Caption contest
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- Date published:
2:53 pm, June 28th, 2014 - 79 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour, social media lolz -
Tags: Nicky kaye, paula bennett
79 comments on “Caption contest ”
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- National’s support base is wobbling
If ACT leader David Seymour intended the Treaty Principles Bill to drive a wedge into National’s support base, he may well already be succeeding. By midnight on Thursday after the Maori Party haka in Parliament, National MPs were being deluged with emails and messages from their members calling them out ...1 hour ago - 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #46
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I cannot stop grabbing people by the lapels, or shoulders, or similar, and raving at them about the tiny miracles in my ears.I can hear again! There could not be a more satisfied customer in all the world.In a noisy cafe I am even catching words that Karren cannot, she ...1 day ago - Unintended Consequences
Take the baitYou pay the priceIt's much too lateFor good adviceYou know and I know that our good things' throughBecause there's consequences for what we doConsequences for me and youWriters: Kevin Robert Hayes, David Nagier, Bonnie Adele Hayes.Fallout from the first readingOne News began last night by saying that tens ...2 days ago - Thank you, driver!
Today, Saturday 16th of November, is Auckland Transport’s Bus Driver Appreciation Day! Saturday 16 November marks the third annual Auckland Transport (AT) ‘Bus Driver Appreciation Day’, and this year we are encouraging all of New Zealand to thank their driver or let the bus go first if you are in ...2 days ago - Totally Normal: Holiday Edition
Hi,If I was to accurately sum up my mental state over the week, I’d just say that I got a huge fright from my own shadow.I’d nipped out for an 11pm neighborhood stroll, just to calm down after a day of stress and screens. The Cure and Fazerdaze’s new record ...2 days ago - We Are Not Listening
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3 days ago - More lawlessness from National
On Tuesday, sick of government stonewalling, the Waitangi Tribunal issued a rare court order, ordering the Minister of Health to release unredacted documents within 48 hours showing its reasoning for disestablishing Te Aka Whai Ora, the Māori Health Authority. The government's response to the lawful order of a court? Yeah, ...3 days ago - National’s tyrannical “foreign interference” law
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- Auckland chafing at Bishop’s housing intensification orders
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Only two months ago, Nicola Willis had to step in to stop Health New Zealand cutting tea and toast for post-birth parents, and now Lester Levy is riding to the rescue with a welcome message for all: our health workers can once again drink Milo, and will no longer need ...3 days ago - Gordon Campbell on the folly of making apologies in a social vacuum.
Day One of the Treaty Principles Bill…and everyone got what they wanted, and did what they liked. Heated words were exchanged. Culturally appropriate acts of outrage were performed. David Seymour got to play the victim card. Willie Jackson got kicked out of class. A comically red-faced Mr Speaker bellowed “Order, ...3 days ago - Skeptical Science New Research for Week #46 2024
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- Voices echo
5 days ago - Hīkoi over the Harbour
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This is Aaron Smale.Journalist Aaron Smale appearing as a witness at the Royal Commission. Newsroom Screenshot.For eight years he has covered the abuse of children and others in state institutions.For eight years he has helped to bring to light the many lies and coverups by the Crown.He has written some ...7 days ago - Monday 11 November 2024
Today the Hīkoi mō Te Tiriti set off from Te Rerenga Wairua and is making its way through the North, stopping in Whangārei for the night. In union news, it has been announced that plastic factory Sistema is likely to cut up to 100 jobs. A new report written by ...7 days ago
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Diabetes rates are rising, yet the government remains hyper-focused on short-term cost reduction and is not considering wider prevention measures. Photo: Getty ImagesKia ora. Long stories short, here’s my top six things to note in Aotearoa’s political economy around housing, climate and poverty on Monday, November 11: Diabetes rates are ...7 days ago - New Zealand was the training ground for the 2024 US election
Much of the internet is bots.There are more bots every day. Every site that's in any way bot-trainable has bots scraping posts and chats.We have AI. It can auto-recognise voices. It can mine text for information which it can categorise and file, but cannot process it or use to further ...1 week ago - 2024 SkS Weekly Climate Change & Global Warming News Roundup #45
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You take a mortal manAnd put him in controlWatch him become a GodWatch people's heads a-rollJust like the pied piperLed rats through the streetsWe dance like marionettesSwaying to the symphony of destructionSong: Dave Mustaine.Look over there, not here.The problem is, I told myself this morning as I contemplated that Q&A ...1 week ago - Nicola Deflects As National Spend Big on Roads
Nicola Willis says the multi-generation i-Rex ferries were too expensive for her - and has reportedly thrown away ~$1bn of taxpayers money in the process, and offended NZ's sixth largest trading partner.But Willis and National have now committed a minimum of $3bn to build:"less than 2km of one car lane ...1 week ago
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A jolting moment in a movie a can stay with you for the longest, longest time. Those Hitchcock birds; human remains in Cambodia’s Killing Fields; what remains of the Statue of Liberty on the beach; Thelma, Louise, their Thunderbird.Sometimes we’re simply taking our imagination for a ride into a dark ...1 week ago - Fact brief – Is there an expert consensus on human-caused global warming?
