Andrew Little: the night before budget
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4:38 pm, May 20th, 2015 - 29 comments
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Working people are going backwards while company directors are being given huge pay hikes. ...5 days ago
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A Bill to modernise the role of Justices of the Peace (JP), ensuring they remain active in their communities and connected with other JPs, has been put into the ballot. ...5 days ago
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Labour will continue to fight unsustainable and destructive projects that are able to leap-frog environment protection under National’s Fast-track Approvals Bill. ...6 days ago
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The Green Party has warned that a Green Government will revoke the consents of companies who override environmental protections as part of Fast-Track legislation being passed today. ...6 days ago
- Government for the wealthy keeps pushing austerity
The Green Party says the Half Year Economic and Fiscal Update shows how the Government is failing to address the massive social and infrastructure deficits our country faces. ...6 days ago
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The Government’s latest move to reduce the earnings of migrant workers will not only hurt migrants but it will drive down the wages of Kiwi workers. ...6 days ago
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With more debt and a larger deficit, Nicola Willis’ reputation is in tatters after her failure to return the Government’s books to surplus. ...6 days ago
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For the second year running, the government has effectively cut wages for the lowest paid workers in New Zealand. ...6 days ago
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The Government’s announcement today of a 1.5 per cent increase to minimum wage is another blow for workers, with inflation projected to exceed the increase, meaning it’s a real terms pay reduction for many. ...6 days ago
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All the Government has achieved from its announcement today is to continue to push responsibility back on councils for its own lack of action to help bring down skyrocketing rates. ...6 days ago
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The Government has used its final post-Cabinet press conference of the year to punch down on local government without offering any credible solutions to the issues our councils are facing. ...7 days ago
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The Government has failed to keep its promise to ‘super charge’ the EV network, delivering just 292 chargers - less than half of the 670 chargers needed to meet its target. ...1 week ago
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The Green Party is calling for the Government to stop subsidising the largest user of the country’s gas supplies, Methanex, following a report highlighting the multi-national’s disproportionate influence on energy prices in Aotearoa. ...1 week ago
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The Green Party is appalled with the Government’s new child poverty targets that are based on a new ‘persistent poverty’ measure that could be met even with an increase in child poverty. ...1 week ago
- Release: Four weeks annual leave under threat
The Government’s attack on workers continues with news it is scrapping work on the Holidays Act. ...1 week ago
- Govt’s emissions plan for measly 1% reduction
New independent analysis has revealed that the Government’s Emissions Reduction Plan (ERP) will reduce emissions by a measly 1 per cent by 2030, failing to set us up for the future and meeting upcoming targets. ...1 week ago
- Greens stand in solidarity with Whakaata Māori on sad day
The loss of 27 kaimahi at Whakaata Māori and the end of its daily news bulletin is a sad day for Māori media and another step backwards for Te Tiriti o Waitangi justice. ...1 week ago
- Sanctions regime to create more hardship for families
Yesterday the Government passed cruel legislation through first reading to establish a new beneficiary sanction regime that will ultimately mean more households cannot afford the basic essentials. ...1 week ago
- Govt gifts renters housing anxiety for Christmas
Today's passing of the Government's Residential Tenancies Amendment Bill–which allows landlords to end tenancies with no reason–ignores the voice of the people and leaves renters in limbo ahead of the festive season. ...1 week ago
- Release: National Party urged to support modern slavery legislation
Labour is urging the Prime Minister to walk the talk and support legislation combating modern slavery. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour has lost confidence in the Speaker
The Speaker of the New Zealand Parliament made an unprecedented decision on the government amendment to the Fast Track Approvals Bill last night. ...2 weeks ago
- One year on, still no progress on new ferries
Today’s announcement from the Government on its plan for new ferries throws more uncertainty on the future of the country’s rail network. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Nicola Willis’ smaller ferries will cost more
After wasting a year, Nicola Willis has delivered a worse deal for the Cook Strait ferries that will end up being more expensive and take longer to arrive. ...2 weeks ago
- Bill to sanction unlawful occupation of Palestine
Green Party co-leader Chlöe Swarbrick has today launched a Member’s Bill to sanction Israel for its unlawful presence in the Occupied Palestinian Territory, as the All Out For Gaza rally reaches Parliament. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour fully supports greyhound racing ban
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That is so good, so perceptive and so very funny!
I snorted at the Judith Collins reference!
I would like to read the words. Do any of you have it?
I laughed at the reference to (The Honest and Honourable) John Key, the Parnell hair puller, (The Honest and Honourable) Judy Collins, the contender for Key’s job, and (The Honest and Honourable) John Banks (the innocent living saint) possibly getting compensation!
