Caption contest
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3:08 pm, December 19th, 2014 - 67 comments
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National has a hard-on for "boot camps" as part of its desperate attempt to grub "tough on crime" votes from sadistic geriatric pedophobes. That's bad enough, but its gets worse: the camps will be privatised. And they will be allowed to use force against children: A leaked ministerial document ...2 hours ago - Rwanda’s Kagame: from Saviour to Tyrant?
Is Rwanda turning into a country that seeks regional dominance and exterminates its rivals? This is a contention examined by Dr Michela Wrong, and Dr Maria Armoudian. Dr Wrong is a journalist who has written best-selling books on Africa. Her latest, Do Not Disturb. The story of a political murder ...2 hours ago - Stephen Rainbow is ACT’s crony
Back in August, National sabotaged human rights by appointing terf and genocide supporter Stephen Rainbow as Chief Human Rights Commissioner. The Spinoff has been digging into this, and they've uncovered new information: Rainbow didn't actually get the job - until suddenly he did: “I didn’t get the HRC role ...2 hours ago
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Kia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Tuesday, November 5: Strangely for a party that prides itself on being a mainstream bastion of ‘small c’ conservatism, National under PM Christopher Luxon is increasingly at risk ...4 hours ago - Time Cut
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Go out and find a girlCome on, come on, and dance all nightDespite the heat it'll be alrightAnd babe, don't you know it's a pityThat the days can't be like the nightsIn the summer, in the citySong: John Sebastian, Mark Sebastian, Steve BooneThank YouTo begin today, a thank you. Yesterday, ...6 hours ago - The Bewildering World of Chris Luxon – Playing Politics in Glass Houses
..Thanks for reading Frankly Speaking ! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.By now we’re all aware of Mike King’s comments regarding use of alcohol to self-medicate mental health problems. On NewstalkZB, King stated:“Alcohol is not a problem for people with mental health issues. It’s actually the ...7 hours ago - Seymour’s Shaky Response To Earthquake Claims
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- Don’t Move
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Hi,It’s a big election in three days. Like me, you’re probably sick of hearing about it, but like it or not — what America does tends to trickle down everywhere else. America farts and we’re all under the sheet being hotboxed against our will.I’ll do a fresh Webworm on election ...2 days ago - All I Ever Am
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Now, in the land of leaky buildings and the Warehouse-where-everyone-gets-a-bargain, there came an electionAnd this was the one known as the show-bloody-Labour-the-bloody-door electionAnd there came into this election the one known as ChrisAnd of fresh thought or original idea, Chris was full emptyBut this was all good broFor Chris was ...2 days ago - Fact brief – Are most glaciers growing?
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Last week, the government had a big wank about police raids in Ōpōtiki, crowing about "gangs" and "drugs" and "law and order". Unfortunately the police did exactly the same shit they did in the Urewera terror raids 17 years ago, dragging people off in front of their kids and terrorising ...5 days ago
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...
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- We’ve got issues
1 week ago - ‘Happy to watch your grandkids grow up in Australia via WhatsApp?’
Globally, NZ has the second-highest share of its population living overseas permanently, many of them now permanently in Australia. Photo: Lynn Grieveson / The KākāKia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Tuesday, October 29: A ...1 week ago
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Te Pāti Māori Co-Leader and MP for Te Tai Hauāuru, Debbie Ngarewa-Packer is calling on the Mayor for New Plymouth, Neil Holdom, to do the right thing. “I am shocked at his decision to disregard the petition presented by Palestine Solidarity Taranaki calling for an immediate and permanent ceasefire”, said ...1 day ago
- Release: Trade deal with Gulf states welcomed
Labour welcomes the conclusion of a trade deal with the Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) that was restarted under a Labour government after languishing for many years. ...1 day ago
- Release: Labour welcomes OAG fast track inquiry
The Government should consider the outcome of an Auditor-General report into conflicts of interest before progressing the Fast track Approvals Bill through Parliament. ...1 day ago
- Greens reignite call for free dental
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- Mark Patterson: Farmers understand we have their backs
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The National Government should review its support for Gumboot Friday after unacceptable comments by its leader and champion Mike King. ...5 days ago
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The Green Party was appalled to hear Prime Minister Christopher Luxon claim we are “doing everything we can” on climate change, while his government does nothing to address emissions in our most polluting sector. ...1 week ago
- Govt Must Clean Up ‘Its Shit’ From Sunken HMNZS Manawanui