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2022, directed by Hanna Bergholm Hatching is a movie that I can genuinely imagine being used to teach film analysis in high school English. I know it’s not actually in English, but unless the rules have changed that doesn’t disqualify it – after the comparatively insipid The Sixth Sense in ...1 week ago - Making It Make Sense – What Happened, and What We Need To Look Out For With Media
Until Nicola Willis used the phrase to describe her 2024 Budget, this phrase “It’s Always Darkest Before The Dawn” was one of comfort - and often - truth.“It’s Always Darkest Before the Dawn”I think ultimately, it stands true - even if we don’t know how long a period of upheaval ...1 week ago - We Need The Journalists & Newsrooms That Remain
This is a repost of an article I wrote on social media. It was published before this week’s announcement of TVNZ cuts.I often reflect on how much hysteria there was around Golriz Ghahraman - journalists parked outside her home for a week after she admitted fault.The hyper-attention and headlines they ...1 week ago - Pelosi turns on Harris, low key
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Wastee little weaselWants cheap tricksLiberty bell cracked in halfA bacon steakA perfect matchFreedom of '76Song: Ween, Ed WilsonToday is World Freedom Day, an American commemoration that began in 2001 to recognise the fall of the Berlin Wall, some 12 years earlier. Seems odd timing to start acknowledging something in late ...1 week ago - Dawn Chorus for weekend of Nov 9/10
Here’s my top six news and other links on Saturday, November 9 for your weekend reading pleasure:Scoop: 'The risk of death is higher': What Cabinet knew when it raised speed limits on our roads NZ Herald-$$$’s Simon WilsonScoop: Five firms to review retrofit of Dunedin hospital, rather than new build ...1 week ago - The End of Austerianism?
Does the Autumn 2024 British budget point to a change in fiscal strategies?Many countries found their fiscal position was unsustainable, following the 2008 Global Financial Crash. Their public spending was well in excess of their public revenue and they had to borrow more heavily than lenders thought prudent. Almost unanimously, ...1 week ago - The Trump victory – do people accept democracy?
Image Credit: Council of Europe. Manual for Human Rights Education with Young People I didn’t have a dog in the fight—if I were a US ... 1 week ago- Sifting through the wreckage.
Although I shared some thoughts about the US election on other social media platforms, here are some items that emerged from the wreckage: Campaigns based on hope do not always defeat campaigns based on fear. Having dozens of retired high … Continue reading ...1 week ago- Sissy
2022, directed by Hannah Barlow and Kane Senes You know that thing where a character just keeps on making bad decision after bad decision as everything goes to shit around them? I can’t stand that thing. Snowballing consequences can be done really well when all of a character’s choices make ...1 week ago- Friday 8 November 2024
The Treaty Principles Bill has been introduced to Parliament, with its First Reading set down for next week. A large hīkoi is set to depart from Te Rerenga Wairua on Monday, with events planned as they head down the motu to Parliament. In employment news, NZDF staff have escalated strike ...1 week ago- Just Let Them Walk All Over You
Just let them walk all over youLaugh through the punches and the painLet the life-blood drain away from youThey're right, you're wrongAnd you can see it in the way they look at youFeel it in the way they treat youAlways the last to knowAlways the first to leaveBetween Two Points ...1 week ago - Sifting through the wreckage.
