you counting all the casualties?We are not there yetWhere we need to beWe are still in debtTo our insanitiesSongwriter: Martin Gore Read more ...5 days ago - Blaming Treasury & Labour, Willis looks for even more Austerity
Willis blamed Treasury for changing its productivity assumptions and Labour’s spending increases since Covid for the worsening Budget outlook. Photo: Getty ImagesMōrena. Long stories short, the six things that matter in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Wednesday, December 18 in The Kākā’s Dawn Chorus podcast above ...5 days ago
- December-24 AT Board Meeting
Today the Auckland Transport board meet for the last time this year. For those interested (and with time to spare), you can follow along via this MS Teams link from 10am. I’ve taken a quick look through the agenda items to see what I think the most interesting aspects are. ...5 days ago
- The Making of a Mental Health Rockstar
Hi,If you’re a New Zealander — you know who Mike King is. He is the face of New Zealand’s battle against mental health problems. He can be loud and brash. He raises, and is entrusted with, a lot of cash. Last year his “I Am Hope” charity reported a revenue ...5 days ago - It could have been worse
Probably about the only consolation available from yesterday’s unveiling of the Half-Yearly Economic and Fiscal Update (HYEFU) is that it could have been worse. Though Finance Minister Nicola Willis has tightened the screws on future government spending, she has resisted the calls from hard-line academics, fiscal purists and fiscal hawks ...5 days ago
- The Deep Divisions of Local Government
The right have a stupid saying that is only occasionally true:When is democracy not democracy? When it hasn’t been voted on.While not true in regards to branches of government such as the judiciary, it’s a philosophy that probably should apply to recently-elected local government councillors. Nevertheless, this concept seemed to ...5 days ago - Willis’ austerity strategy just isn’t working
Long story short: the Government’s austerity policy has driven the economy into a deeper and longer recession that means it will have to borrow $20 billion more over the next four years than it expected just six months ago. Treasury’s latest forecasts show the National-ACT-NZ First Government’s fiscal strategy of ...6 days ago
- Sabin 33 #7 – Are solar projects hurting farmers and rural communities?
On November 1, 2024 we announced the publication of 33 rebuttals based on the report "Rebutting 33 False Claims About Solar, Wind, and Electric Vehicles" written by Matthew Eisenson, Jacob Elkin, Andy Fitch, Matthew Ard, Kaya Sittinger & Samuel Lavine and published by the Sabin Center for Climate Change Law at Columbia ...6 days ago
- Join us for a pop-up Hoon at 5pm on HYEFU
6 days ago - ‘Ideas Worth Saving’: A Call for Papers
Some years ago, I found myself pondering the power of literature to endure. Or at least the power of some of it to endure, while the rest vanishes in mere decades: https://phuulishfellow.wordpress.com/2019/08/07/look-on-my-works-ye-mighty-and-despair-the-literary-future/. I have similarly had fun with the subject in some of my short stories, such as Another Alexandria ...6 days ago - Corrections is torturing prisoners again
In 1998, in the wake of the Paremoremo Prison riot, the Department of Corrections established the "Behaviour Management Regime". Prisoners were locked in their cells for 22 or 23 hours a day, with no fresh air, no exercise, no social contact, no entertainment, and in some cases no clothes and ...6 days ago
- HYEFU and BPS data shows New Zealand is way off track
New data released by the Treasury shows that the economic policies of this Government have made things worse in the year since they took office, said NZCTU Economist Craig Renney. “Our fiscal indicators are all heading in the wrong direction – with higher levels of debt, a higher deficit, and ...6 days ago
- “Better economic management”
At the 2023 election, National basically ran on a platform of being better economic managers. So how'd that turn out for us? In just one year, they've fucked us for two full political terms: The government's books are set to remain deeply in the red for the near term ...6 days ago
- Shameless, clueless
AUSTERITYText within this block will maintain its original spacing when publishedMy spreadsheet insists This pain leads straight to glory (File not found) Read more ...6 days ago - Minimum wage ‘increase’ is an effective cut
The NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi are saying that the Government should do the right thing and deliver minimum wage increases that don’t see workers fall further behind, in response to today’s announcement that the minimum wage will only be increased by 1.5%, well short of forecast inflation. “With inflation forecast ...6 days ago
- Crazy ’bout a Sharp-dressed Man
Oh, I weptFor daysFilled my eyesWith silly tearsOh, yeaBut I don'tCare no moreI don't care ifMy eyes get soreSongwriters: Paul Rodgers / Paul Kossoff. Read more ...6 days ago - How much should you worry about a collapse of the Atlantic conveyor belt?