Te Pāti Māori is calling out the Government and New Zealand Defence Force (NZDF) for their inaction and disgraceful downplaying of the impact caused by the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa. “We demand the Government move without further delay to clean up its shit from the sunken HMNZS Manawanui in Samoa,” said co-leader Debbie ...1 week ago
- Jamie Arbuckle: Inquiry into Banking Competition
This week was the start of the bank inquiry hearings into banking competition. The inquiry was confirmed in the NZ First/National Coalition agreement. 140 submissions were received on the inquiry, and we will hear from over 60 submitters including all the major banks. ANZ, New Zealand's largest bank, was first ...1 week ago
- Tanya Unkovich: It’s time to start the debate on palliative care as a ‘right’
There is one topic that is the great human leveller, and that is of death and dying. One day, we will all have to face it, and I am of the belief that being able to pass away with grace and dignity is a vital, basic, human right. How we ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour backs Christchurch City Council sanctions on Israel
Labour is backing Christchurch City Council’s decision not to do business with firms involved in Israel’s illegal settlements in the Occupied Territories. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Government driving away offshore wind industry
The Government has created a hostile environment for companies seeking to build offshore wind farms. ...2 weeks ago
- Another step towards Pasifika justice
The Green Party acknowledges the historical importance of MP Teanau Tuiono’s Member’s Bill, Restoring Citizenship Removed By Citizenship (Western Samoa) Act 1982 Bill, passing its second reading in Parliament today. ...2 weeks ago
- Sanctions Soar, Jobs Vanish – National’s Cruelty Exposed
Te Pāti Māori is enraged at the National government’s ruthless punishment of beneficiaries, all while jobs are disappearing. MSD data shows a 133% increase in sanctions over the past year, with over 14,000 sanctions in just three months. The kicker? The jobs this government insists people should find are nowhere ...2 weeks ago
- Police Perpetuate Siege on Ōpōtiki
Te Pāti Māori MP for Waiariki, Rawiri Waititi, says today’s police-sponsored terrorism in Ōpōtiki is a continuation of the State’s predatory behaviour towards the iwi of Te Whakatōhea. "Ōpōtiki is once again being intentionally targeted and is the direct byproduct of this Government’s 'tough on crime' legislative changes,” said MP ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Govt cuts school lunches even further
The Government has gone back on its word and cut the full school lunch programme in primary schools after saying it wouldn’t. ...2 weeks ago
- Time to shut down failed Youth Justice Residences
The Green Party is calling for Youth Justice Residences to close, following a protest in which a group of young people spent the night on the roof of an Oranga Tamariki justice facility. ...2 weeks ago
- Tell Luxon to Kill the Treaty Principles Bill
Te Tiriti o Waitangi is our country’s founding document. It forms the basis of the relationship between Māori and the Crown – and the Aotearoa New Zealand we live in today. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Appalling process on three strikes law
The Government is subverting parliamentary process on laws the evidence already shows don’t work. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour calls for investigation into tobacco tax cut
The Government’s decision to award a $216 million tax break for Philip Morris’ heated tobacco products reeks of tobacco industry interference and needs to be thoroughly investigated. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Delay to retirement village review won’t help residents
The National Government is treading water on a much-needed review of the Retirement Villages Act, kicking any amendments down the road till the next parliamentary term in 2027. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Serious concerns ignored in Govt’s fast track bill
National’s fast track bill enables the most radical and unbalanced consenting regime in living memory. ...3 weeks ago
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Despite resounding public opposition, the fast-track legislation is being pushed through Parliament with provisions that could have real consequences for people and planet. ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Labour supports continuing fight for dairy access
Labour welcomes the National Government’s decision to further pursue our access to the Canadian dairy market under the Comprehensive and Progressive Agreement for Trans-Pacific Partnership (CPTPP) ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Job losses devastating for Timaru
Confirmed news that the Smithfield meatworks will close is devastating for the hundreds of people who work there, Timaru and the wider region. ...3 weeks ago
- New Zealand First Member’s Bill to Improve Access to Palliative Care
New Zealand First has introduced a Member’s Bill which aims to improve access to palliative care for all New Zealanders, ensuring kiwis have better access to the compassionate palliative support they may need. The ‘Improving Access to Palliative Care Bill’ seeks to guarantee that every New Zealander has the right ...3 weeks ago
- Release: Further uncertainty for Kiwirail as jobs set to go
KiwiRail offering voluntary redundancy to all its staff is hugely concerning given the future of New Zealand’s rail system is under threat. ...3 weeks ago
- ASA Declares Hobson’s Pledge Advertising Misleading and Socially Irresponsible
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National’s all pain approach to beneficiaries has yielded no gain as benefit numbers continue to surge past projected figures. ...3 weeks ago