Will put up Hansard as soon as I see it.
Found it on the Labour party website:
http://campaign.labour.org.nz/twas_the_night_before_the_budget
Twas the night before the Budget
When all through the House.
The National Back Benches were keen for a stoush
The promises were hung during the election with care
Of course they would fill them
How could they not
They wouldn’t dare.
September 14 was a different time
The Back Benchers quite happy, some in their prime.
Nestled all snug in their leather armchairs
John, Bill and Steven washed away all their fears
There had been promises of surpluses, of poverty relieved
Of great fiscal wonders, or so they believed.
“They’ve got us this far, the Back Benchers said”
“What could possibly go wrong?”
“We’re so far ahead!”
But Bill English knew, he just hid his fear
That all their good words were just plain hot air
It was great that Mike Hosking and Paul Henry were glowing
But nothing could mask an economy slowing.
“We have to do something, we have to be quick”
Said John Key to his Cabinet that had run out of tricks.
“Now Bennett, now Adams, Now Bridges and Tolley
Forget Steven Joyce and his conventional folly.
Where’s woodhouse, McCully, Crosbey and Textor
If there’s one thing clear – you all have to do better.
I need plans to help Auckland, to slow housing prices
To help feed the kids, and fix other vices.
Where is the plan for trains, trucks and bikes.
My Facebook page tanking, I can’t get no likes.”
“And I’m sick of seeing Andy, the new man about town
He never gets angry, we can’t bring him down”.
Bill English stepped forwarded in canonical mood;
“Just stop there John, I don’t mean to be rude
You may not have noticed, but we have a crisis
And it’s nothing to do with our troops fighting ISIS
Exports are diving, dairy is down
There isn’t much happening in any small town
I know I have said the problem’s inflation.
But there’s something much bigger – John Bank’s compensation.
You said don’t touch taxes, levies and fees
But how will we pay for this – it don’t grow on trees.”
And then the talk came to a stop with a shudder
The Prime Minister knew –his heart now aflutter
Up from the back came a great throaty roar
Judith Collins appeared on Parliament’s floor.
“I’ve heard all of your talk, me and Todd Muller
All you’re known as now is ponytail puller”
“Out of the way – shove this in your gob
I’m here to take over, it’s my turn in your job.”
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That is the sound of a leader, and his party, comfortably on the front foot.
Comment from political reporter Edwards on evening RNZ.
“By hammering the National “failures” National will be pleased because the Opposition has successfully reduced the public expectations of the voters.” (paraphrased)
Perhaps a slight giving by the Budget will cause some voters to think National are not too bad after all. Bugger!
Brilliant!
Will it be on the 6 oclock news???????
No!!!!!!!
It was on the TV3 news website however
“‘Twas the night before budget and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.”
Andrew reminds me of the hero(?) of this fairy tale, particularly the last line that seems to describe him quite well.
http://www.enchantedlearning.com/rhymes/Littlemouse.shtml
Just me that finds this a wee bit chummy and….wrong?
He must keep his (and our) enemies close, Bill.
Give the man a go. Nothing wrong with Andrew showing he’s no less human than any of us. Lighten up.
A couple of weeks ago an elderly Labour supporting Glaswegian visited the Glasgow library. He asked the young woman behind the “information” counter, ” de ye have any books on suicide?”.
” Fock off””, she said, ” ye won’t bring it back”.
That’s actually amusing.
Like I say, it may well just be me, but with an institutional adversary (Tories, bosses etc) Scathing humour – yes. Merciless put downs – yes. Gentle ‘bantering’ – nah.
No point in going hard out when theres bugger all on the other side listening.
Loosen up Bill.
The media reported it.
The media have reported on Andrew not tweaking my funny bone!? Jeesus wept!!!
ok you win.
and stuff pulled out an Editorial just short of man-love between Key and English. I say just short cos only Key is quoted, not English, which I think makes a mockery of what the editorial is trying to paint.
Great stuff!!!
Geddoverit Bill. That was fun! And perceptive! Bet you would be rolling on the floor laughing if it was key.
nope
and dunno where you get that idea from
What’s that got to do with the suggestion I’d be “rolling on the floor laughing if it was key”?
Poetic justice? Beautifully captured all that is disgraceful about the current government and delivered with wit, love it.
No labour fan here – But (despite not agreeing with the content), I thought it funny and well done.
I’m sure this would have gone down well at a student union meeting or at teachers college but from the 2nd placed leader of the opposition?
Not as bad as this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GGfmZ85Y7I but still cringe worthy
Warning. Link goes to Whale Oil’s youtube account. It’s footage of some MP’s singing at a conference, coupled with the usual attacks on Helen Clark.