Caption contest
Written By:
- Date published:
1:58 pm, December 10th, 2014 - 85 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour -
Tags:
The normal rules apply. Keep it seemly …
85 comments on “Caption contest ”
- Comments are now closed
- Comments are now closed
CommentsOpinions
Recent Comments
FeedsPartyGovtMedia
- Summer in the City
Go out and find a girlCome on, come on, and dance all nightDespite the heat it'll be alrightAnd babe, don't you know it's a pityThat the days can't be like the nightsIn the summer, in the citySong: John Sebastian, Mark Sebastian, Steve BooneThank YouTo begin today, a thank you. Yesterday, ...32 mins ago - The Bewildering World of Chris Luxon – Playing Politics in Glass Houses
..Thanks for reading Frankly Speaking ! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.By now we’re all aware of Mike King’s comments regarding use of alcohol to self-medicate mental health problems. On NewstalkZB, King stated:“Alcohol is not a problem for people with mental health issues. It’s actually the ...1 hour ago - Seymour’s Shaky Response To Earthquake Claims
Audio interview from RNZ with Community Board member Ali Jones. If you don’t live in Christchurch, and haven’t for the past fifteen years, you probably have a different understanding of the words “EQC” to what we do. For most people, EQC is the scheme they don’t think about that much, ...1 hour ago - Dealing to the climate crisis
Fire and flood, heat-waves and rivers of rain. Climate change is impacting us powerfully. Major floods in Auckland, Hawkes Bay, Germany, India, the US…Huge forest fires in Australia, Canada, Greece, California….Intense heat waves in Spain, Italy, Greece, India, the US…. And we haven’t spoken of melting glaciers and ice-caps, rising ...1 hour ago - Don’t Move
2024, directed by Adam Schindler & Brian Netto The title of Don’t Move is somewhat evocative of Don’t Breathe, another fairly successful horror movie. I haven’t actually seen Don’t Breathe but have it on my “someday if there’s nothing more interesting available” list, and the premise of Don’t Move is ...2 hours ago - Auckland’s 2025 PT Fare Increases
Public transport fares are about to increase again, by an average of 5.2%, according to a paper to Auckland Council’s Transport, Resilience and Infrastructure Committee on Thursday by Auckland Transport. In addition, AT are going to be removing off-peak discounts and implementing some other structural changes to the fare system. ...3 hours ago - Health Officials say Casey Costello’s Advice is “Crap” & Luxon Refuses To Prot...
Ngā mihi maioha. A tremendous thank you to all who commented, supported and read my recent post. In appreciation.First, an update on the Prime Minister’s press conference yesterday with Stanford - rounding up the 3 key messages you may have missed.1. ERICA STANFORD FOR THE GOVERNMENT OF NZ SPREADS MISINFORMATIONEducation ...5 hours ago - Hell no
When do you know that a big international news story might be looking like An Historic Moment? When it gets a bunch of utterly superfluous New Zealand reporters inserted into it.I've been sympathetic to our media fretting about hanging on by a thread, but each time they despatch their microphone-holders ...19 hours ago - Sabotaging justice
One of the achievements of the Labour-led government was the establishment of the Criminal Cases Review Commission in 2019. After decades of high-profile miscarriages of justice, and judges looking the other way on state conspiracies of silence and each other's fuckups, we finally got an outside body to cast an ...20 hours ago - Mike King and the Free Market
I was two sentences in (and stuck on) a defence of Mike King, where I was going to highlight that he was merely the well-carved figurehead of a neoliberal-shaped problem that neither begins nor ends with him, when I stumbled across a most interesting article about corporate propaganda being disseminated ...20 hours ago - Volunteer activity: Evaluate automated climate misinformation debunkings
A new challenge and a new opportunity for research AI-generated disinformation threatens to make debunking climate misinformation even more challenging, swamping already scanty capacity. We are exploring ways to counter this burgeoning flood of harm by employing the same tools now employed by malefactors as a force for good. We've already published research ...20 hours ago - Don’t Lux-Speak
Don't speak, I know just what you're sayin'So please stop explainin'Don't tell me 'cause it hurtsDon't speak, I know what you're thinkin'I don't need your reasonsDon't tell me 'cause it hurtsSongwriters: Eric Stefani / Gwen StefaniDo you remember the first time you encountered Corporate Speak? Important-sounding buzzwords used to camouflage ...23 hours ago - Budget cuts penny wise & pound foolish
Kia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Monday, November 4: Budget cuts are storing up costs for future taxpayers and Governments. Scoop of the day: The Government is set to deliver another budget-cutting blow for ...1 day ago - A Fresh Horizon for Greater Auckland
A few months ago we asked for your help, and you answered. Thanks to the generous support we received, you may have noticed a more consistent and diverse stream of content over the last few months – which is in large part due to us being able to pay for ...1 day ago
- 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #44
A listing of 35 news and opinion articles we found interesting and shared on social media during the past week: Mon, October 28, 2024 thru Sun, November 3, 2024. Topics covered this week Here are the main topics and the media outlets where they appeared in: Climate Change Impacts ...1 day ago
- Hey, I Need Your Help
For those of you who are new here, I’m Mountain Tui.National Geographic imageI’m the one that first started badgering NZ about Atlas Network - and it went mainstream easily from that: from Mihirangi Forbes asking David Seymour about it, to David Seymour and Chris Bishop lying, to the evidence easily ...2 days ago - Official Flightless Bird T-Shirts!
Hi,It’s a big election in three days. Like me, you’re probably sick of hearing about it, but like it or not — what America does tends to trickle down everywhere else. America farts and we’re all under the sheet being hotboxed against our will.I’ll do a fresh Webworm on election ...2 days ago - All I Ever Am
I lose all my life like thisReflecting time and memoriesAnd all for fear of what I'll findIf I just stop and empty out my mindOf all the ghosts and all the dreamsAll I hold to in beliefThat all I ever amIs somehow never quite all I am nowLyrics Robert Smith.Today’s ...2 days ago - The Book of Evidence-based-evidence
Now, in the land of leaky buildings and the Warehouse-where-everyone-gets-a-bargain, there came an electionAnd this was the one known as the show-bloody-Labour-the-bloody-door electionAnd there came into this election the one known as ChrisAnd of fresh thought or original idea, Chris was full emptyBut this was all good broFor Chris was ...2 days ago - Fact brief – Are most glaciers growing?
Skeptical Science is partnering with Gigafact to produce fact briefs — bite-sized fact checks of trending claims. This fact brief was written by Sue Bin Park from the Gigafact team in collaboration with members from our team. You can submit claims you think need checking via the tipline. Are most glaciers ...3 days ago
- It’s not (just) about the economy, stupid.
In 1992 James Carville, Bill Clinton’s lead strategist, hung a sign on the wall of the Democratic candidate’s campaign office in Little Rock, Arkansas. It had three lines on it to focus the team on the key vote-swinging issues and one of those lines would become so famous it’s turned ...3 days ago - Let’s Make Things Better
If you're down and out and you feel really hurtCome on over to the place where I workAnd all your loneliness, I'll try to sootheI'll play the blues for youLyrics: Albert King.Often, in these newsletters, I tell you about what is wrong. You know the sort of thing - oh ...3 days ago - Floating a few ideas
3 days ago - Our Thousand-Year Struggle Over Technology and Prosperity
A new book challenges how we need to think about technological innovation.Last week’s column mentioned the three 2024 Nobel laureates in economics. The column focused only on the 2012 book Why Nations Fail by Daron Acemoglu and James Robinson with little reference to Simon Johnson, although the three have worked ...3 days ago - Rebutting 33 False Claims About Solar, Wind, and Electric Vehicles thanks to the Sabin Center for Cl...