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Entering politics is a privilege afforded to very few and, as the saying goes, with great power comes great responsibility. Being an MP is a call to service. Whatever your politics you have a duty to show up. Whatever your party's policy, you have made a promise to those who ...3 weeks ago
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Today’s report from the International Energy Agency highlights how far this Government’s actions are dragging us backwards in the fight against climate change. ...3 weeks ago
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News that 173 roles are being cut at Police will only put more pressure on the frontline. ...3 weeks ago
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- Speech – Diwali 2024
Namaste. Namaskar. Namaskaram. Vanakkam. Sat Sri Akal. Kem chho. Greetings to you all. It is my great privilege, as Minister for Ethnic Communities, to host this year’s Diwali Celebration at Parliament. I am truly excited to be with you all for Diwali as your Minister, and I warmly welcome each ...23 hours ago
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- Government’s creative sector strategy released
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- Todd McClay to lead large trade mission to China
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- Pou Whenua blessing honours Tongariro
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- New members appointed to the NZTA Board
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- Welcome relief from new oestradiol gel funding
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- Deputy Prime Minister visit to Australia
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Tēnā koutou Nau mai haere mai ki tenei hui Thank you to Vice Chancellor Williams, and the University of Western Sydney, for inviting me to speak today. I speak to you today in my capacity as Attorney-General – the New Zealand Crown’s Senior Law Officer. In this capacity, I serve ...1 week ago
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The Government has approved $23.1 million for four critical frontline volunteer service organisations to replace storm-damaged assets and provide training and equipment to improve New Zealand’s response to future emergency events, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Associate Transport Minister Matt Doocey says. $14.6 million for Surf Life Saving New ...1 week ago
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- Police to increase presence on Auckland public transport
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- Government funds helicopter replacements
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- China and New Zealand strengthen organic trade
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Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Stephen Duckett, Honorary Enterprise Professor, School of Population and Global Health, and Department of General Practice and Primary Care, The University of Melbourne Drazen Zigic/Shutterstock Australians today are more likely than previous generations to live with complex and chronic diseases, such ...1 hour ago - IRD Data Leaking Killed By 9,000-strong Taxpayers’ Union Campaign
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Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A,DIV,A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Tuesday 5 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...12 hours ago
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The server will be getting hardware changes this evening starting at 10pm NZDT.
The site will be off line for some hours.
In fact, I’m not sorry for anything. I never apologise, except to Cameron Slater.
and then only when he’s got me by the short and curlies, or when I deem him still useful.
But I am sorry for upsetting Cameron …
One of these people really has issues with apologies
“I’m not sorry for being a tricky man, but I oughta be!”
(Who is she?)
Petulant child refuses to apologise for being a man.
Our elder statesman in all his eminence and virtue.
John Key and his rock star economy circa 2021
Once upon a time you dressed so fine
Threw the bums a dime in your prime, didn’t you?
People call say ‘beware doll, you’re bound to fall’
You thought they were all kidding you
You used to laugh about
Everybody that was hanging out
Now you don’t talk so loud
Now you don’t seem so proud
About having to be scrounging your next meal
How does it feel, how does it feel?
To be without a home
Like a complete unknown, like a rolling stone
And the flip side is (via twitter) …..
heh. The original is photoshopped too though isn’t it?
Two inflatable egoes frame one inflatable “politician”.
Just a sorry excuse of a man….
Crap djs suck up to a crap pm wearing a crap tee shirt holding a crap cd.
I’m just sorry our PM is not Idris Elba, then there’s a chance that t-shirt might look cool, but on John-boy it just looks kinda sad.
The Edge.
Training kids to be Tories since 1994.
Excellent Paul, although you could throw all the other stations in there as well.
Buy one Good times CD get a free teeshirt, this product set comes complete with gormless manipulative corporate lacky. (privatised power sources not included)
@ PhiDC lol
The Edge, where lack of musical taste meets lack of decency.
“For not being sorry for being a man I get to be hooker1”
That short tshirt guy in the middle, that’s such a cliche about being a man and true to type, he’s found a shorter woman friend. It’s well known, short men always have to boast and boost themselves next to someone taller with muscles.