- Release: Growing pressure to scrap Section 7AA Repeal Bill
The newly released Section 7AA Repeal Bill's select committee report is further evidence that the Government should scrap it. ...12 hours ago - Government’s move to monetise access to nature a slippery slope
The Green Party is voicing serious concerns over the Government’s proposal to charge for access to public conservation land, released today. ...3 days ago - Green Party condemns the passage of Treaty Principles Bill
The Green Party condemns the passing of the Treaty Principles Bill at first reading, and is clear that the fight is not over. ...4 days ago
- Stand Up for Te Tiriti
Te Tiriti o Waitangi is our country’s founding document. It forms the basis of the relationship between Māori and the Crown – and the Aotearoa New Zealand we live in today. ...4 days ago
- Release: Over 15,000 sign Labour’s open letter to Luxon
As the hīkoi to Parliament continues, Labour has sent an open letter to Prime Minister Christopher Luxon in a last-ditch attempt to get him to kill the Treaty Principles Bill. ...4 days ago
- Fast Track Bill threatens environment, climate and reputation
The fast-track legislation passing its second reading in Parliament is another step towards environmental ruin. ...4 days ago
- Greens join King’s Counsel in calling for Treaty Principles Bill to be abandoned
The Prime Minister must answer the call from a group of senior lawyers of the King’s Counsel to abandon the divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...4 days ago
- Chris Hipkins’ apology statement to state and faith-based care survivors
...6 days ago
- Release: Labour formally apologises to state and faith-based care survivors
Labour joins with the Government in unreservedly apologising for the abuse, neglect and trauma including torture in state and faith-based care and for ignoring the voices of survivors for too long. ...6 days ago
- Green Party stands in support of survivors of abuse in care
Today, the Green Party stands alongside the survivors of abuse in state care and faith-based care as the Government issues an historic apology. ...6 days ago
- Green Party calls for conscience vote on Treaty Principles Bill
The Green Party has written to the Speaker of the House requesting he enable a personal vote on the Treaty Principles Bill. ...7 days ago
- Govt move to exclude journalist risks chilling effect
The Green Party is alarmed by the Government’s move to exclude a journalist from covering this week’s apology for the survivors of abuse in state and faith-based care. ...7 days ago
- Without action, an apology will be empty air
For tomorrow’s apology to survivors of abuse in state and faith-based care to hold any water, the Government must not pursue the same policies that drove the abuse in the first place. ...7 days ago
- Release: Concerns remain over tobacco interference
Concerns about the tobacco industry’s ability to interfere in government policy making remain, despite the inability of the Office of the Auditor-General to investigate the Government’s decision to halve the excise tax on heated tobacco products. ...1 week ago
- Urgent wake-up call on climate
The Climate Change Commission’s latest advice indicates Aotearoa needs to be stepping up on climate action. ...1 week ago
- Green MP’s Meme-ber’s Bill set to save the world
Break out the punchlines and dust off your meme folder: Green Party MP Kahurangi Carter’s Copyright (Parody and Satire) Amendment Bill was pulled from the Ballot yesterday. ...1 week ago
- Release: Poroporoaki: Ta Robert (Bom) Gillies
Kua hinga te manawa kairākau o Te Rua Tekau Ma Waru Tiwhatiwha te po! Kakarauru i te po! Ka rapuhia kei hea koe kua riro! Haere e te Ika a Whiro ki o tini hoa kua ngaro atu ki te Pō ...1 week ago
- Labour, Greens and Te Pāti Māori call on the Prime Minister to block the Treaty Principles Bill
The opposition parties stand united for an Aotearoa that honours Te Tiriti, rather than seeking to rewrite it. Labour, the Greens and Te Pāti Māori are working together against the Government’s divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour, Greens and Te Pāti Māori call on the Prime Minister to block the Treaty Principle...