Earlier this year our volunteer editor Marc Kodack spotted an impressive answer to climate change solutions denial, "Rebutting 33 False Claims About Solar, Wind, and Electric Vehicles," which he included in our weekly climate research survey. Written by Matthew Eisenson, Jacob Elkin, Andy Fitch, Matthew Ard, Kaya Sittinger & Samuel ...4 days ago
- An expert walks into a bar
Quiz1. On what study was Mike King basing his assertion that Alcohol is not a problem for people with mental issues. It’s actually the solution ?a. Klein, Sawyer, Chomsky et al; Harvard, 2002b. Black Brown and Bleu; Yale, 1999c. Bloomfield, Verall, Ardern et al, Otago 2022d. Homer, Lenny, Carl and ...4 days ago - The High Court says “Land Back”
Way back in 1839, the New Zealand Company bought the area that is now Nelson from local iwi and hapu. As part of the deal, they promised that Māori would retain their homes, fields, and burial grounds, and that in addition, 10% of the land in the planned township and ...4 days ago
- US military-industrial-sports complex.
A US friend of mine wrote on social media about attending a Homecoming football game at her niece’s Red State university. Although the referees stunk and her team lost, my friend said that she enjoyed her visit, especially the halftime … Continue reading ...4 days ago - The Hoon around the week to November 1
The podcast above of the weekly ‘Hoon’ webinar for paying subscribers on Thursday night features co-hosts & talking about the week’s news with:The Kākā’s climate correspondent on the latest climate news, including research showing the lethality of gas hobs and research on the health effects of climate ...4 days ago - ‘Get ready for more landlord buying’
The RBNZ sees the potential for a spike in demand from landlords. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāKia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Friday, November 1: The RBNZ has warned the Government’s tax changes ...4 days ago - Alcohol and Mental Health
4 days ago - Weekly Roundup 1-November-2024
Wow, we’re in November already and it’s a Friday so welcome to another round-up of interesting stories about what’s happening in Auckland and other cities. Feel free to add your links in the comments! This post, like all our work, is brought to you by a largely volunteer crew and ...4 days ago
- A Mysterious Sound
Hi,Thanks for all your feedback to Hayden Donnell’s fantasy of communal living. “Camping in summer is really the only time I get to experience village life and I love it so much,” said Michelle. “You’ve infuriated me by writing the article that’s been in my head only much better than ...4 days ago - Toxic positivity and toxicity in the kitchen
Long stories short, here’s the top six news items of note in climate news for Aotearoa this week, and a discussion above between Bernard Hickey and The Kākā’s climate correspondent Cathrine Dyer:A study looking at psychological distress associated with climate change has stimulated discussion about the insistent demands for ‘hope’ ...4 days ago
- Geoffrey Miller: New Zealand’s breakthrough free trade deal with the Gulf
New Zealand’s new free trade agreement with the Gulf Cooperation Council is a major win for both sides. Todd McClay, New Zealand’s trade minister, announced the long-awaited deal on Thursday with his counterparts in Doha, Qatar. It is a remarkable, yet also surprising sudden success: the genesis of the agreement ...4 days ago - Todd McClay wins breakthrough for women in Saudi Arabia
In a major international breakthrough, New Zealand has negotiated a free trade agreement with Saudi Arabia and other Arabian Peninsula countries, which includes a provision requiring them to uphold the UN Convention on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women. Trade Minister Todd McClay signed the agreement in Doha overnight. The ...4 days ago - Gordon Campbell on America’s fear of foreigners
Mike King’s latest comments about the relationship between alcohol and mental health – according to King, alcohol does more good than harm – raises red flags once again about this organisation, and the quality of the “counselling” it provides. Here’s what the scientific research says. The latest example of King’s ...5 days ago - Skeptical Science New Research for Week #44 2024
Open access notables Communicating the most accurate and reliable science on climate change to society: A survey of editors from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, Molina & Abadal Abadal, Geoscience Communication: This study focuses on the perspectives of scientists involved in the IPCC AR5 and AR6 synthesis reports, examining ...5 days ago
- Gumboot Friday’s Founder Says Drugs and Alcohol Is A “Solution”
This afternoon, I turned to the fellow sitting near me and called out:“Guess what? A guy who runs a charity for mental health just said alcohol is a solution!”And his eyes popped out…his mouth opened ajar.That gave me some satisfaction - only because this person has zero care when it ...5 days ago - What can you do about bad journalism?
Day after day of David Seymour being accorded media time and attention like he’s doing this stuff in good faith and advancing these ideas in earnest. Come on. He’s a cosplaying libertarian who is really just a glove puppet for anti-democratic capitalist pigs. Read more ...5 days ago - A collapse in police legitimacy
Last week, the government had a big wank about police raids in Ōpōtiki, crowing about "gangs" and "drugs" and "law and order". Unfortunately the police did exactly the same shit they did in the Urewera terror raids 17 years ago, dragging people off in front of their kids and terrorising ...5 days ago
- 2024 Reading Summary: October (+ Writing Update)
No, I haven’t vanished from the Internet. Or died. Completed reads for October: The Castle of Otranto, by Horace Walpole The Sidereal Messenger of Galileo Galilei, by Galileo Galilei and Johannes Kepler Jurgen, by James Branch Cabell A very quiet reading month, and a very quiet writing month ...5 days ago - Suicide Rates Continue To Climb (Because We Are Not Treating Suicidal Patients)
Our suicide rates are skyrocketing again, and I’m going to spare you the faux-shock I could put on here, given that it would be frankly more surprising to me if our death toll had gone in the other direction. Preliminary data from 2023-24 shows that our annual suicide deaths have ...5 days ago - Are We The Baddies?
Difficult Questions: Does denying human equality and rejecting the principles of colour-blind citizenship place you among the baddies? Yes, I’m afraid it does.THE DEMON OF UNREST documents the descent of the United States into civil war. The primary focus of its author, Erik Larson, is the period of roughly five months ...5 days ago - Thursday 31 October 2024
Health and safety campaigner Sonya Rockhouse has come out in support of the joint open letter from the NZCTU, Business NZ and others. A new Xero Small Business Insights report shows that small businesses are cutting staff and keeping wages low, while the Salvation Army’s State of the Pacific Peoples ...5 days ago - Today’s Political Roundup – From Health to Self-Certification Risks
The focus on budgets is "going to cripple the health system".1. Cardiac specialist quits, saying Dr Lester Levy, the Part Time Health Commissioner, is "living in La La Land" and has no idea what's happening on the groundDr Dean BoddingtonDr Boddington, an electrical cardiologist, was the only person who did ...5 days ago - A deliberate and unnecessary crash landing
Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāKia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Thursday, October 31: US and European GDP growth figures overnight show the world’s largest economies, along with that of our nearest neighbour Australia, ...5 days ago - Seymour: Swastikas OK
Race hatred cannot stop usThis one thing we knowYour poll tax and Donald TrumpGreed has got to go!You’re bound to loseYou fascists bound to lose.Original Lyrics: Woody GuthrieThere are a lot of things this government doesn’t like. Te Reo - got to go, they said, it’s too confusing for our ...5 days ago - Sumbission: Have Your Say on Work Health and Safety
Health and safety is core union mahi. Unions recognise that health and safety is a fundamental aspect of good work, and that every worker has the right to work that is safe and healthy, and to have a voice on the operation of their work. In this submission on MBIE’s ...5 days ago
- The hidden health toll of hurricanes
This is a re-post from Yale Climate Connections by Neha Pathak Disasters can disrupt medical care both during and long after the event. (Photo credit: U.S. Air National Guard / Sgt. Jorge Intriago) Weeks after Hurricanes Milton and Helene tore paths of destruction across the Southeast, pictures of communities ...5 days ago
- First section of Te Ha Noa Opens
Something definitely worth celebrating is the opening of the first section of Te Hā Noa, the Victoria St Linear Park. As we highlighted eight years ago, this project is vital for helping move the thousands of people that will pour out of the Te Waihorotiu station once the CRL opens. ...5 days ago
- Boldness be my friend
When Nicola Willis gave the annual Finance Minister’s speech to the country’s top public servants last week, what she said must have landed like a bomb. “Now is the time for your best and boldest ideas,” she said at the Institute of Public Administration (IPANZ) event. Coming from a minister ...5 days ago
- Wednesday 30 October 2024
The NZCTU has joined with Business NZ and health and safety groups to call on the Government to drop its plans to reform health and safety law. The Postal Workers Union is opposing a plan to reduce rural postal deliveries from five to three days a week. The Government has ...6 days ago
- Yer doin it all wrong mate
Reader Jeff Howell is the best kind of social media friend to have. When there's outrage and denunciation needed he’s in there dishing it with verve; and when those storms pass you get happy Jeff, sharing his projects. His projects are awesome.Until a week or so ago it was a ...6 days ago - Out Of Sympathy.