This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Bob Henson In this aerial view, fingers of meltwater flow from the melting Isunnguata Sermia glacier descending from the Greenland Ice Sheet on July 11, 2024, near Kangerlussuaq, Greenland. According to the Programme for Monitoring of the Greenland Ice Sheet (PROMICE), the ...6 days ago
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In August, I wrote an article about David Seymour1 with a video of his testimony, to warn that there were grave dangers to his Ministry of Regulation:David Seymour's Ministry of Slush Hides Far Greater RisksWhy Seymour's exorbitant waste of taxpayers' money could be the least of concernThe money for Seymour ...6 days ago - When austerity worsens public debt & cuts GDP
Willis is expected to have to reveal the bitter fiscal fruits of her austerity strategy in the HYEFU later today. Photo: Lynn Grieveson/TheKakaMōrena. Long stories short, the six things that matter in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Tuesday, December 17 in The Kākā’s Dawn Chorus podcast ...6 days ago
- Govt to double number of toll roads
On Friday the government announced it would double the number of toll roads in New Zealand as well as make a few other changes to how toll roads are used in the country. The real issue though is not that tolling is being used but the suggestion it will make ...6 days ago
- Luxon’s pre-emptive strike
The Prime Minister yesterday engaged in what looked like a pre-emptive strike designed to counter what is likely to be a series of depressing economic statistics expected before the end of the week. He opened his weekly post-Cabinet press conference with a recitation of the Government’s achievements. “It certainly has ...6 days ago
- Gordon Campbell On The Coalition’s Empty Gestures, And Abortion Refusal As The New Slavery
This whooping cough story from south Auckland is a good example of the coalition government’s approach to social need – spend money on urging people to get vaccinated but only after you’ve cut the funding to where they could get vaccinated. This has been the case all year with public ...6 days ago
- More public service contempt of parliament
Back in 2023 the New Zealand Council for Civil Liberties raised concerns about the inherent conflict of interest involved in public service agencies supporting parliamentary select committees. Our parliament is run on a shoestring, so depends on the public service for advice. But public service agencies work for Ministers, not ...7 days ago
- If There Is A God
And if there is a GodI know he likes to rockHe likes his loud guitarsHis spiders from MarsAnd if there is a GodI know he's watching meHe likes what he seesBut there's trouble on the breezeSongwriter: William Patrick Corgan Read more ...7 days ago - A Lipstick Government
Here’s a quick round up of today’s political news:1. MORE FOOD BANKS, CHARITIES, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SHELTERS AND YOUTH SOCIAL SERVICES SET TO CLOSE OR SCALE BACK AROUND THE COUNTRY AS GOVT CUTS FUNDINGSome of Auckland's largest foodbanks are warning they may need to close or significantly reduce food parcels after ...7 days ago - NZCTU open letter to Treasury on undue restrictions on restricted briefings
Iain Rennie, CNZMSecretary and Chief Executive to the TreasuryDear Secretary, Undue restrictions on restricted briefings This week, the Treasury barred representatives from four organisations, including the New Zealand Council of Trade Unions Te Kauae Kaimahi, from attending the restricted briefing for the Half-Year Economic and Fiscal Update. We had been ...7 days ago
- Why you won’t hear me advocate for electric cars
This is a guest post by Tim Adriaansen, a community, climate, and accessibility advocate. I won’t shut up about climate breakdown, and whenever possible I try to shift the focus of a climate conversation towards solutions. But you’ll almost never hear me give more than a passing nod to ...7 days ago
- Coalition forced to back down on tolling Pahiatua track
A grassroots backlash has forced a backdown from Brown, but he is still eyeing up plenty of tolls for other new roads. And the pressure is on Willis to ramp up the Government’s austerity strategy. Photo: Getty ImagesMōrena. Long stories short, the six things that matter in Aotearoa’s political economy ...1 week ago
- Thank You