The opposition parties stand united for an Aotearoa that honours Te Tiriti, rather than seeking to rewrite it. Labour, the Greens and Te Pāti Māori are working together against the Government’s divisive Treaty Principles Bill. ...2 weeks ago
- NZ must pursue independent foreign policy
The Green Party says the need is greater than ever for Aotearoa New Zealand to pursue an independent foreign policy. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Winston Peters must apologise
The Deputy Prime Minister should apologise to the public servant he named and blamed for something they did not do, and for misusing the rules of Parliament. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Government continues to fail small business
The Government is leaving small businesses high and dry in difficult economic times, by letting big business get away with not paying their bills. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Unemployment rising under National
Nicola Willis’ policies continue to slow the economy with more Kiwis out of work as a result. ...2 weeks ago
- Near four-year high unemployment reveals dire need for new direction
Today, Statistics New Zealand’s latest labour market report revealed that unemployment has reached 4.8 per cent, the highest rate since late 2020, during the COVID pandemic. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Shovels in the ground this term unlikely
National looks set to break another election promise, this time by not beginning construction on a second Mt Victoria tunnel this term, Labour transport spokesperson Tangi Utikere said. ...2 weeks ago
- Not too late to abandon the Bill, Christopher
The Green Party is urgently calling on Prime Minister Christopher Luxon to abandon the Treaty Principles Bill following reports it will be introduced on Thursday. ...2 weeks ago
- Coalition Govt’s expensive tunnel vision for Wellington comes at the expense of the regions
A second Mount Victoria tunnel, a duplicate Terrace tunnel alongside highway widening will dump more traffic in the centre of Wellington and result in more pollution. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Government’s disgrace for Christchurch homeowners
The Government is backtracking on existing commitments to do the right thing by homeowners let down by EQC (now the Natural Hazards Commission). ...2 weeks ago
- Release: National’s FamilyBoost a colossal flop
Nicola Willis continues to over promise and under deliver, with most families receiving only $30 a week from National’s flagship FamilyBoost flop. ...2 weeks ago
- Ngarewa-Packer Demands Support for Palestine Ceasefire from New Plymouth Mayor
Te Pāti Māori Co-Leader and MP for Te Tai Hauāuru, Debbie Ngarewa-Packer is calling on the Mayor for New Plymouth, Neil Holdom, to do the right thing. “I am shocked at his decision to disregard the petition presented by Palestine Solidarity Taranaki calling for an immediate and permanent ceasefire”, said ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Trade deal with Gulf states welcomed
Labour welcomes the conclusion of a trade deal with the Gulf Cooperation Council (GCC) that was restarted under a Labour government after languishing for many years. ...2 weeks ago
- Release: Labour welcomes OAG fast track inquiry
The Government should consider the outcome of an Auditor-General report into conflicts of interest before progressing the Fast track Approvals Bill through Parliament. ...2 weeks ago
- Greens reignite call for free dental
A new report detailing the enormous social and economic costs of our dental system has reignited the Greens' call for free dental care. ...2 weeks ago
- Greens call for bottom trawling ban and call out Minister for lacklustre response
The Green Party is urgently calling on the Government to ban bottom trawling, following news a New Zealand bottom trawler caught 37kg of coral in international waters, prompting the suspension of all fishing in the area until 2026. ...2 weeks ago
- Mark Patterson: Farmers understand we have their backs
Spring is here which means the start of the A&P show season. Those treasured community days where town meets country. There's no rural-urban divide here, just a chance to meet up with family and old friends and celebrate all things that make rural New Zealand so special. I'm embarking on ...3 weeks ago - Release: Funding for Gumboot Friday should pause
The National Government should review its support for Gumboot Friday after unacceptable comments by its leader and champion Mike King. ...3 weeks ago
- Louise Upston cherry-picks data to punch down on the poor
The Government has very conveniently cherry-picked data from the latest MSD projections to justify its cruel agenda and punch-down policy when it comes to people living in poverty. ...3 weeks ago