6 days ago
- Two States – But No Solutions.
My Enemy’s Enemy Is My Friend: Mohammad Amin al-Husseini, the former Grand Mufti of Jerusalem, at the opening of the Islamic Central Institute in Berlin, December 19, 1942. The elimination of the Jewish state has been the unwavering ambition of successive generations of Palestinian leaders.AMIDST ALL THE HORROR of the Israel-Hamas War, ...6 days ago
- NZ For Sale: Chris Luxon Is Concierge To The Wealthy
Watching a Christopher Luxon press conference is a masterclass in gaslighting. You just know what he’s saying is disingenuous - if not outright deceptive and lies - but out he comes - with confidence and vigour - telling me black is white, and white is red.According to the Prime Minister, ...6 days ago
- Will banks & insurers back self-consented homes?
Kia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Wednesday, October 30: The Government’s move to allow qualified builders, plumbers and drainlayers to self-consent their work faces potential hurdles from reluctant insurers and bankers wanting protection against ...6 days ago
- Ātahu from Moana Maniapoto
We are blessed in Aotearoa with certain people that you might call National Treasures—those with great talents and a strong affinity for this place they are the custodians of. It’s not an official list; the people you think of might differ from those I think of.What are the attributes of ...6 days ago - Henderson Station Upgrade but will it Improve Customer Experience
Over the long weekend rail shutdown a new project got underway, an upgrade to Henderson station but the plans highlight that improving the customer experience by making it easier to use public transport is not a part of Auckland Transport’s agenda.
...
6 days ago - Climate Adam: Is climate change fuelling mega hurricanes?
This video includes conclusions of the creator climate scientist Dr. Adam Levy. It is presented to our readers as an informed perspective. Please see video description for references (if any). From hurricanes like Helene and Milton, to typhoons like Gaemi, vast storms are causing devastation: destroying cities and tearing up lives. ...6 days ago
- Get in the sea, old mate
For the State Highway One traveller, some sights remain dramatic no matter how many times you see them: Wellington harbour opening out at the bottom of Ngauranga Gorge; the first glimpse of Ruapehu; three quarters of the South Island. Also: the moment when you reach the top of the Brynderwyns and ...7 days ago - Taking the piss again
Remember Casey Costello? The government's most ignorant Minister? First she was referred to the Chief Archivist after claiming that key advice on her cancer promotion policy had simply magically appeared on her desk one day, and that she had no idea where it came from. Then, when the Ministry of ...7 days ago
- Monthly Employment Data shows weakness in economy
Monthly employment data released today by Statistics New Zealand showed our continuing labour market weakness, and particularly challenging conditions for young working people, said NZCTU Te Kauae Kaimahi Economist Craig Renney. “There are 21,000 fewer filled jobs than this time last year, and the fall has been led by those ...7 days ago
- Copy of Rwanda’s Kagame: from Saviour to Tyrant?
Is Rwanda turning into a country that seeks regional dominance and exterminates its rivals? This is a contention examined by Dr Michela Wrong, and Dr Maria Armoudian Dr Wrong is a journalist who has written best-selling books on Africa. Her latest, Do Not Disturb. The story of a political murder ...1 week ago
- We’ve got issues
1 week ago - ‘Happy to watch your grandkids grow up in Australia via WhatsApp?’
Globally, NZ has the second-highest share of its population living overseas permanently, many of them now permanently in Australia. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāKia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Tuesday, October 29: A ...1 week ago
- October-24 AT Board Meeting
Today the Auckland Transport board meet again as a whole for the first time in two months. AT note: Members of the public are welcome to join the meeting via Teams. Please note, due to technical difficulties, the video feed will be unavailable. However, attendees will still be able to view ...1 week ago
- The fourth article of the Treaty
While Parliament struggles with David Seymour’s Treaty Principles Bill, a Christian scholar and some heavyweight mainstream church leaders have developed a different perspective on the Treaty of Waitangi. Theologian Alistair Reese presented a petition to Parliament’s Petitions Committee on Thursday asking Parliament to legislate to recognise the oral agreement “4th ...1 week ago
- Gordon Campbell on why so many young males like Donald Trump
To foreigners, the fact that so many millions of Americans are buying the used and poisonous goods that Donald Trump is selling is an unfathomable mystery. However, some clues to the allure of Trumpism can be found in the gender gap of unprecedented size that has opened up between those ...1 week ago
- Building a Safer Future for Every Worker
Every New Zealander deserves a workplace that puts safety and wellbeing first. Too often, we’ve seen the real cost of a system that doesn’t fully protect workers. Lives are lost, families grieving, and communities bearing the burden of preventable tragedies. That’s why, alongside Business New Zealand, the New Zealand Institute ...1 week ago
- Not all authoritarians are fascists.
A few days ago I responded to a post about Trump being a fascist on one of my friend’s social media page, then made a few comments on the consultancy social media page by way of follow up. Given the … Continue reading ...1 week ago
- Keep the Vampires From Your Door
I'll protect you from the hooded clawKeep the vampires from your doorWhen the chips are down I'll be aroundWith my undying, death-defying love for youEnvy will hurt itselfLet yourself be beautifulSparkling love, flowersAnd pearls and pretty girlsLove is like an energyRushin' an' rushin' inside of me, ehSongwriters: Brian Philip Nash ...1 week ago - The Odd Couple.
Strange Political Bedfellows: Matthew Hooton’s support for Winston Peters’ New Zealand Futures Fund reflects the Radical Right’s newfound reluctance to bet everything on the efficacy of market forces.AS IF HE WASN’T IN ENOUGH TROUBLE, Matthew Hooton has now come out for Winston Peters’ New Zealand Futures Fund (NZFF). Not only ...1 week ago
- Your Friends Should Be Close By
Hi,I’ll never forget the time the guy next to me on the plane got really angry because the Wi-Fi wasn’t working. Here we were, 40,000 feet in the air, and he couldn’t get Facebook. He was huffing, he was puffing. He was insufferable.I’m constantly amazed you can get the internet ...1 week ago
... 