Hi all,I'm pretty overwhelmed by all your messages and emails today; thank you so very much.As much as my newsletter this morning was about money, and we all need to earn money, it was mostly about world domination if I'm honest. 😉I really hate what’s happening to our country, and ...1 week ago - 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #50
A listing of 23 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Sun, December 8, 2024 thru Sat, December 14, 2024. Listing by Category Like last week's summary this one contains the list of articles twice: based on categories and based on ...1 week ago
- Making Gravy
I started writing this morning about Hobson’s Pledge, examining the claims they and their supporters make, basically ripping into them. But I kept getting notifications coming through, and not good ones.Each time I looked up, there was another un-subscription message, and I felt a bit sicker at the thought of ...1 week ago - Nothing here but the shadows
Once, long before there was Harry and Meghan and Dodi and all those episodes of The Crown, they came to spend some time with us, Charles and Diana. Was there anyone in the world more glamorous than the Princess of Wales?Dazzled as everyone was by their company, the leader of ...1 week ago - The United Right: the FSU’s Continued Efforts to Undermine Academia
The collective right have a problem.The entire foundation for their world view is antiscientific. Their preferred economic strategies have been disproven. Their whole neoliberal model faces accusations of corporate corruption and worsening inequality. Climate change not only definitely exists, its rapid progression demands an immediate and expensive response in order ...1 week ago
- Showing the Americans how to do it
Just ten days ago, South Korea's president attempted a self-coup, declaring martial law and attempting to have opposition MPs murdered or arrested in an effort to seize unconstrained power. The attempt was rapidly defeated by the national assembly voting it down and the people flooding the streets to defend democracy. ...1 week ago
- 2 Men, 1 Haircut
Hi,“What I love about New Zealanders is that sometimes you use these expressions that as Americans we have no idea what those things mean!"I am watching a 30-something year old American ramble on about how different New Zealanders are to Americans. It’s his podcast, and this man is doing a ...1 week ago
- National’s Greatest Misses 2023-4
National has only been in power for a year, but everywhere you look, its choices are taking New Zealand a long way backwards. In no particular order, here are the National Government's Top 50 Greatest Misses of its first year in power. ...3 days ago - Release: Minister’s plan for tertiary sector a backwards step
Returning to the model that was failing for most polytechnics and Institutes of Technology is not the answer. ...3 days ago
- Release: National buries 1019 planned homes
It’s been revealed that National has cancelled 60 percent of its housing projects planned before mid-2025 amidst housing woes. ...3 days ago
- Release: Rule-Czar bill a right-wing power grab
The Government is quietly undertaking consultation on the dangerous Regulatory Standards Bill over the Christmas period to avoid too much attention. ...3 days ago
- Release: Why not both? Luxon shuns Waitangi celebrations
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon is running away from problems of his own creation, with his decision not to go to Waitangi. ...4 days ago
- Govt’s ‘free speech’ legislation stokes fear, not freedom
The Government’s planned changes to the freedom of speech obligations of universities is little more than a front for stoking the political fires of disinformation and fear, placing teachers and students in the crosshairs. ...4 days ago - Release: Nicola Willis spirals country deeper into recession
The economy shrank 1% this quarter and New Zealand has tumbled into the depths of a recession of Nicola Willis’ making. ...4 days ago
- Release: Hikes for company directors but not ordinary Kiwis
Working people are going backwards while company directors are being given huge pay hikes. ...5 days ago
- ECE no place to cut corners
The Ministry of Regulation’s report into Early Childhood Education (ECE) in Aotearoa raises serious concerns about the possibility of lowering qualification requirements, undermining quality and risking worse outcomes for tamariki, whānau, and kaiako. ...5 days ago
- Release: Strengthening Justice Services for New Zealanders