- Luxon needs to address the cow in the room
The Green Party was appalled to hear Prime Minister Christopher Luxon claim we are “doing everything we can” on climate change, while his government does nothing to address emissions in our most polluting sector. ...3 weeks ago
- Launching the White Ribbon Ride
The Minister for the Prevention of Family and Sexual Violence, Karen Chhour, was on hand to wish riders well at the start of the North Island leg of the White Ribbon Ride in Whakatāne this morning. The ride helps mark the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women, ...14 hours ago - Construction to begin on next stage of Papakura to Drury
Construction on the next stage of the SH1 Papakura to Drury project will begin early next month, with the contract for works awarded to Fulton Hogan, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says. "SH1 Papakura to Drury is a key project that will drive economic growth and productivity, reduce congestion, and enable people ...2 days ago
- NZ signs trade deal with Costa Rica, Iceland and Switzerland
Trade and Agriculture Minister Todd McClay has signed a pioneering trade agreement that prioritises New Zealand’s sustainable exports at a ceremony during APEC in Peru today. “The Agreement on Trade and Sustainability (ACCTS), between Costa Rica, Iceland, and Switzerland was concluded in July of this year and opens up significant ...2 days ago
- Government and iwi work together on aquaculture
Five new Aquaculture Settlement Areas will help ensure Ngāi Tahu shares in the opportunities aquaculture offers for Southland’s economy, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. “The Aquaculture Settlement Areas (ASAs) I’m announcing today set aside space so the Crown and Ngāi Tahu can assess their potential for aquaculture development. ...3 days ago
- Government launches review to ensure electricity market is fit-for-purpose
The terms of reference for a review of the performance of the electricity market have been released. The review, initiated by the Coalition Government during the power crisis in winter will look at whether current regulations and market design support economic growth and access to reliable and affordable electricity, Energy Minister ...3 days ago
- Speech to Social Investment Hui: Jack and his whānau need our help
Kia ora koutou katoa. Nau mai, haere mai, piki mai. Ki te mihi atu ahau, ki te manwhenua nei, Te Atiawa, Ngāti toa rangatira, tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou katoa. Thank you, Andy, for your introduction. Let me acknowledge you as the new Chief Executive of the Social Investment ...3 days ago
- Minister of State for Trade heads to Brisbane for PACER Plus meeting
Minister of State for Trade Nicola Grigg has travelled to Australia to attend the PACER Plus Ministers Meeting in Brisbane. “Trade plays a critical role in driving employment, economic growth, and improving the standards of living in the Pacific Region. The Government is strongly committed to supporting Pacific Island countries ...3 days ago
- Proposals to modernise conservation released
Toitū te taiao – Our environment endures The Government is consulting on proposals to modernise New Zealand’s conservation management system, aiming to protect relevant natural areas while supporting sustainable growth in tourism and regional economies, Conservation Minister Tama Potaka says. “Today, the Department of Conservation – Te Papa Atawhai is ...3 days ago
- Treaty Principles Bill passes first reading
Associate Justice Minister David Seymour says all New Zealanders will now be able to have their say on the Treaty Principles Bill after it passed its first reading and was sent to the Justice Committee to be considered. “I look forward to seeing what Kiwis have to say on the ...4 days ago
- Antarctic cooperation at centre of Scott Base visit
Finance Minister and Associate Climate Change Minister Nicola Willis will travel to Antarctica next week to engage with international partners and scientists and to assess latest steps in the redevelopment of Scott Base. “New Zealand has important interests in Antarctica and our longstanding presence at Scott Base is a key ...4 days ago
- Contactless payments launching on public transport in Auckland
The Government and Auckland Council are delivering contactless payments on Auckland’s public transport network later this month which will enable commuters to tag on and off public buses, trains, and ferries travelling across the region, Transport Minister Simeon Brown and Auckland Mayor Wayne Brown says.The NZ Transport Agency (NZTA) and ...4 days ago
- RIF funding supports aquaculture development
