Top 10 reasons why Key’s visiting New York
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- Date published:
12:13 pm, August 28th, 2009 - 31 comments
Categories: humour -
Tags: letterman, top 10
10. I got lost on my way to Afghanistaniania.
9. It’s much more fun than running the country.
8. Textes from Kevin Taylor told me to.
7. I’ve got some National Park lignite to sell.
6. I’m on safari, hunting the elusive scuttlebug.
5. My contract with Crosby-Textor requires I do 3 meaningless PR stunts a month to keep up my affability ratings.
4. It might be enough to bump the latest ministerial cock-up off the frontpage.
3. I’m having a joint birthday party with my old mate Barack.
2. Umm, chocolate?
1. I’m unveiling plans for a New York to Bluff cycleway.
31 comments on “Top 10 reasons why Key’s visiting New York ”
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National’s all pain approach to beneficiaries has yielded no gain as benefit numbers continue to surge past projected figures. ...3 weeks ago
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Tēnā koutou Nau mai haere mai ki tenei hui Thank you to Vice Chancellor Williams, and the University of Western Sydney, for inviting me to speak today. I speak to you today in my capacity as Attorney-General – the New Zealand Crown’s Senior Law Officer. In this capacity, I serve ...7 days ago
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Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A,DIV,A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Tuesday 5 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...2 hours ago
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11. Confirm my right to a kighthood
“what’s your biggest weakness Mr Key”
“ahhhh, ohhh, I don’t know… chocolate?”
brilliant.
I hadn’t seen that video before. He’s so damn slippery.
Hehehehe – excellent! Just what I needed to cheer up an otherwise dull Friday afternoon. Thanks.
Couldn’t believe Duncan “doughnut” Garner’s excitable little boy’s piece on TV3 about this – fingers crossed the Goober doesn’t make a complete twat of himself, or breaks his arm walking off stage.
Not like he hasn’t fallen off the stage before …. want that when he was head of the labour government
12. An axcuse to visit the bach in Hawaii.
What is wrong or funny about owning a bach in Hawaii.
Zenetic’s list is quite funny but I dont really get your punch line
13. Well what did you think I meant by “Minister of Tourism”?
I just hope that tampon doesn’t embarrass us too much. How sad to have him as our representative to the world. It’s depressing.
Was that the real John Key or the impersonator?
The sad thing is I like the impersonator better he just seems more real!
14. Spending some time back on Wall Street to get back to his roots. Because, y’know you’ve got to remember where you come from if you want to keep it real.
To avoid Judith Collins shopping for shipping containers in Gdansk.
15 http://www.nzpaimages.co.nz/events.php?event_id=8662
I know they say new MPs gain weight but, man, she’s getting more spherical by the day.
Is Paula reely reely driving a car like that, or is it a Photoshop?
16. Bill said i could have another holiday. Nice guy Bill but he works too hard. Can’t even work out what he’s spending his tiem on myself.
17. To visit his good friend Helen
I think you’ve got 3. wrong. Should be…
3. I’m having a birthday party joint with Barrack (not, I’m having a joint birthday party).
He bloody looks half-droop-eyed near all the time.
Tell you though – in my neck of the woods people think he is the bee’s knees. Even sensible people…
Sensible people think that abouy Key? Are they sharing birthday joints?
1 should read .
To get my next set of instructions from my bosses @ the Federal Reserve. The Rothschilds. They’ve been the father I’ve always wanted,and were so generous and helpful in kickstarting my political career.
1. I cant stand rodney hide
2. I’ve had a gutsful
3. i need to check my diversified assets
4. cheaper coke
5. roger kerr and roger douglas really me piss me off
6. the hicks here dont appreciate my subtility
7. can you ask a more pesific question please
8. its not approreeit
9. calling on my broker
10. got lost on the subway
To avoid having to see this as he travels through Waitakere on his way from his Helensville office to Auckland airport.
She better not go on a safari she might be mistaken for an obese leopard and get shot.
Goodness me, if ever there were any doubt about how personally Labour voters have taken losing to the National Party and how deep their resentment is that they’re not going to get back into power anytime soon, then this thread proves it.
Or option (b), it is posted under humour for a reason.
It’s Friday and after 5, have a beer.
Wow, you must be a hoot at parties, Tim.
I think you’ll find that not every poster here is a Labour voter, Tim. But we share a sense of humour and a dislike of a pompous, vacuous twat who is constantly condescending to us.
Oh, and we don’t like John Key much, either.
Certainly not me TVoR.
I haven’t voted Labour since we got Rogered between 1984 and 1990 by a Labour government. But I suspect Tim wants more of that.
Do you want a cuddle mate? Just you seem a bit upset.
Maybe you would prefer that we were calling him a Nazi, a dictator and comparing him to Mugabe in ugly street protests whipped up by foreign-funded orgs like sensible sentencing and family first?
Is tourism NZ paying for Key’s appearance on Letterman and how much is it costing? What will Letterman announce him as ? “Flight of the conservatives” New Zealands 4th most popular prime ministerial folk act.
11. Brush up on my “denialist without being a denialist” spin.
10: To promote New Zealand to a massive audience
9: To work on trade deals
8: To position New Zealand as a main player at the U.N
7: Prime Ministers do travel overseas.
6: To show Helen what a real man is like.
5: To Jam with Paul Schafier
4: To cheer on Sean Marks against the Knicks.
3: To get away from all the bitching commie hippys
2: To met President Obama
1: To become the third concord.
Sorry they were lame, in fact the only funny one in this whole thread is Bobo’s one.