A Bill to modernise the role of Justices of the Peace (JP), ensuring they remain active in their communities and connected with other JPs, has been put into the ballot. ...5 days ago
- Release: Labour will continue fight against destructive projects
Labour will continue to fight unsustainable and destructive projects that are able to leap-frog environment protection under National’s Fast-track Approvals Bill. ...6 days ago
- Green Government will revoke dodgy fast-track projects
The Green Party has warned that a Green Government will revoke the consents of companies who override environmental protections as part of Fast-Track legislation being passed today. ...6 days ago
- Government for the wealthy keeps pushing austerity
The Green Party says the Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update shows how the Government is failing to address the massive social and infrastructure deficits our country faces. ...6 days ago
- Release: Visa changes let migrant workers be paid less
The Government’s latest move to reduce the earnings of migrant workers will not only hurt migrants but it will drive down the wages of Kiwi workers. ...6 days ago
- Release: Nightmare before Christmas for Nicola Willis
With more debt and a larger deficit, Nicola Willis’ reputation is in tatters after her failure to return the Government’s books to surplus. ...6 days ago
- Warning to Fast-Track Applicants – ‘Exploit the Whenua, Face the Consequences’
Te Pāti Māori has this morning issued a stern warning to Fast-Track applicants with interests in mining, pledging to hold them accountable through retrospective liability and to immediately revoke Fast-Track consents under a future Te Pāti Māori government. This warning comes ahead of today’s third reading of the Fast-Track Approvals ...6 days ago
- Release: Govt cuts wages for lowest paid NZers… again
For the second year running, the government has effectively cut wages for the lowest paid workers in New Zealand. ...6 days ago
- Govt’s miserly 1.5% minimum wage will take workers backwards
The Government’s announcement today of a 1.5 per cent increase to minimum wage is another blow for workers, with inflation projected to exceed the increase, meaning it’s a real terms pay reduction for many. ...6 days ago
- Release: Govt shirking responsibility for rate hikes
All the Government has achieved from its announcement today is to continue to push responsibility back on councils for its own lack of action to help bring down skyrocketing rates. ...6 days ago
- Luxon’s ‘localism’ strikes again
The Government has used its final post-Cabinet press conference of the year to punch down on local government without offering any credible solutions to the issues our councils are facing. ...7 days ago
- Release: Govt breaks promise on EV chargers
The Government has failed to keep its promise to ‘super charge’ the EV network, delivering just 292 chargers - less than half of the 670 chargers needed to meet its target. ...7 days ago
- Greens call for end to subsidies for Methanex
The Green Party is calling for the Government to stop subsidising the largest user of the country’s gas supplies, Methanex, following a report highlighting the multi-national’s disproportionate influence on energy prices in Aotearoa. ...7 days ago
- Govt child poverty targets allow for increase in poverty
The Green Party is appalled with the Government’s new child poverty targets that are based on a new ‘persistent poverty’ measure that could be met even with an increase in child poverty. ...1 week ago
- Release: Four weeks annual leave under threat
The Government’s attack on workers continues with news it is scrapping work on the Holidays Act. ...1 week ago
- Govt’s emissions plan for measly 1% reduction
New independent analysis has revealed that the Government’s Emissions Reduction Plan (ERP) will reduce emissions by a measly 1 per cent by 2030, failing to set us up for the future and meeting upcoming targets. ...1 week ago
- Greens stand in solidarity with Whakaata Māori on sad day
The loss of 27 kaimahi at Whakaata Māori and the end of its daily news bulletin is a sad day for Māori media and another step backwards for Te Tiriti o Waitangi justice. ...1 week ago
- Sanctions regime to create more hardship for families
Yesterday the Government passed cruel legislation through first reading to establish a new beneficiary sanction regime that will ultimately mean more households cannot afford the basic essentials. ...1 week ago
- Govt gifts renters housing anxiety for Christmas