- Release: Government’s disgrace for Christchurch homeowners
The Government is backtracking on existing commitments to do the right thing by homeowners let down by EQC (now the Natural Hazards Commission). ...21 hours ago - Release: National’s FamilyBoost a colossal flop
Nicola Willis continues to over promise and under deliver, with most families receiving only $30 a week from National’s flagship FamilyBoost flop. ...22 hours ago
- Ngarewa-Packer Demands Support for Palestine Ceasefire from New Plymouth Mayor
Te Pāti Māori Co-Leader and MP for Te Tai Hauāuru, Debbie Ngarewa-Packer is calling on the Mayor for New Plymouth, Neil Holdom, to do the right thing. “I am shocked at his decision to disregard the petition presented by Palestine Solidarity Taranaki calling for an immediate and permanent ceasefire”, said ...1 day ago
- Release: Trade deal with Gulf states welcomed
Labour welcomes the conclusion of a trade deal with the Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) that was restarted under a Labour government after languishing for many years. ...1 day ago
- Release: Labour welcomes OAG fast track inquiry
The Government should consider the outcome of an Auditor-General report into conflicts of interest before progressing the Fast track Approvals Bill through Parliament. ...1 day ago
- Greens reignite call for free dental
A new report detailing the enormous social and economic costs of our dental system has reignited the Greens' call for free dental care. ...1 day ago - Greens call for bottom trawling ban and call out Minister for lacklustre response
The Green Party is urgently calling on the Government to ban bottom trawling, following news a New Zealand bottom trawler caught 37kg of coral in international waters, prompting the suspension of all fishing in the area until 2026. ...4 days ago
- Mark Patterson: Farmers understand we have their backs
Spring is here which means the start of the A&P show season. Those treasured community days where town meets country. There's no rural-urban divide here, just a chance to meet up with family and old friends and celebrate all things that make rural New Zealand so special. I'm embarking on ...5 days ago - Release: Funding for Gumboot Friday should pause
The National Government should review its support for Gumboot Friday after unacceptable comments by its leader and champion Mike King. ...5 days ago
- Louise Upston cherry-picks data to punch down on the poor
The Government has very conveniently cherry-picked data from the latest MSD projections to justify its cruel agenda and punch-down policy when it comes to people living in poverty. ...5 days ago
- Luxon needs to address the cow in the room
The Green Party was appalled to hear Prime Minister Christopher Luxon claim we are “doing everything we can” on climate change, while his government does nothing to address emissions in our most polluting sector. ...7 days ago
- Govt Must Clean Up ‘Its Shit’ From Sunken HMNZS Manawanui
Te Pāti Māori is calling out the Government and New Zealand Defence Force (NZDF) for their inaction and disgraceful downplaying of the impact caused by the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa. “We demand the Government move without further delay to clean up its shit from the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa,” said co-leader Debbie ...1 week ago
- Jamie Arbuckle: Inquiry into Banking Competition
This week was the start of the bank inquiry hearings into banking competition. The inquiry was confirmed in the NZ First/National Coalition agreement. 140 submissions were received on the inquiry, and we will hear from over 60 submitters including all the major banks. ANZ, New Zealand's largest bank, was first ...1 week ago
- Tanya Unkovich: It’s time to start the debate on palliative care as a ‘right’
There is one topic that is the great human leveller, and that is of death and dying. One day, we will all have to face it, and I am of the belief that being able to pass away with grace and dignity is a vital, basic, human right. How we ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour backs Christchurch City Council sanctions on Israel
Labour is backing Christchurch City Council’s decision not to do business with firms involved in Israel’s illegal settlements in the Occupied Territories. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Government driving away offshore wind industry
The Government has created a hostile environment for companies seeking to build offshore wind farms. ...2 weeks ago
- Another step towards Pasifika justice
The Green Party acknowledges the historical importance of MP Teanau Tuiono’s Member’s Bill, Restoring Citizenship Removed By Citizenship (Western Samoa) Act 1982 Bill, passing its second reading in Parliament today. ...2 weeks ago
- Sanctions Soar, Jobs Vanish – National’s Cruelty Exposed
Te Pāti Māori is enraged at the National government’s ruthless punishment of beneficiaries, all while jobs are disappearing. MSD data shows a 133% increase in sanctions over the past year, with over 14,000 sanctions in just three months. The kicker? The jobs this government insists people should find are nowhere ...2 weeks ago
- Police Perpetuate Siege on Ōpōtiki
Te Pāti Māori MP for Waiariki, Rawiri Waititi, says today’s police-sponsored terrorism in Ōpōtiki is a continuation of the State’s predatory behaviour towards the iwi of Te Whakatōhea. "Ōpōtiki is once again being intentionally targeted and is the direct byproduct of this Government’s 'tough on crime' legislative changes,” said MP ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Govt cuts school lunches even further
The Government has gone back on its word and cut the full school lunch programme in primary schools after saying it wouldn’t. ...2 weeks ago
- Time to shut down failed Youth Justice Residences
The Green Party is calling for Youth Justice Residences to close, following a protest in which a group of young people spent the night on the roof of an Oranga Tamariki justice facility. ...2 weeks ago
- Tell Luxon to Kill the Treaty Principles Bill
Te Tiriti o Waitangi is our country’s founding document. It forms the basis of the relationship between Māori and the Crown – and the Aotearoa New Zealand we live in today. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Appalling process on three strikes law
The Government is subverting parliamentary process on laws the evidence already shows don’t work. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour calls for investigation into tobacco tax cut
The Government’s decision to award a $216 million tax break for Philip Morris’ heated tobacco products reeks of tobacco industry interference and needs to be thoroughly investigated. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Delay to retirement village review won’t help residents
The National Government is treading water on a much-needed review of the Retirement Villages Act, kicking any amendments down the road till the next parliamentary term in 2027. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Serious concerns ignored in Govt’s fast track bill
National’s fast track bill enables the most radical and unbalanced consenting regime in living memory. ...3 weeks ago
- Fast-Track, off the rails: Submitters show strong opposition to Bill
Despite resounding public opposition, the fast-track legislation is being pushed through Parliament with provisions that could have real consequences for people and planet. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Labour supports continuing fight for dairy access
Labour welcomes the National Government’s decision to further pursue our access to the Canadian dairy market under the Comprehensive and Progressive Agreement for Trans-Pacific Partnership (CPTPP) ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Job losses devastating for Timaru
Confirmed news that the Smithfield meatworks will close is devastating for the hundreds of people who work there, Timaru and the wider region. ...3 weeks ago
- New Zealand First Member’s Bill to Improve Access to Palliative Care
New Zealand First has introduced a Member’s Bill which aims to improve access to palliative care for all New Zealanders, ensuring kiwis have better access to the compassionate palliative support they may need. The ‘Improving Access to Palliative Care Bill’ seeks to guarantee that every New Zealander has the right ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Further uncertainty for Kiwirail as jobs set to go
KiwiRail offering voluntary redundancy to all its staff is hugely concerning given the future of New Zealand’s rail system is under threat. ...3 weeks ago
- ASA Declares Hobson’s Pledge Advertising Misleading and Socially Irresponsible
Te Pāti Māori Co-leaders Rawiri Waititi and Debbie Ngarewa-Packer welcome today’s ruling from the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA), which found that a Hobson's Pledge advertisement regarding customary marine titles was misleading and socially irresponsible. The two-page wraparound ad, published in The New Zealand Herald, suggested that nearly the entire coastline ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Benefit numbers continue to soar under National
National’s all pain approach to beneficiaries has yielded no gain as benefit numbers continue to surge past projected figures. ...3 weeks ago
- Casey Costello: What Once Was…
Entering politics is a privilege afforded to very few and, as the saying goes, with great power comes great responsibility. Being an MP is a call to service. Whatever your politics you have a duty to show up. Whatever your party's policy, you have made a promise to those who ...3 weeks ago
- Soaring benefit sanctions push more into poverty
Sanctions on beneficiaries have sky-rocketed since the Coalition Government came to power, pushing more families into poverty. ...3 weeks ago
- International Energy Agency issues wake-up call on climate action
Today’s report from the International Energy Agency highlights how far this Government’s actions are dragging us backwards in the fight against climate change. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Lack of funding puts pressure on frontline Police
News that 173 roles are being cut at Police will only put more pressure on the frontline. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Bipartisan agreement on outdated marriage law
Changes to outdated relationships legislation has passed its third reading giving family violence survivors the power to quickly dissolve abusive marriages. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Cuts to Apprenticeship Boost will fail future NZ
The Government’s cuts to the Apprenticeship Boost programme will leave New Zealand without the workforce it needs to build homes, schools and hospitals. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Sluggish economy means struggles ahead for Kiwis
While today’s inflation numbers are good news for Kiwis, there are still struggles ahead with rising rents, rates, insurance and high unemployment. ...3 weeks ago
- Stats show Medsafe accelerates approval assessments
Associate Health Minister David Seymour says that Medsafe’s annual performance statistics released today show that Medsafe are accelerating their approval process. “The data produced in Medsafe’s annual statistics show that in 2023/2024 Medsafe expedited their assessment process for almost every category of medicine,” says Mr Seymour. For innovative new medicines ...55 mins ago - New rules mean faster payment times for small businesses