Grow up and be a man.
Radio Sport.
As obsequious and owned as the Edge.
A snivelling interview with Key.
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/sport/news/video.cfm?c_id=1503077&gal_cid=1503077&gallery_id=147363
Left to right the reference is to music john must be the odd one out.
“I’m not sorry Tania Billingsly was denied justice, even though I promised I’d apologise to her. At the end of the day she was probably asking for it”.
“I’m not sorry for being a man, because being a man means facing up to my responsibilities.”
“I am not sorry, but very proud indeed, that I have managed to fool the trusting people of this country hook, line and sinker!”
As he took his usual place in the centre of things, he had an unusual flash of self-awareness and realised he looked more like a fool than a man but forced a smile anyway.
miravox- not exactly a caption but the best Gary Larson type summation I’ve seen so far.
Dear god what a foolish looking man..actually all three look cringeful and embarrassed at their stupidness..
Mike Brandt (pictured left) and Kelly Pulson (pictured right), took this photo opportunity with Dohn Key (pictured centre) at the album release party of ‘I Love this Orange Flower’ by the duo – Kim Dot-Com and Dohn Key.
The album contains the number one hit of 2014 “I’m NOT Sorry for being a Man” exclusively written and recorded by Kim Dot-Com and Dohn Key.
There was controversy about copyright infringement with apparently parts of the song being extracted from an Eminem song. Dohn Key was questioned with regard to the allegation with which Dohn Key replied “To be honest, I don’t remember”.
Eminem was satisfied with Dohn Keys response and has dropped the charge against Dohn Key.
Dohn Key has informed us he will be releasing another album in early 2015 titled “Got ya by the Balls” with a follow up one titled “Gi Me Ya Land & Resources”, then another titled “Give it to the Empire”
Some of his past number one singles were “I’ll make ya rich”, “Trust Me”, “Turn Around”, “I’m the Saviour”, “Got ya Back” and “Slavery is Freedom”.
@ subharmonicFrequency
[Dohn Key plans] another album in early 2015 titled “Got ya by the Balls” with a follow up one titled “Gi Me Ya Land & Resources”, then another titled “Give it to the Empire”
Dohn Key has been very affected by the theme of the Star Wars Empire and sees himself in the nature of a leader palpitating sufficiently to reprise Palpatine’s Empire.
The Galactic Empire, also known as the New Order, the Old Empire, the First Galactic Empire, Palpatine’s New Order, the Imperium or simply the Empire,
“We are an Empire ruled by the majority! An Empire ruled by a new Constitution! An Empire of laws, not of politicians! An Empire devoted to the preservation of a just society. Of a safe and secure society! We are an Empire that will stand for ten thousand years!”
―Palpatine[src]
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Galactic_Empire
Dohn Key is careful to present and dress himself as a man of the people, but he surrounds himself with followers dress in black, which is an unacknowledged affiliating uniform for his mercenaries who are under direct control of the black-clad figure of Girth Vader (called Great Father by the footsoldiers.)
Those watching Dohn Key and fearing his ambitions have a uniting slogan –
Help me, Obi-Wan. You’re my only hope! They are also working with scientists on creating a holographic image called Leia holo which can be used for instant personal communication and encouragement for the anti Dohn Key faction who object to him and his plans for an evil Empire.
http://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/mar/20/princess-leia-hologram-3d-display
NewstalkZB welcomes it’s newest talkback host and spin-doctor.. the PM! “Helping to keep Corporate control of New Zealand since who knows when..”
Flabby gut and saggy man-tits distort text on cheap-looking, poorly-printed, tasteless skivvy.
Sorry excuse for a man
I made a comment on Facebook about this post, which lprent would possibly delete from here. It was something about whether Key let the DJs use a part of their anatomies containing teeth to do something to a part of his anatomy which has no teeth at all. Best not to repeat it here, but the way they lick a certain part of him made me sick.
God I love our corporatocracy.
I cannot think of anything even slightly funny to say about this.
My partner says it’s a shame we have such a dickwad for a Prime Minister.
(Surely to god this is photoshopped – someone tell me.)
I’m sorry he’s our prime minister
First prize 🙂
said between gritted teeth:
“how long do I hack to hold this ducking snile lynton”
“I am not sorry for being a man”
http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/celebrities/64350700/john-key-schmoozes-with-katy-perry
Sexist ageing old git politician makes a dick of himself with a 20 something pop star
Time had finally caught up with Keith Richards as was shown as he posed with fans for a photo
Fella on right, shows off John Keys selection for the new flag…..
