National’s social media is starting to suck

46 comments on “National’s social media is starting to suck ”

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1. Carolyn_nth 1

   31 May 2017 at 8:31 am

   And in that Nat cricket pic: the boys are with dad, presumably waiting to follow in his footsteps. meanwhile the girl is standing on the margins, looking a little left out.

   It’s a white man’s colonialist world. Cricket, the game of old imperial England.

   Though, I did play backyard cricket with my bros as a child. Dad was probably off playing bowls.
   • greywarshark 1.1

     31 May 2017 at 10:07 am

     And Dad is available in the weekend, to play with the kids, and hopefully humble himself enough to let them have the bat, and he get some exercise fielding. But that is not how power people generally act.

     The others, Dad can’t afford a bat, somebody has pinched theirs, he has to help a mate shift to another rented house, he is not feeling good after raising his spirits last night, can’t be bothered with these damned kids, got too many worries to set aside, too depressed and negative.
     • UncookedSelachimorpha 1.1.1

       31 May 2017 at 10:45 am

       And the other dad has worked 70 hours at his three minimum wage jobs and is too tired to play cricket
   • NZJester 1.2

     31 May 2017 at 12:09 pm

     The boys look very nervous and intent on protecting their junk. They know National Party members are known for hurting people where it is most painful. Including their own.
2. ianmac 2

   31 May 2017 at 8:31 am

   But Bill is looking deeply into the future while the kids know their place which is stand still and be grateful. So apt.
   • AB 2.1

     31 May 2017 at 2:40 pm

     Yeah – but go to the next frame. Jacinda has just bowled one on a good length nipping in a little from outside off.
     Bill has misjudged the length, gone leg-side, missed and will shortly be regretting not wearing a box. Kids behind the stumps will erupt in glee – Bill will call them “pretty useless” as he limps off. Scoreboard reads:
     “W. English retired hurt 0”
3. The decrypter 3

   31 May 2017 at 8:50 am

   That is not a bat double dipper is wielding ,its a cleaver.
   • Bearded Git 3.1

     31 May 2017 at 12:51 pm

     In the picture English has just made a slog to cow corner which is symbolic of the crude policies and actions of this government. It’s a 20-20 administration.

     I look forward to Little’s elegant off-drive at the Basin Reserve.
     • AB 3.1.1

       31 May 2017 at 2:47 pm

       And why is he playing cricket in a ‘business’ shirt instead of a tee-shirt like a normal person?
4. Bill 4

   31 May 2017 at 8:54 am

   Not that any of the children appear enthusiastic or anything, but I’m thinking the wee boy at his shoulder looks particularly unimpressed and fed up.
5. roy cartland 5

   31 May 2017 at 8:55 am

   Ah but look closely at the stumps. They’re askew… is his shoe back-kicking into them? Has he hit what he thinks is a golden six, but instead flubbed his own base and is too hubrid to realise, shamefully blundering out for a duck?
6. Draco T Bastard 6

   31 May 2017 at 9:04 am

   I look at that picture and see the delusional US.
7. Carolyn_nth 7

   31 May 2017 at 9:07 am

   Number two son is leaning towards the red team, behind dad’s back.
8. left_forward 8

   31 May 2017 at 9:16 am

   Absolutely spot on MS.
   Unsurprisingly the ‘inclusive – free play’ beach cricket metaphor is entirely missed here by the Nats. Choosing instead the imagery of the competitive selfish dad, demonstrating his individual prowess in whacking the ball – with some poor child having to run and collect it from the pond.
9. Adrian Thornton 9

   31 May 2017 at 9:37 am

   I hate to be negative here, but when it comes to having bad PR strategists Labour is doing pretty good itself…whomever is handling Little’s PR should be taken out side and beaten with sticks…imagine letting your party leader go on RNZ yesterday to let himself get into some low rent debate about the tiny details in the National budget, just embarrassing for Little, and for no gain whatsoever.

   Like it or nor public optics are important, and how they are handled is vital in today’s politics, and especially when your political parties are fundamentally now so similar.

   What ever you want to say about Key, you have to admit he had the slickest PR team NZ has ever seen in politics…remember this beautifully handled masterpiece from his PR team….
   …Key loses the flag referendum,…that same week two magazines have Key and his wife on the front cover of one, and Keys wife on the other, now that just didn’t happen, that was planned and set up months before, win or lose, those positive cover stories helped Key and National…that is how you do political PR.