New requirements for government agencies to pay their invoices faster and adopt labour-saving technology are an important part of our plan to rebuild the economy and support small businesses, Small Business and Manufacturing Minister Andrew Bayly and Economic Development Minister Melissa Lee say. “The Government is ambitious about lifting New ...1 hour ago
- Speech – Diwali 2024
Namaste. Namaskar. Namaskaram. Vanakkam. Sat Sri Akal. Kem chho. Greetings to you all. It is my great privilege, as Minister for Ethnic Communities, to host this year’s Diwali Celebration at Parliament. I am truly excited to be with you all for Diwali as your Minister, and I warmly welcome each ...18 hours ago
- Accelerating maths achievement for Kiwi kids
The Government is continuing to transform maths education, by trialling a targeted maths acceleration programme to give more Kiwi kids confidence in mathematics. “After discovering just 22 per cent of Year 8 students are at the expected standard for maths, we launched our Make it Count Action Plan to give our ...18 hours ago
- Government’s creative sector strategy released
The Government’s creative sector strategy is designed to increase Kiwis’ engagement with culture and creativity and to boost its economic contribution, Arts Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “Amplify has been released for public consultation and I encourage people to read the strategy and to share their feedback. “There’s an opportunity to ...1 day ago
- On-sold programme changes bring resolution to homeowners and taxpayers
Associate Finance Minister David Seymour has asked the Natural Hazards Commission (NHC) to make changes to how it delivers the On-sold support package to prevent a cost blowout while helping eligible homeowners repair their homes in a timely manner. The On-sold programme was set up by the Government in 2019 ...1 day ago
- Todd McClay to lead large trade mission to China
Trade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay will lead a large trade delegation to the 7th annual China International Import Expo (CIIE) in Shanghai next week, followed by a visit to Guangzhou. This year, almost 70 New Zealand companies will participate in CIIE, to interact with over 3,400 exhibitors and 410,000 visitors. “This ...2 days ago
- New Charter to guarantee better access for hunting and fishing
Minister for Hunting and Fishing Todd McClay has today launched an Access Charter (the Charter) to ensure better access for recreational hunting and fishing on public conservation land (PCL) across New Zealand. “This Charter establishes guiding principles for the Department of Conservation (DOC) to provide clear and transparent decisions on ...3 days ago
- Pou Whenua blessing honours Tongariro
A beautiful new Pou Whenua at the beginning of the Tongariro Alpine Crossing will introduce visitors to the sacred landscape they are entering, says Conservation Minister Tama Potaka. Mr Potaka attended a blessing for the specially carved Pou Whenua at Mangatepopo, at the start of the track on 1 November. ...4 days ago
- New members appointed to the NZTA Board
Transport Minister Simeon Brown has today announced two new appointments to the New Zealand Transport Agency (NZTA) Board. Mary-Anne Macleod and Mike Rudge have both been appointed as members for three-year terms commencing 1 November 2024 and ending 31 October 2027. “Transport is a critical part of our Government’s plan ...4 days ago
- Welcome relief from new oestradiol gel funding
Associate Health Minister David Seymour is welcoming Pharmac’s funding of oestradiol gel, following global shortages of oestradiol patches earlier this year. “I’m well aware of the stress caused by the global shortage earlier this year. At the time I said I was confident Pharmac was working hard to find a ...4 days ago
- Deputy Prime Minister visit to Australia
Foreign Minister and Racing Minister Winston Peters will visit Australia next week. “Australia is New Zealand’s closest partner, and we are pleased to make this second official visit there for 2024 following the first ever Foreign and Defence Ministers 2+2 Meeting between our two countries in Melbourne in January,” ...4 days ago
- Applications now open for new training pathway
Applications have now opened for tertiary education organisations to seek Government funding to develop New Zealand’s first postgraduate diploma programme for associate psychologists, Minister for Mental Health Matt Doocey announced today. “Investment in this new training pathway supports the Government’s target to grow our mental health and addiction workforce and ...4 days ago
- Increased medicines access continues following budget boost
Associate Health Minister with responsibility for Pharmac David Seymour is pleased to see further increased availability of medicines for Kiwis following the Government’s increased investment in Pharmac. “Pharmac operates independently, but it must work within the budget constraints set by the Government,” says Mr Seymour. “When this Government assumed office, ...4 days ago
- New Zealand concludes high quality trade deal with the Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC)
New Zealand and the six-nation Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) have concluded negotiations on a trade agreement that will open up significant opportunities for New Zealand exporters in the Gulf region, Minister for Trade and Agriculture Todd McClay announced from Doha today. Today’s announcement follows significant reengagement with the GCC following meetings ...5 days ago
- Government seeks views on remote court attendance
The Government is exploring how to modernise the law around people attending court remotely, to support access to justice and enhance court performance. Courts Minister Nicole McKee says the current law has not kept up with evolving court practices and public attitudes to the use of remote technology, nor been ...5 days ago
- Breast screening age extension begins in Nelson Marlborough
Free breast screening has been extended for 70 to 74-year-old women living in the Nelson Marlborough district, ahead of a national roll-out late next year, Health Minister Dr Shane Reti announced today. “Breast cancer is the most common cancer in New Zealand with about 3,400 women diagnosed with the disease ...5 days ago
- Te Māori Manaaki Taonga Trust Board strengthened
He toi whakairo, he mana tangata. The reappointment of one trustee and the appointment of four new trustees to the Te Māori Manaaki Taonga Trust Board will enable the legacy of Te Māori to be carried forward into the future, Māori Development Minister Tama Potaka and Arts Minister Paul Goldsmith ...5 days ago
- Affordable housing project supporting home ownership
Up to 300 affordable, healthy, community-tailored homes helping to support home ownership are set to be built in eastern Porirua, supported by Government funding for Our Whare Our Fale through the Building Homes for Pacific in Porirua initiative, Minister for Pacific Peoples Dr Shane Reti and Associate Housing Minister Tama ...5 days ago
- Dire benefit forecasts show the need for Welfare that Works
A new report that forecasts young people on benefits will spend an average of 20 more years relying on welfare underscores the need for the Government’s reforms, Social Development and Employment Minister Louise Upston says. MSD’s latest Benefit System Insights report, released today, which estimates how many future years different ...5 days ago
- Trade Minister travels to Doha for GCC trade discussions
Trade Minister Todd McClay will hold trade discussions with Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) trade ministers in Doha this week. Minister McClay will meet with all six GCC Trade Ministers, as well as the GCC Secretary General. “This will be my seventh visit to the region this year including two Ministerial ...6 days ago
- Podiatry prescribers will boost patient care
Health Minister Dr Shane Reti and Associate Minister David Seymour say it’s great news that podiatrists will soon be able to prescribe medicines, meaning patients with painful foot and leg conditions don’t have to make a separate trip to the doctor. “This simple step means a big change for people ...6 days ago
- Historic redress inequities finally resolved for Lake Alice Unit survivors
The Government is addressing historic redress inequities for some survivors abused at the Lake Alice Child and Adolescent Unit. In 2001, the Crown reached a $6.5 million group settlement with 95 survivors subjected to abuse at the Lake Alice Unit. Law firm Grant Cameron & Associates (now GCA Lawyers) represented ...6 days ago
- ERO report shows Government’s truancy emphasis is vital
Associate Education Minister David Seymour says that the Education Review Office’s (ERO) timely report on chronic school absence released today is further evidence of a truancy crisis. “Chronic absence has doubled since 2015. This report reinforces that action is needed to ensure this generation reaches its full potential,” says Associate ...6 days ago
- Minister welcomes business view on AML
Associate Justice Minister Nicole McKee welcomes BusinessNZ’s report which addresses reducing the compliance burden on small businesses. “The challenges outlined in the report released today echo many of the concerns I have heard from businesses, which have informed my Anti Money Laundering/Countering Financing Terrorism (AML/CFT) priorities,” she says. “I have ...7 days ago
- Mangamuka Gorge opening in time for Christmas
State Highway 1 through the Mangamuka Gorge will be open for Christmas, with critical work currently underway to clear the large slips and dropouts that have caused significant disruption for Northlanders trying to get where they want to go quickly and safely, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. “The Mangamuka Gorge ...7 days ago
- Trusted building professionals able to self-certify
The Government is proposing further significant action to reform the building and construction sector to support more affordable homes and a stronger economy, Building and Construction Minister Chris Penk says. “If we want to grow the economy, lift incomes, create jobs and build more affordable, quality homes we need a ...7 days ago
- New appointments to the TEC board
Dr Alan Bollard CNZM and Mr Bharat Guha have been appointed to the Tertiary Education Commission (TEC) board, Tertiary Education and Skills Minister Penny Simmonds says. “I would like to welcome the two new members joining the TEC board,” Ms Simmonds says. “Dr Alan Bollard CNZM is an experienced public ...7 days ago
- Move to fast-track overseas doctors welcomed
Fast tracking applications for registration by eligible specialist doctors wanting to practice in New Zealand is in line with the Government’s push to improve the health outcomes for New Zealanders, Health Minister Dr Shane Reti says. This fast-track pathway applies to specialists trained in anaesthesia, dermatology, emergency medicine, general practice, ...7 days ago
- Address to Western Sydney University: Constitutional and Rule of Law challenges in current global en...