Today's passing of the Government's Residential Tenancies Amendment Bill–which allows landlords to end tenancies with no reason–ignores the voice of the people and leaves renters in limbo ahead of the festive season. ...1 week ago
- Release: National Party urged to support modern slavery legislation
Labour is urging the Prime Minister to walk the talk and support legislation combating modern slavery. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour has lost confidence in the Speaker
The Speaker of the New Zealand Parliament made an unprecedented decision on the government amendment to the Fast Track Approvals Bill last night. ...2 weeks ago
- One year on, still no progress on new ferries
Today’s announcement from the Government on its plan for new ferries throws more uncertainty on the future of the country’s rail network. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Nicola Willis’ smaller ferries will cost more
After wasting a year, Nicola Willis has delivered a worse deal for the Cook Strait ferries that will end up being more expensive and take longer to arrive. ...2 weeks ago
- Bill to sanction unlawful occupation of Palestine
Green Party co-leader Chlöe Swarbrick has today launched a Member’s Bill to sanction Israel for its unlawful presence in the Occupied Palestinian Territory, as the All Out For Gaza rally reaches Parliament. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour fully supports greyhound racing ban
The Government has done the right thing in moving to ban greyhound racing. ...2 weeks ago
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NZ’s next PM.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satire_boom
OMG: and to think that I thought you were a humorless troll.
That really is funny.
Post Mortem
“NZ’s next PM” “your’e dreaming!!” That’s a nightmare proposition!!
Pissed Moron?
“I’m not exactly sure what this glass is called, but I did overhear the barman talking about a mug.”
” I drink alone
yeah with nobody else….”
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4E9ydw_aDMg&w=560&h=315%5D
No mates National has no mates leader
They said I’m welcome to come outside when the BBQ is fired up. I think it’s powered by dry grass. Well, Judith did say something about a straw poll.
NZ Pub Etiquette #1. Every bar has one, never ever engage with the rooster settled in at the end.
“This is what John would do.”
Never mind the caption – I just wanted to point out what a horrible fucking shirt that is
LOL. Lots of comments on SB’s twitter feed asking why he is still wearing his pyjamas!
https://twitter.com/simonjbridges/status/1081778099283324930
“Cheers Jamie (Lee Ross), you’ve driven me to drink”
So true – Bridges rarely seems to take personal responsibility for anything. Its always someone else.
Look like he stole Rob Muldoon’s shirt 1/2 pint and beersies
Maybe he’s going to call a snap leadership vote.
Big Boy’s Beer, small boy’s shirt.
“See Nu Zullind I’m a real man, real men drink beer, drink it straight from the bottle (they wouldn’t let me) and we wear black singlets (they said I couldn’t), and we never let others tell us what we can or can’t do (yes Judith, right away).”
Warren being Trumped by a right winger. My bottles bigger. So biggly he needed a glass.
Simon needs a drink before doing attempting the breakfast club dance.
If I was doing this for real I would have filled my glass.
“If I was doing this for real I would have filled my glass.”
Weirdly, it looks like there is more beer in the handle than there is gone from the bottle. It’s almost like it’s totally staged.
Gee you are right. He can’t even drink a beer without staging it and failing!
Cheers, ms. I did a bit of a search and here are my findings.
It’s a 500 ml bottle, with over two thirds left. Most handles are between 440 and 560 ml. Simon’s one looks to be a larger one and it appears to be at least half full.
So either it’s fakeity fake fake fake or Simon is an alcoholic who cannot wait to finish his current drink before cracking open the next bottle.
Now, I cannot say for sure that the leader of the National Party is a drink sodden dipso, but I do think we should be told.
Freaking unable to organise a proper piss up in a brewery!
“It’s a 500 ml bottle….”
Are you sure, looks like a 750 ml, like the old swappa-crate ones (?)
Pretty sure it’s not a quart bottle. I had a look on a couple of wholesalers websites and stubbies and 500ml were the only options. However, happy to be corrected.
