ScoMo’s flying bus tour

Written By: - Date published: 8:28 am, November 8th, 2018 - 20 comments
Categories: australian politics - Tags:


In an effort to revive sagging support levels Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison is on a bus tour of Australia.  Except he is not.  The tour involves him flying from town to town, the bus picking him up, being driven somewhere, then getting off the bus and flying somewhere else as the bus is driven to the same place.

This caused this outstanding example of double speak at a recent Prime Ministerial stand up.  Read it and marvel at how rubbery the English language is.

JOURNALIST: Prime Minister, you’re on the bus tour. Why are you flying?

PRIME MINISTER: Well the bus is going all the way up to Rockie and that’s where it was always planning to go. I mean, it’s a big state and I need to cover as much of it in four days as I can. So we were never planning to take the bus to Townsville, we’d always planned to take that last leg up to Townsville by plane because that was the most effective way to get there and to spend the most time there with people on the ground. I mean, these visits aren’t about sitting on a bus. They’re about actually engaging with small businesses and our supporters and the people of Queensland and listening to them.

JOURNALIST: Then why have the bus?

PRIME MINISTER: Because it gets me from A to B.

JOURNALIST: Will you be taking the bus to Rockhampton from here?

PRIME MINISTER: Yes. The bus will be going to Rockhampton from here. That’s right.

JOURNALIST: With you on it?

PRIME MINISTER: I’ve got to get there earlier than the bus tonight.

JOURNALIST: So you will be flying to Rockhampton?

PRIME MINISTER: I’ll get into Rockhampton tonight and I’ve got a programme tonight in Rockhampton and the bus can’t get me there quick enough so I’ve got to fly.

JOURNALIST: So you’ll be flying to Rockhampton and the bus will catch up with you and then you’ll fly onto Townsville?

PRIME MINISTER: I’ll be flying onto Townsville. And your point is what?

JOURNALIST: I’m just interested in the point of the bus if you’re not on it.

PRIME MINISTER: I am on it, I just got off it.

JOURNALIST: But not onto Rockhampton or Townsville?

PRIME MINISTER: Yeah well it’s a practical thing. I want to spend as much time on the ground with Queenslanders, and when I can be on the bus and go from place to place on the bus, that’s great. But I’m not going to sacrifice time with Queenslanders, listening to them and hearing them and talking to them about what’s important to them just to satisfy the media’s interest in the timetable for the bus.

He has also been drinking lots of beer.

And more beer.

And wearing fair dinkum Australian made hats.

Although people are getting tired of the news from the tour.

And on the interwebs people are having fun with the bus.

And this one.

Someone even made this great gif.

And they may want to rethink the colour used.

Hopefully this will not work. If it does prepare for Australian politics to become even more inane than it is now.

20 comments on “ScoMo’s flying bus tour”

  1. Ross 1

    At least he doesn’t eat a pie with a knife and fork. 🙂

    And I think the banner on the bus should read “19 fewer Nazis…” or am I just a grammar Nazi?

  2. Classic bullshit politician. Must be time for the next one to take the hot seat.

  3. Bill 3

    So Morrison has bought the rights to Clark and Dawson material?

    If Clark was still alive, I suspect he’d be really struggling to satirise the level of shit on display in that interview.

    I mean, when politicians offer up a straight faced reality that outsatirises satirists…what d’we call that?

    • Drowsy M. Kram 3.1

      Spot on Bill – the opening question sounds like a Dawe classic:

      “Prime Minister, you’re on the bus tour. Why are you flying?”

      And the entire interview is priceless; so easy to imagine the voices of Clark and Dawe delivering these lines.

    • Paul Campbell 3.2

      If Clarke were still alive he would have simply performed it verbatim …

  4. adam 4

    Every get the feeling the hard right are out of ideas?

    Another tour, another waste of taxpayers money.

    • Draco T Bastard 4.1

      Every get the feeling the hard right are out of ideas?

      They’re all conservatives and think that everything was fine a few decades/centuries ago and thus we don’t need any new ideas.

  5. Bill 5

    Holy hell. I clicked through to the piece the quoted excerpt come from – and honestly? – I was looking around the page for an indication the entire thing was a piss-take.

    The “split election” thing threw me. (I did a quick google to find what that was about and so now understand that “splitting the election” isn’t a cunning plan to run a vote splitting third candidate type thing.)

    But then there was also this after the “Beefys Pies” infomercial intro…the same Beefys pies that…well, as the PM said – “I know Ron isn’t feeling quite that well today so he’ll be home watching the Cup.”

    JOURNALIST: We had a shark attack overnight. Do we need a shark cull?

    PRIME MINISTER: They’re matters that I’ll leave for the state government.[…]

    JOURNALIST: You’re from Tourism Australia…

    PRIME MINISTER: No, I’m the Prime Minister.[…]

  6. A 6

    The NSW blue comment was a bit lost on me so I had to look it up. State of Origin… Right, its been awhile. At least he didn’t wear their cap.

  7. indiana 7

    Maybe he got his travel planning ideas from this guy:

  8. Lucy 8

    So when does the front fall off the bus?

  9. soddenleaf 9

    Voters elected a PM, not the right of the liberal party. huff said.

  10. tc 10

    This will probably end for ScoMo similar to how it’s possibly going to end for bridges….rolled after an election defeat. Soimon may not even get that far.

    Oz have had a gutful of the liberals infighting and the fact these pollys aren’t reflecting the views of the electorate. Scomo’s the compromise backroom deal PM and about as inspiring as a sock puppet….these things count in a GE cycle.

    The unisex marriage vote showed how out touch they are, especially this fundamental christian schtick certain MP’s have got going on. Looking at you Tony !

    The electorates sick of this single issue crap from MP’s who should reflect the electorate view rather than their own personal dogma and also the inaction on climate change.

  11. Morrissey 11

    Australian politicians are the lowest of the low….

    “In Canberra last week I met some Australian members of parliament. It gave me hope, because until I heard them speak I had always thought that Israel’s right wing politicians were the worst. —-(LAUGHTER)— I’ve never heard any Israeli politician speak about the Palestinian people the way that those Australian politicians did. But they are Australia’s problem, not mine. (LAUGHTER) I spoke with the Australian foreign minister; she talked and she was very nice but we could not agree on anything. (LAUGHTER)”

    —-Israeli journalist Gideon Levy, speaking in Auckland, Dec. 3, 2017

    • tc 11.1

      Look at how the boat people are being treated is it any wonder.

      • Morrissey 11.1.1

        Gideon Levy was aghast at their ignorance. I would not be surprised to learn that Julie Bishop—she was the Australian foreign minister he spoke to—believed the boats were full of armed ISIS terrorists.

  12. Dorothy Bulling 12

    Would have been sensible to take note of the troubled waters our Bridges is in just now after a similar jaunt around New Zealand to let voters know who he is. Watch out for the eventual fallout from his trip.

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