Tēnā koutou Nau mai haere mai ki tenei hui Thank you to Vice Chancellor Williams, and the University of Western Sydney, for inviting me to speak today. I speak to you today in my capacity as Attorney-General – the New Zealand Crown’s Senior Law Officer. In this capacity, I serve ...1 week ago
- Security advice for start-ups welcomed
Minister responsible for the security and intelligence agencies Judith Collins has welcomed new guidance that aims to protect New Zealand’s start-up and emerging technology sector from the threat of economic espionage. “We are a nation well-known for our ingenuity, and our willingness to openly collaborate in the spirit of enterprise ...1 week ago
- Funding support to strengthen frontline volunteer service organisations
The Government has approved $23.1 million for four critical frontline volunteer service organisations to replace storm-damaged assets and provide training and equipment to improve New Zealand’s response to future emergency events, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Associate Transport Minister Matt Doocey says. $14.6 million for Surf Life Saving New ...1 week ago
- Jones heads to international mining conference
Resources Minister Shane Jones will speak at Australia's largest annual mining event in Sydney this week to mark New Zealand’s return to the international industry stage. Mr Jones will attend the International Mining and Resources Conference (IMARC) where he will update the sector’s most influential players on the work the ...1 week ago
- NZ investing in Pacific disaster preparedness & climate resilience
New Zealand will contribute $20 million to the Pacific Resilience Facility, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon and Deputy Prime Minister Winston Peters have announced. “The Pacific Islands region faces severe challenges from natural disasters and climate change impacts and New Zealand is committed to doing its part to help meet them,” ...1 week ago
- Police to increase presence on Auckland public transport
Aucklanders will see a greater Police presence on public transport services to boost safety and reassure public transport workers and passengers, Police Minister Mark Mitchell and Transport and Auckland Minister Simeon Brown say. “Minister Brown and I are working together, alongside Police and Auckland Transport in response to the horrific ...1 week ago
- Government funds helicopter replacements
The Government is investing in eight new emergency helicopters to replace some of New Zealand’s ageing air ambulance fleet, Associate Health Minister Casey Costello and ACC Minister Matt Doocey announced today. “Our air ambulance helicopters play a vital role in saving lives around New Zealand,” Casey Costello says. “This is ...2 weeks ago
- China and New Zealand strengthen organic trade
An uplift to New Zealand’s organic product trade is expected through a new upgraded arrangement with China, Food Safety Minister Andrew Hoggard says.“The upgraded Mutual Recognition Arrangement (MRA) for organic products will deliver opportunities for our organic export sector.”The upgraded MRA was signed in Central Otago today by Andrew Hoggard ...2 weeks ago
- Judicial appointments announced
Attorney-General Judith Collins today announced two Court of Appeal and two High Court appointments. The four appointments will take effect on 21 November 2024 and are: Justice Christine French Justice French, who has been appointed President of the Court of Appeal, graduated with an LLB (Honours) from the University of Otago ...2 weeks ago
- Tuatapere Hump Ridge Track becomes New Zealand’s 11th Great Walk
Conservation Minister Tama Potaka joined tangata whenua from Ngāi Tahu and local community members today to celebrate the opening of New Zealand’s eleventh Great Walk – the Tuatapere Hump Ridge Track. “The 60km upgraded track provides the opportunity to do one of New Zealand’s world-class multi-day walks, and will bring ...2 weeks ago
- New Chief Criminal Cases Review Commissioner
The Honourable Denis Clifford has been appointed Chief Commissioner of the Criminal Cases Review Commission, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. Hon Clifford brings a wealth of expertise and experience that will prove invaluable to the Commission. “He has served as a judge at both the Court of Appeal and High ...2 weeks ago
- Appalling Attack On Public Service Official By Minister Crosses The Line
"Publicly attacking a public servant for giving advice that you disagree with is unacceptable within our democratic system," said Kerry Davies, National Secretary for the Public Service Association Te Pūkenga Here Tikanga Mahi. ...38 mins ago - Every travel disaster I can think of – and how travel insurance would help
While you might be reluctant to buy travel insurance, you’ll be glad to have it when things go wrong. As a natural catastrophiser, I spend a lot of time thinking about things that could go wrong – even on holiday. Perhaps I’ll be caught up in a life-threatening multi-car pileup ...58 mins ago - My Greatest Trip: Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos
A white woman’s account of backpacking through southeast Asia? Groundbreaking. In a post-social media world, I find it impossible to regale you with my trip through Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos without first doing some throat-clearing. “Doing” southeast Asia “on a shoestring” has become such a traveller’s cliche – so ...58 mins ago
- Zero-risk policy part of ‘widespread erosion’ of access to recreational areas
Twelve associations are calling for recreational activities to be formally excluded from the Health and Safety Act 2015. ...2 hours ago - The cost of being: A uni tutor who spends on vapes, samosas and the odd night out
As part of our series exploring how New Zealanders live and our relationship with money, a 21-year-old flatting in Wellington explains how she gets by. Want to be part of The Cost of Being? Fill out the questionnaire here. Gender: Wahine. Age: 21. Ethnicity: Māori. Role: Tutor at Victoria University. Salary/income/assets: ...2 hours ago
- Yes, burning gas is bad for the climate. But keeping it in Australia’s energy mix is sensible
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Roger Dargaville, Director Monash Energy Institute, Monash University Shutterstock Both major parties in Australia see a significant role for gas as the world shifts to clean energy in a bid to avert dangerous climate change. The Albanese government says new sources ...3 hours ago - Live: Luxon ‘frustrated’ with officials but ‘confident’ in Cabinet conflict ...
The Prime Minister Christopher Luxon says he's confident about Cabinet's own conflict of interest processes ...3 hours ago
- Bird flu has been detected in a pig in the US. Why does that matter?