   I am certainly not endorsing this type of politicking, but you can’t help but admire it’s effective delivery, I mean they helped turn and maintain the image of an arsehole multimillionaire gambling addict as just a regular bloke that you would want to have at your BBQ.
   • marty mars 9.1

     31 May 2017 at 9:42 am

     Why be negative at all – what’s the point? what are you getting from being negative and picky?

     You’ve spent 99% of your comment gushing about the gnats.
     • Adrian Thornton 9.1.1

       31 May 2017 at 2:20 pm

       Listen you idiot, as I have said before, if you can’t reply on my comments without adding an insult then fucking well don’t, is that clear to you?
       • marty mars 9.1.1.1

         31 May 2017 at 2:27 pm

         What insult?
   • Robert Guyton 9.2

     31 May 2017 at 10:15 am

     ” you would want to have at on your BBQ.”

     fify
     • David Mac 9.2.1

       31 May 2017 at 12:56 pm

       ‘pssst, that’s not the seating plan, it’s the menu…could you take your clothes off and roll in this please?’
   • David Mac 9.3

     31 May 2017 at 11:12 am

     I think here is the place to have conversations like this, we’re all voting left regardless. Election campaigning is show business. I don’t think Andrew or Bill are particularly bad showmen, they’re just not natural song and dance men. John was jolly good at it, got picked for a lead role every school play. Bill and Andy started as trees and peaked with 2 of the 3 wise men.

     Yes Adrian, given Labour’s primary objection to the budget it was inevitable that interviewers would be drilling down to questions that revolve around percentages and numbers, with babies and without, part-time vs fulltime workers. I think you’re right, Andy needed to try and avoid the boring confusing finer details, say something like..

     “I could go into the finer details but frankly, it would be jolly boring and confusing radio. For those interested in those details, they’re on the Labour website. The fact remains: 44,000 Kiwi families will come out of this budget with less money. We don’t think that’s fair.”

     It doesn’t matter if we like or not, politics is show business and it’s a show that not many kiwis are interested in. Attention must be grabbed. The stage lighting all gets turned up to full at election time. Andy doesn’t need to be Bono, a Leonard Cohen would work too.
     • weka 9.3.1

       31 May 2017 at 11:18 am

       “we’re all voting left regardless.”

       Some people are going to vote Peters/NZF, which risks a 4th term Nact got, or a Labour dragged further to the centre one.

       Leonard Cohen, crikey.
       • David Mac 9.3.1.1

         31 May 2017 at 11:46 am

         Yeah weka, that situation intrigues me. It may well be a trend that continues with Shane jumping into Winston’s Waka.

         I think as we age we become conservative, I don’t mean in a political sense, I mean we accumulate stuff to conserve. Memories, toys, family, property. Different things do become more important to us. A family BBQ over a night of lasers and thumping music.

         Winston pitches right into this group, it’s as much an age thing as it is a political persuasion thing. It’s a group of people that is expanding at a helluva rate. It’s a group of people that do watch the news, they can name 10 politicians, they care about NZ’s wellbeing. They’re the people with a few $ in their pockets.

         The MOU is being under utilised. Let the Greens skew towards the youngsters, Labour could address this trend you speak of and start asking some of these people “So why Winston?” and addressing whatever is pushing their Jump Ship buttons.

         A Fedora does amazing things for Andy’s swagger.
     • JamieB 9.3.2

       1 June 2017 at 7:02 am

       Come out with less money, or come out with a smaller increase than other demographics?

       They are quite different things.
10. marty mars 10

    31 May 2017 at 9:40 am

    And Bill English has just smacked the ball and lost it – that photo DOES show everything wrong with English and the gnats – love it
11. BM 11

    31 May 2017 at 10:00 am

    If you knew anything about cricket, you’d know that those kids are the slip field.

    The look on the kid’s faces is no doubt annoyance with the bowler’s poor line and length, down leg again so off to the boundary for another four or six, depending if English has got his eye in yet.
    • marty mars 11.1

      31 May 2017 at 10:08 am

      Check out the faces of the kids mate – english is just losing votes like a bucket with holes in it – we’ve all seen wankers like that when they play kids cricket.
    • joe90 11.2

      31 May 2017 at 10:08 am

      His follow-through says the ball’s over the fence and as we all know, over the fence is OUT!.
    • mauī 11.3

      31 May 2017 at 10:37 am

      What sort of wanker smashes the ball over midwicket when there’s kids waiting behind you for catching practice. Their hands aren’t even ready for a catch so demoralised are they seeing Bill reliving his glory days for the Gore XI.