Yes you’re correct, sorry, just looked at their products online.
The Jamie he’s thanking.
https://untappd.com/b/emerson-s-brewery-mackaiser/1865170
Yes, I knew it wouldn’t be that Jamie, I was just being facetious.
Snap!
I was about to post that link as well. Pleased to see I was not the only ‘tragic’ who just had to track down the actual beer he was drinking.
Here is another Herald one in Oct 2017 with link to an audio of the interview explaining that:
“Last year (2016) The Country got together with Emerson’s brewery and came up with a delightful brew called The Mackaiser. The run was so popular that we’re doing it all again this year!
Jamie Mackay caught up with Emerson’s Head Brewer Jim Falconer and Sales and Marketing Manager Greg Menzies for an update on Season Two of The Mackaiser which is going to be bigger and bolder…you have been warned.
Sign up for The Country’s online newsletter and go in the draw to win an Emerson’s gift pack here.”
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/the-country/news/article.cfm?c_id=16&objectid=11931775
Seems that this brew is not widely available and is brewed for Jamie Mackay/The Country, so:
1. Was the beer a gift to Simon Bridges from Jamie Mackay and “The Country” (Newstalk ZB weekdays 12pm – 1pm )?
2. If so, will Bridges declare the gift in his 2019 Declaration of Pecunary Interests required under Parliamentary Standing Orders, under s.12 of the form requiring gifts and donations to be declared?
3. Will the contents of his form be leaked before the full 2019 Register of Pecunary Interests is made public mid-2019?
These and more questions remain to be answered in the turbulent months ahead …
Maybe it’s all a trick of camera lens, angle and perspective, like that pic of Key and Whitelock. Could be it’s really a smaller handle shoved close to the camera to make it look bigger, and the bottle is tucked in close to his left moob away from the camera so it looks smaller.
On the other hand, the one time I saw Key in person I was surprised at what a runt he was, so maybe not.
Stemless wine glass.
https://screenshotscdn.firefoxusercontent.com/images/4352f1a3-5d56-4f50-8415-2c24ef52d03a.png
Well spotted! What an idiot- him not you (she hastily adds …).
Staged? Surely not. Well spotted TRP.
I’ll do the maths.
The bottle.
It looks like the cone of the bottle is about 1/3 of its height. A cone has 1/3 of the volume of a cylinder of the same height. So the cone is 1 part (what’s used) and there’s 2 more equal height cylinders giving a total 7 parts of volume for the bottle. 500ml / 7 parts equals 71.4 ml.
So it looks like 71.4 ml is missing from the bottle.
The glass.
You can guess the original filling height by the foam ring of the glass. The glass is more of a cylinder than the cone shaped volume used in the bottle. So by height it has 3 times the volume (it changes Diameter so say its 2 times). The glass is at least, further from the camera. So the glass is at least (looks bigger) the same diameter of the bottle. The depth filled in or height in the glass looks the same as removed from the bottle.
So it looks like the glass has a minimum of 2 volumes of beer, or 142.8 ml.
Faked picture.
Wow…..you have too much time on your hands!
I admire the ability to do such maths personally. it’s a useful skill. As a farm worker, the shepherds would enlist my help in calculating the amount of chemical to go into an irregularly shaped sheep dip at a certain concentration.
Things earlier must have been haphazard and possibly ineffective, or overly expensive.
That was in the days before craft beer when Macs came onto the market and changed New Zealand. “You mean we can have a beer that actually tastes good at a reasonable price rather than commercial preparations made by industrial continuous fermentation processes, the most worthwhile product of which was the waste yeast that was made into Marmite?”
Maybe with this Labour government the same change can happen. “You mean we can have a government that actually works for the good of all providng reasonable services rather than a commercially-oriented kleptocracy the most worthwhile product of which was to run an ultimately futile exercise in flag changing?”
A shandy?