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By C Raina MacIntyre, Professor of Global Biosecurity, NHMRC L3 Research Fellow, Head, Biosecurity Program, Kirby Institute, UNSW Sydney David MG/Shutterstock The United States Department of Agriculture last week reported that a pig on a backyard farm in Oregon was infected with ...3 hours ago
- What happens if you have a HELP debt and kids? The missed opportunity in Labor’s plan to fix stude...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Mark Warburton, Honorary Senior Fellow, Centre for the Study of Higher Education, The University of Melbourne Rogut/Pexels , CC BY The Albanese government has announced several significant changes to student loans to start in mid-2025. These include wiping 20% off debts, ...3 hours ago
- Memes, photojournalism and television debates: 3 images that defined the 2024 US election
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Kylie Message, Professor of Public Humanities and Director of the ANU Humanities Research Centre, Australian National University Visual images often last in historical and popular memory. This is especially the case in presidential campaigns in the United States, which offer a vast ...3 hours ago
- Todd McClay, trade, and the spectre of Trump
The PM says he’ll work with whoever wins the White House, but the trade minister has previously expressed concern over higher tariffs, writes Stewart Sowman-Lund for The Bulletin. To receive The Bulletin in full each weekday, sign up here. ...4 hours ago
- America heads to the polls, and into a great unknown
Opinion: Wednesday November 6, NZ time, sees the majority of voting in the 2024 US presidential election. While it is unlikely we will have a confirmed result until later (Thursday is best case, but the result could take weeks, depending on how close it is), the next week promises to ...4 hours ago - Live: Minister accuses health officials of undermining smoking reforms
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon will talk to Morning Report live. ...4 hours ago
- The longest commute, day two: Joel says a sad goodbye to Invercargill
Joel MacManus attempts to travel from the bottom to the top of the country without a car or plane. Today: Invercargill to Dunedin and beyond. The mission: Get from Stewart Island to Cape Reinga as fast as possible using only public transport. Wherever I can, I’ll travel by train. In ...5 hours ago
- Scientists concerned about delays to critical report
Scientists are becoming increasingly worried about delays to a critical report that could see an overhaul of the country's science infrastructure and funding. ...5 hours ago
- Blood cancer patients call on National to honour commitment
Patients want National to take note of a report on blood cancer medicines and remember its pre-election promise that they would not be forgotten. ...6 hours ago
- When will we know the US presidential election results in New Zealand?
And everything else you need to know about timings, where and what to watch in our user’s guide to the Trump v Harris big day(s). One ancient candidate ejected after a catastrophic debate performance, another shot in the head in a horrific, failed assassination attempt. Racism, misogyny, plausible claims of ...6 hours ago
- Is it possible to travel without damaging the climate? Yes
Trains, bikes and sailboats already exist, and choosing to travel more slowly can be a pleasure, too. “I’ve seen more on my bike that I would have seen in my whole lifetime, if I’d been flying,” says Robbie Webb. He’s calling me from Ghent, where he’s staying with friends, nearly ...6 hours ago
- Oil supply crisis could trigger a sovereignty crisis for NZ
If Middle East oil flows were seriously disrupted, it would hit NZ harder than most other OECD countries The post Oil supply crisis could trigger a sovereignty crisis for NZ appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- ‘Hold us to account’: Iwi defends its own fast-track project
Ngāti Manuhiri hopes to fast-track over 400 homes and an on-shore aquaculture facility, but is committed to meeting the ‘gold standard’ no matter what the fast-track allows The post ‘Hold us to account’: Iwi defends its own fast-track project appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Tax competitiveness just isn’t cricket (Estonia win again)
Opinion: Importance of combining a flat GST with a progressive income tax The post Tax competitiveness just isn’t cricket (Estonia win again) appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Self-cert buildings could work with a random element
Analysis: A more comprehensive solution would involve spot checks by third-party inspectors The post Self-cert buildings could work with a random element appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Mansfield painted as ‘bold, reckless’ colonial
Nelson artist Sally Burton, has always been intrigued by Katherine Mansfield and describes her as bold, brave ‘and sort of lonely.’ Her fascination with Mansfield began at Nelson Girls’ College, when she was a teenager. She read every Mansfield manuscript she could lay her hands on. She loves her ‘wicked observations of ...6 hours ago
- Unions seek international inquiry into charter schools policy
A formal complaint to the global workers’ rights watchdog follows official advice to ministers that the policy likely breaches international labour law The post Unions seek international inquiry into charter schools policy appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Taxing people unfairly just isn’t cricket
Opinion: Importance of combining a flat GST with a progressive income tax The post Taxing people unfairly just isn’t cricket appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Concerns over new, streamlined building consent process
The building consent regime is about to be streamlined by the government, with self-certifications replacing some council inspections.It means councils will be partly removed from the building consent process, allowing qualified tradespeople – including plumbers and builders – to forego inspections for low-risk builds.Self-certifications will be open to those with ...6 hours ago
- Auckland’s risk of becoming becalmed
Opinion: New Zealand had the fastest boat on the water at the recent America’s Cup. But the country’s largest city Auckland does not have such comparable speed in the international cities’ race.The World Economic Forum says cities are critical for developing competitive, innovation-driven economies, particularly those with strong infrastructure, vibrant ...6 hours ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Tuesday 5 November
Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A,DIV,A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Tuesday 5 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Daily crossword, Tuesday 5 November
The post Daily crossword, Tuesday 5 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...6 hours ago
- Paul Goldsmith buys a book in Queenstown
Two days at a literary festival in Queenstown followed by two days at a literary festival in Akaroa – literature in two kinds of South Island paradise, one surrounded by snow and wealth, built on schist and the memory of gold, the other a pretty little harbour village with two ...6 hours ago
- Corporates regain appetite for growth following OCR cuts
A change in direction from the central bank has corporates coming out of hibernation and gaining confidence to shift gears into expansion mode.With inflation inside its target band, earlier this month the Reserve Bank cut the official cash rate by 50 basis points to 4.75 percent.This larger than usual interest ...6 hours ago
- US election: Women will pick the winner
“They’re both wrong,” the 80-year-old Arizonan says.But Kamala Harris will probably win because she’s been strong on a woman’s right to access abortions, she says.The mother, who doesn’t want to be identified “because I’ll probably be too honest”, believes Harris is bad for the economy, for job creation, for businesses, ...6 hours ago
- Crossbenchers cancel their membership of airlines’ elite lounges
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra Crossbench independents Allegra Spender, Helen Haines and Kate Chaney have declared they are pulling out of the elite lounges run by Qantas and Virgin, amid the ongoing spotlight on privileges politicians receive from the airlines. ...16 hours ago
- Jonathan Cook: Israel kills the journalists. Western media kills the truth of genocide in Gaza
Report by Dr David Robie – Café Pacific. – Western publics are being subjected to a campaign of psychological warfare, where genocide is classed as ‘self-defence’ and opposition to it ‘terrorism’. Jonathan Cook reports as the world marked the International Day to End Impunity for Crimes against Journalists at ...16 hours ago
- New Zealand Loyal Political Party Is Under New Management
The AGM will allow its members, for the very first time, to democratically elect a Board to take the New Zealand Loyal Political Party through to the 2026 General Election. ...16 hours ago
- 31% of companies are not paying tax in Australia. How do they do it?
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Kerrie Sadiq, Professor of Taxation, QUT Business School, and ARC Future Fellow, Queensland University of Technology Seb Zurcher/Unsplash Large companies paid the Australian government a record A$100 billion in tax in the last year, a 17% increase on the previous year. ...17 hours ago
- Authentically embracing tikanga Māori can help New Zealand in the growing Asian markets
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Hafsa Ahmed, Senior lecturer, Department of Global Value Chains and Trade, Lincoln University, New Zealand The Asian markets have long been seen as a linchpin for New Zealand’s economic success. And the key to future growth could be the cultural similarities between ...18 hours ago
- Apart from Chris Martin’s fall, here are 10 other examples of onstage accidents. Can we keep perfo...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Milad Haghani, Senior Lecturer of Urban Analytics & Resilience, UNSW Sydney In recent months, Australian concertgoers have witnessed plenty of unexpected onstage drama. The latest example came from Coldplay’s sold-out Sunday show in Melbourne. Lead singer Chris Martin took a sudden ...18 hours ago
- Australia is axing a $7bn military satellite project, leaving defence comms potentially vulnerable
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By David Tuffley, Senior Lecturer in Applied Ethics & CyberSecurity, Griffith University In a significant blow to Australia’s defence capabilities, the federal government is cancelling what would have been the nation’s largest-ever space project: a A$7 billion military satellite communications system. The ...18 hours ago
- Dams have taken half the water from Australia’s second biggest river – and climate change will m...
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Jan Kreibich, PhD Candidate, Centre for Ecosystem Science & Water Research Laboratory, UNSW Sydney Annette Ruzicka The largest wetland on Australia’s second longest river, the Murrumbidgee in the southern Murray-Darling Basin, is drying up. This is bad news for the plants, ...18 hours ago
The server will be getting hardware changes this evening starting at 10pm NZDT.