      Any normal polly would be wicketkeeping as Jack comes into bowl to Mary, that way Bill can still be the centre of it all and show he cares about other people. Odds on he would be sledging the kids from behind the stumps though.
    • left_forward 11.4

      31 May 2017 at 11:06 am

      Yes, yes, got it BM – Bill’s like a gladiator, wielding his sword, ruthlessly punishing the poor quality delivery, cutting through the crap and winning the day, and not sparing a moment’s thought for the loser – perfect image for a nat leader.
    • AB 11.5

      31 May 2017 at 3:11 pm

      No way all those kids are in the slips. If the shot is taken from about mid-off the guy in the middle is the keeper, the girl’s at first slip and the boy in red is at an unusually fine leg-slip.
      To me it looks like Bill has made a silly, over-confident hack at one – trying to hoick it from around off through wide mid-on.
      Highly unlikely that he’s hit it at all what with lifting his head like that, As I said up-thread, most likely it’s seamed back at him and got him flush in the nuts.
      He’s about as good at batting as John Key is at hammering nails.
      The beatific smile on his face is ludicrous too – no real player ever does that because they are too focused and intense.
12. saveNZ 12

    31 May 2017 at 10:13 am

    Love to see this approach, for our NZ election. It’s racing up the music charts and overtaking the pop stars!

    ‘Liar Liar’ song about Theresa May soars to number two in iTunes download chart
    • weka 12.1

      31 May 2017 at 11:15 am

      they presumably has less stringent electioneering rules in the UK 😉
      • shorts 12.1.1

        31 May 2017 at 12:27 pm

        seems they have similar rules if not virtually the same – radio et al in the UK can’t play the song – I wonder if the Darren Watson case here has been noted regarding freedom of expression, hence no take down of youtube nor iTunes

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darren_Watson
        • weka 12.1.1.1

          31 May 2017 at 1:16 pm

          Thanks, that’s good to know, and it does make sense that it’s still on youtube then
      • saveNZ 12.1.2

        31 May 2017 at 2:37 pm

        Isn’t it called freedom of speech?
        • weka 12.1.2.1

          31 May 2017 at 3:14 pm

          By some. But I’m grateful for electioneering rules, other wise the rich conservatives would be controlling the story even more than they already do.
    • AB 12.2

      31 May 2017 at 3:20 pm

      I see May uses the “brighter future” slogan too.
      We need a “Bullshit Bingo – Crosby Textor Version”
13. greywarshark 13

    31 May 2017 at 10:13 am

    That’s not Bill English, it’s a cardboard cut-out.

    That’s my first photo-op for the day, Bill tells his loving and supportive wife.

    I’m sorry he says, that the stresses of Parliament have stymied our wish field a cricked team of our own.

    An admiring media hound or sycophant says to Bill, ‘You batted that away well”. and he answers with his iconic wry grin, “Yes, that’s what I do best”.
    • Draco T Bastard 13.1

      31 May 2017 at 1:57 pm

      Think Bill’s got about eleven kids so could field his own cricket team. Probably explains why he got the tax payer to pay for his Wellington home and the cleaning.
    • Robert Guyton 13.2

      31 May 2017 at 2:59 pm

      That’s not Bill English, it’s a cardboard cut-out.

      fify
14. Ant 14

    31 May 2017 at 11:20 am

    The kids glazed and expressionless like the non-voting youth of our country….
15. weka 15

    31 May 2017 at 11:20 am

    here’s the updated version of the photo, with handy notes 😉

    “Clint Smith‏ @ClintVSmith

    I love that the Nats’ new infographic has English trying to smash away the ball at a kids’ cricket match and getting bowled instead.”

    https://twitter.com/ClintVSmith/status/869687538897657856
    • left_forward 15.1

      31 May 2017 at 11:32 am

      Haha – an alternative truth!
      I didn’t think he had the look of somebody with sufficient focus and coordination to hit a ball.
      • weka 15.1.1

        31 May 2017 at 12:03 pm

        I reckon he’s photoshopped in. Not a real game or even a real photoshoot.
16. shorts 16

    31 May 2017 at 12:28 pm

    it really is a testament of our times

    grown up hogs bat and judging by the kids faces the grown up also refuses to share hence the look of sad realisation they’ll never get to bat

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