“A man well out of his time ”
Inspired by this from NZ Art parallels – Seated man 1939
@NZAHParallels
16h16 hours ago
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Simon Bridges having an @EmersonsBrewery beer / Willem de Kooning, Seated Man, 1939.
(Image: @simonjbridges )
#nzartparallels
https://twitter.com/NZAHParallels/status/1081793220814635009
Who is that a photo of, I don’t recognize him. Is he famous?
;-p
Ha! NZJ.
It’s Paula, with an unkempt rug.
Well, I woke up this morning, I got myself a beer
Well, I woke up this morning, and I got myself a beer
The future’s uncertain, and the end is always near
The Doors
“Where can I take a leak?”
Woman’s Day cover photo with caption,
“Simon on drinking his own urine for political survival.”
Bizarre but not the first time in NZ politics…
https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10760344
LMFAO Maui 🙂 brilliant.
Ouch!
Beer, my drug of choice, you can get it at the supermarket we made sure of that.
Brewskis! With my Mates!
Hmm … this home brew of Judith’s has a strange taste to it.
“the looser and liar of our decade”
“…but I didn’t swallow”
“Its not that I fear the Kiwi house Build, but I do keep count with each little house representing 100 the other lot have built. The little houses stretch right round the windowsill damn it. Get me another crate Honey.”
Brilliant. I had noticed the little houses but your comment is priceless in linking them in.
Laughed out loud!! That is funny ianmac.
sipping from the poisoned chalice that is leadership of National 🍼
Seeing that photo of SB has driven me to drink @ 10:54 Darwin time. Damm you SB, now where’s my Darwin Stubbie 😂.
trying to forget the latest leadership poll 😢
Simple Simon met a pieman
Going to the fair;
Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
“Let me taste your beer.”
Says the pieman to Simple Simon,
“Show me first your electoral mandate.”
Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
“Indeed, I have no friends.”
Great Ropata. But how sad. Poor old Simple Simon. But wait. Simon, Cuddly Judy will snuggle up to you with great sincerity. She really really believes in you. She does. She does.
Simple Simon met a pieman
Going to the fair;
Says Simple Simon to the pieman,
“what have you there.”
PIES CUNT………………
Working on his “Key-belly”.
All By Myself…
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kavu_vuD2QM&w=560&h=315%5D
edit: [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbn6o5tiPds&w=560&h=315%5D
Not a good look drinking on your own Simon … oh yes that’s right, you have no friends do you?
Poor poor Simon what you gonna do
Things are lookin’ bad so
What you gonna do …
( … Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat … with a relevant name change)
Drink Emerson’s and look like a dick !!!
How very national, rather than an actual kiwi craft brewer he chooses the product of a foreign owned brewer.
It’s as if he’s being setup by his own PR folk as that’s an ‘epic’ fail.
“Because Crosby-Textor told me to, that’s why.”
“I sent out the invites, and they said they might stop by if they had time……..they’ll be here soon.”
Great brew for a hot Sunday afternoon
Cos Ive done nothing to deserve it, I dont work like real kiwis
Shouldn’t work on a Sunday anyway- day of rest and all that- and especially on a hot Sunday…..
Though, smilin, you accurately point to the hidden message behind much of National’s messaging which goes “We deserve it because we are hard working; you are part of us so you deserve a beer, too. ‘They’, on the other hand who are poor, bludgers, beneficiaries, the ‘others’ from a different tribe, the unemployed, they don’t deserve a beer, or tax cuts, or salaries over a hundred times the minimum wage, two lane highways to ‘our’ holiday destinations or knighthoods.”
“Hard working Kiwis” is a modern version of ‘right-thinking people’ and ‘ordinary, decent New Zealanders” and is a justification for entitlement, prejudice and self-fulfilling puffery. It is a secular form of the religious belief that excuses the rich and justifies their hoarding of worldly goods saying that this wealth is a sign that the Almighty has blessed us because we are indeed righteous, and the poor must therefore be sinners and condemned.
Hallelujah!
the simon bridges xmas party was a sad lonely affair…
Hey! Only just saw this. Good to see you back.