Stink line

Written By: - Date published: 7:55 am, March 26th, 2009 - 10 comments
Categories: same old national, spin - Tags:

polar_bear_global_warming-1Now “PC gone mad” has been used to the point where even people who think mimicking Tui’s “yeah right” slogan is cutting edge irony wouldn’t be seen dead using the phrase, National has needed to come up with something else to do the job. Because let’s face it, you need to keep creating the impression the public service is woolly liberal claptrap so voters won’t complain when you start a slashin’.

Problem is the best National could come up with is “hug a polar bear programmes”. Say that out loud and you’ll hear the first problem. It doesn’t scan, it’s long and it’s not catchy.

Now have a think about it. Hug a polar bear. Everybody likes polar bears. They’re simultaneously cute and fluffy and powerful and tough. They tick all the boxes for cool. You wouldn’t want to hug one for real but the idea of hugging one is quite attractive.

But it gets worse. The only example Key gives for such “polar bears” is the carbon neutral public service policy. That’s just dumb. Nothing says “evil climate change” like the stories of polar bears facing extinction and by noting that carbon policy in relation to polar bears Key is only underscoring the fact that his government doesn’t care about climate change or the environment in general. D’oh!

Of course they’ll still cut perfectly good services but if they keep this embarrassingly poor level of spin up they won’t have softened the blowback one bit.

“Hug a polar bear”? That stinks John. Let’s hope you keep using it.

10 comments on “Stink line ”

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  1. BLiP 1
    26 March 2009 at 8:26 am

    The National Party policy towards the country’s public service is rather like “clubbing baby seals”. I think I would rather hug a polar bear than do that. No, really.

    • Jarvis Pink 1.1
      26 March 2009 at 12:22 pm

      You suggest the perfect bar-stool riposte BLiP!

      National sympathiser regurgitates meme and attacks “hug a polar bear” policies. Leftie draws attention to National’s “club a baby seal” policies aimed at selfish economic gain at the expense of compassion and fairness. ownpetardhoistage hopefully ensues.

  2. Ianmac 2
    26 March 2009 at 9:57 am

    Perhaps John Key could hug a polar bear to show how dumb that would be.
    After all, polar bears get pretty angry because they are really bi-polar bears.

  3. Matthew Pilott 3
    26 March 2009 at 11:21 am

    Irish, I think you overestimate this line. I compare it to the obvious ‘hug a tree programmes’, and think “tree hugging – I can see what they mean there – it’s a bit silly when take literally”.

    Hug a polar bear…what is that meant to invoke? Some form of environmental suicide? Hari-kari on ice?

  4. IrishBill 4
    26 March 2009 at 11:39 am

    Matt, I don’t overestimate it at all. It’s a dumb line and Kevin should be ashamed of himself for making John look stink. The fact Farrar is hard-out spruiking it over at the bog is a good sign it’s an official line.

  5. Felix 5
    26 March 2009 at 1:00 pm

    Say that out loud and you’ll hear the first problem. It doesn’t scan, it’s long and it’s not catchy.

    John isn’t going to notice that though, is he? To him it’s just like any other sentence of more than 4 syllables.

    Also, have you noticed how they’ve got him on a “word-a-week” vocabulary program? Every week or two they give him a new word or phrase (not the official lines, this is John’s own special ed program) that he has to use as often as possible to make him seem just a little bit smarter.

    Last week’s phrase was “the former or the latter” which he had a bit of trouble with at first and you could hear the gears grinding as he reminded himself which was which, but by the end of the week he was using it as easily as any 12 year old.

    Points will be awarded for spotting this week’s remedial language excersise.

  6. Felix 6
    26 March 2009 at 5:32 pm

    Oh and also, polar bears totally rule. They’re just the coolest animals ever, no question.

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