John Keys, in promo event, aka donations to his pension fund, the launch of his CD…..called tales from the tea shop…..tracks include fully redacted tea shop talk, solos from Pete George and kareoke out takes from Paula Bennett and winzs slaves
Keys Geldorf launches Nat Aid CD, all donations to Banksters in Distress…..Feed The Rich.
On my count,,,,,,,crouchhhhhh,,,, touchhhhhhh,,,,,,,,,,raiseeeeeeeeeeeee taxes!
Ecosse Maidy
Another good selection.
Is that a T-shirt? Or a mini-skirt?
Not quite long enough to cover a multitude of venal sins…
Most of our species exhibits are easily identifiable but we thought perhaps we needed to label this one
See, I pose with some common underclass too!
key:..
‘..i found him in a bath-house in washington..cute..!..isn’t he..?’
(but seriously..who on earth are those two people with key..?
..i wouldn’t have a clue who they are..
..is one a rolling stones roadie..?..or just some wanker who bought a t-shirt..?..)
Dom and JJ from the edge radio station
which is which..?
..and why do they have names like that.?
..is it really frank and mary..?
..is it called ‘the edge’ because it is ‘edgy’..?
..or because it is way out on ‘the edge’ of good taste..?
(i mean..look who they hang out with..!…guilt by association..and all that..)
..which is it..?..if not/neither..what does it mean..?
..so many questions for our resident ‘edge/j.j./dom’-expert..
The Edge is a dreadful radio station that, behind the crap music it plays, trains young teens to be self-centred neoliberal consumers.
The DJs are both around 40 and try to behave cool by acting like they are 14.
They invite Key on every Xmas and fawn all over him.
It’s best not to listen to the station.
thanks 4 the warning..i suspected as much..
..my radio-listening arc has been bfm to national radio..
..i can’t listen to that commercial-crap..
..all those screaming/crap/witless ads…
..all that d.j-babble..that mindless d.j/radio-personality ‘babble’..
..and as you mentioned ‘crap music’..
..and how well insulated am i..!..i have never/ever heard a song from ‘frozen’..
..wouldn’t know one if i fell over it..
..aren’t i lucky..?..
BFM a much better idea
Inhuman Monster Revealed!
In a stunning move, Prime Minister John Key opted to use the novel medium of a tee-shirt to finally reveal his true non-human nature. Having successfully posed as a bona fide male Homo sapiens for his entire time on Earth, Key used the finely wrought words crafted by Crosby Textor to announce his true alien nature. The spin doctored message was actually the gentlest way to tell hardworking Kiwis the truth he said. “I’m totally comfortable with being New Zealand’s first alien PM”, he added.
Seems to have been a typo on the shirt . . . Isn’t it supposed to read “I’m sorry for NOT being a man”?
“Hey you three, cut the crap”.
“only real men apologise”
“I’m not sorry for being inhuman”
There, fixed it.
“Im not sorry for being a man, because despite appearances I’m still a boy”
The Keymaster is here to unlock the potential of NZ: by pillaging virgin territory in the national interest. Screw the gatekeepers, and never apologise.
Is that idiot in the middle a PM Jez get him out of here
Or I will fire him
Is that idiot in the middle a PM Jez get him out of here
Or I will fire him
There is no depression in New Zealand;
there are no sheep on our farms,
There is no depression in New Zealand;
we can all keep perfectly calm,
Everybody’s talking about World War Three;
everybody’s talking about World War Three,
But we’re as safe as safe can be,
there’s no unrest in this country
We have no dole queues,
we have no drug addicts,
we have no racism,
we have no sexism, sexism, no, no
There is no depression in New Zealand;
there are no teeth in our heads
There is no depression in New Zealand;
we sleep in a well made bed
Oh but everybody’s talking about World War Three,
yes everybody’s talking about World War Three,
But we’re as safe as safe can be,
there’s no unrest in this country
We have no SIS,
we have no secrets,
we have no rebellion;
we have no valium, valium, no, no
There is no depression in New Zealand;
there are no sheep on our farms,
There is no depression in New Zealand;
oh we can all keep perfectly calm,
perfectly calm,
perfectly calm,
perfectly calm,
perfectly calm…
We have maintained a silence closely resembling stupidity.