The site will be off line for some hours.
The Power and The Passion
Oh, sweety, you are poor? Here, love, have a candy cane for Christmas! See, I care!
Just don’t come into a WINZ office in the New Year for a dental grant!
Ahaa you lot. The ladder’s gone. I got it all. You got nuttin.
“Getting booted out of your state house so we can sell it to property speculators? Here’s a candy cane”
“One for every child I pushed into poverty today”
Ha! There’s been a mistake; when I said I’d be caning the beneficiaries I meant something else altogether.
I’ve always got away with everything. Some get a caning but I’m sweet – this is the only cane I ever get.
Have you been good? Santa will give you a present. You bad lazy sods who can’t find work will get nothing.
See! I can handle the big financial jobs in government
I’m all decked out in the colours of the political parties who are actually going to do something about poverty.
“colours of the political parties”
She’s wearing the red, blue and black of the intended future uber betrayal govt (Labour neolibs, Nat, NZF), and the canes are the left of Labour and the GP about to get sucked into oblivion.
I cannot see any blue in her clothing.
Is that ideological blindness? 😉
(her top under the red over thingy is blue)
I read your comment.
I have got around to checking out why my computer made the top look black, using another computer I can see the deep blue.
enjoy them now because next year there wont be any lollies at all
Hello campers, hi de hi – hi de ho
Lols. So very apt. Madame Beenete missed her true calling.
I took them from a baby!
Let them eat candy!
Let them eat cake! What, at that price? Hahahaha cheap candy it is!
Look, I am just practicing what our own Pinocchio has taught us : How to sweetly smile and wave while still dishing out utter crap!
My friend Katharine Rich says this is a great way to get kids to eat greens !
“Sweetie — It’s 100% sugar with toxic artificial colouring and additives and it’s really twisted and it has a hook in it ! What more could you possibly want ?”
(Thus spake the ghost of Christmas past-its-due-by-date.)
sorry these are all …mine!
I’m a complete arsehole, but I’m a happy clappy one!! 🙂
Hey kids! Christmas candy canes for sale!
“They gave me this full bowl of candy canes to hand out to the poor children but I’ve been here for a whole 10 minutes and no poor children have appeared. Oh well, guess I’ll have another !”
Hehehe; Let them eat candy canes…..
“This is the ONLY thing that the rich Chinese donors gave us. Honest!”
More government u-turns coming to you real soon.
You should have gone to Specsavers, Paula. You were told to get meat hooks. One for you, and one for each of your colleagues.
Winz announce incentive scheme to get the unemployed to move to the north pole.
Merry Fucking Christmas New Zealand
this. exactly this.
Nice!
It was so simple stealing this candy from those beneficiaries babies.
i am the mean christmas fairy
here to stop the kids being merry
no presents or turkey for bennies
WINZ will cut off your pennies!
it’s a bit of a laugh to me
and a chance to get on TV
LOL! @bennies cut off pennies. Ouch!
Trick or treat my treats are not very nourishing just covered in 100 % sugar.
Our next PM, promoting a corporate xmas. Because, if you mentioned that Christ wanted a society dedicated to a liberation theology – it might just all go pear shaped for the Tory scum.
“Its true you give out a few of these and they think you give a fuck”
“You better watch out
You better not lie
Like those loony lefties.
I’m telling you why
The SIS are coming to town
We’ll see you when you’re sleeping
We’ll know when you’re awake
We’ll hear every word you say
With this microphone candy cane”
“We sell off their state houses but fool them with some coloured candy to cope!”
I’ve got the goodies, now that Judith is out of the way.
Paula (to journalists): “Actually there’s a hilarious anecdote attached to this. As I was stealing this candy from the Children’s Hospital Ward just a few minutes ago, some little kid got visibly upset and all teary eyed. Well, you know me, I believe in Tough Love – so I was forced to tell her: “Zip it, Sweetie, these are all mine !!! Aunty Paula’s got a sweet tooth, Okay ?????”. Ha, ha, ha, I laugh about it now, but I mean the absolute, bare-faced arrogance of these little brats !!!”
The Grinch revealed after having full bodywax
Oh dear – so appropiate
OMG, why didn’t see it before ? Paula’s not the Grinch. That stare, those eyebrows…. Its Judith !!
Thats not ‘Paula the beneficiciary!’
Yes! It’s Paula ‘the Beneficiary’
“I am just about to go and feed our homeless!”
Everything I touch does this
bennett:..’why don’t benificiaries gt off their fat lazy arses..
..and make something like this..’?..’
bennett:..
‘..these are the staples that were used in my stomach-stapling op..’
bennett:..
‘..so..i said to them..’we don’t have poverty..because we don’t even measure poverty..!..
..it’s as easy as that..!’
..then we all had a good laugh..!’
bennett dreams of being leader..and does a pretend cabinet-shuffle..
This is all you poor people get this year from Bitchyfit
‘Suck on this, you poor suckers!”
Ha, ha! These are bitter! Tricked you, ha, ha!!
Auditions for Chitty Chitty Bang Bang The Sequel, produced a clear winner for the part of The Child Snatcher.
Christmas Tree at back “Christ, Father Christmas has really let himself go!”
Does this red suit make my left hand look really really over sized?
On Three Ms Bennet “Say Liposuctionnnnnn”
Bennett doles out surprising low dividends of the power companies sell off to the public.
Bennett says “Has anyone seen my balls?” Christmas tree responds ” We are behind youuuuuuuuuuuu!”
Bennett.”We are going to move those over sixties who live alone in two and three bedroom Housing N.Z.Homes,into one bedroom community housing clusters more suitable to their needs so we can give families accommodation suitable to them.
‘ITS SO EASY,ITS LIKE TAKING CANDY FROM A BABY”.
Let them eat candy
Advice to the poor:
Have some candy to feel more dandy!
You want to feel randy? Yep, have some candy!
We thought these new walking sticks for the disabled are a great idea. Like our health system they are cheap, impractical and won’t work but hey at least you get a short lived sugar fix. And maybe diabetes……
Eat your heart out Judith. JK is giving me all the photo opps now!
Don’t tell anyone, the last budget was heavily sugar coated, just like the candy canes.
Move Over Candy Crush’er there’s a new girl in town, introducing for her own pleasure “Candy Cane”
They have introduced zero contract hours for politicians, so I thought I would moonlight flogging off tooth rotting crap.
” I got these cariogenic Candy
From distant callipygous Burundi
‘Cause we have happily made Redundi
All of our very own good R & D !“
If you are living in pain
or your life savings were flushed down the drain
Let me offer you a candy cane
and a cardboard box to keep off the rain
The Gnats will let problems remain
unresolved, and rig the game
So the rich can take all the gains
while we laugh and drink champagne
Ho Ho Ho
Like stealing candy from a baby
Our next trick is to steal the baby from the Beneficiary.
Monitor them secretly for 24 hours (we wanted 48 hours but those commies in Labour reduced it to 24 hours). If they are deemed unworthy of our taxpayers dollars then we can confiscate the baby or the benefit or both!
It worked so well for those Abo’s in OZ and those dissident babes in Argentina.
That also solves the adoption program too!
Hey John, these hooks are just the thing to pull up ladders!
Your my winner 🙂
” God has blessed you all poor sods
For you’ve survived amazing odds!
Rejoice in our gold star e-con-o-my
For you aren’t yet dead with me-lon-co-ly!
Give shouts of praise for Nats at Christmas time
For I’m dishing you out some candy time.
The chain stores and con-glom-er-ates
May have brought you to your knees;
Low wages, rent and living costs
May have caught you all in a squeeze;
But we still claim rich dudes are real poor
And you sorry lot are mightily rich!”
Let them eat candy.
Hunger Games
Need1 Greed 21
“Who ate all the candy?” Paula moves on from the pies.
My Halloween takings were well up. No costume this year, but scared the bejesus out of everyone by telling them I will be the next PM.