The Coalition Government is backing the development of an aquaculture centre of excellence in Southland with an investment of $2.2 million, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones says. South Island Industrial Fund Ltd will use the Regional Infrastructure Fund (RIF) loan towards its $6.3m project to upgrade infrastructure at the Ocean ...4 days ago
- Safeguarding Kiwis with modern insurance law
Modernised insurance law will provide Kiwis with confidence that they will be treated fairly by insurance providers, Commerce and Consumer Affairs Minister Andrew Bayly says. “A secure insurance market is integral to New Zealand’s economic success. It enables consumers and businesses to access finance and gives them the assurance to ...4 days ago
- When the going gets tough ‘Get Through’ with Farmstrong
An online hub with mental wellbeing tools and resources designed to help farmers and growers deal with the stress of adverse weather events has been officially launched by Minister for Mental Health, Matt Doocey. “Adverse weather events are an increasingly common reality for our farmers and growers. It’s vital that ...4 days ago
- Government exploring new energy source
Up to $60 million will be ring-fenced from the Regional Infrastructure Fund to invest in exploring the potential of supercritical geothermal technology which could help secure New Zealand’s future energy needs, Regional Development Minister Shane Jones and Science, Innovation, and Technology Minister Judith Collins say. Having a secure and resilient energy supply ...4 days ago
- Pay Gap Calculator toolkit launched
New Zealand businesses can now take meaningful action to drive down the gender pay gap with the launch of an online calculator today, Minister for Women Nicola Grigg says. “Women are paid, on average, 8.2 per cent less than men and this gap has barely moved since 2017 - which ...5 days ago
- Government launches refreshed Public Private Partnership framework
The Government has released a refreshed Public Private Partnership (PPP) framework that provides a blueprint to the market outlining how the government will approach future PPP transactions, Infrastructure Minister Chris Bishop and Parliamentary Under-Secretary Simon Court say. “Refreshing New Zealand’s PPP model is an important part of our plan to ...5 days ago
- Further decisions taken on regulating online casino gambling
Internal Affairs Minister Brooke van Velden says the Government has agreed to further details of a new system to regulate online casino gambling. “A new Online Gambling Bill will be drafted with the purpose to regulate online casino gambling to facilitate a safer and compliant regulated online gambling market. More importantly, ...5 days ago
- Tailored support for people in emergency housing
Ka mate kāinga tahi, ka ora kāinga rua. An innovative Government trial will tailor support to people with a diverse range of complex needs to move out of emergency housing and into more permanent housing, Associate Housing Minister Tama Potaka says. “The Government has set a target of reducing the ...5 days ago
- Getting ready for bird flu
Biosecurity Minister Andrew Hoggard is encouraging New Zealanders to take steps to be ready for the possible arrival of bird flu.“While high pathogenicity avian influenza (HPAI) is still some distance from New Zealand and we’ve never had a case here, it’s important that we take a cautious approach. “If you’re one ...5 days ago
- Harbour closure supports mussel reseeding
A two-year ban on the take of kuku/mussels from Ōhiwa Harbour in eastern Bay of Plenty will support local efforts to restore mussel beds in the area, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. Te Rūnanga o Ngāti Awa requested the closure, Te rāhui kuku ki tua o Kanawa, to ...5 days ago
- Government awards primary sector scholarships to tertiary students
The coalition Government has awarded scholarships to six tertiary students as part of efforts to boost on-the-ground support for farmers and growers Agriculture Minister Todd McClay and Associate Agriculture Minister Andrew Hoggard announced today. “We are reducing the regulatory burden on farmers and growers and providing support to adapt and innovate, ...5 days ago
- Tax work programme focused on rebuilding the economy
Rebuilding the economy and improving fiscal sustainability is the key focus of the Government’s new Tax and Social Policy Work Programme for Inland Revenue, Revenue Minister Simon Watts says. “New Zealand has been grappling with significant economic challenges over the last few years with many businesses and households feeling the ...5 days ago
- Omnibus Bill First Reading for Royal Commission of Inquiry National Apology
Mr Speaker, as the Minister for Children, it is my priority to ensure that children and young people in the care system are safe. The thousands of survivors who shared their experiences with the Royal Commission have been clear that the system must improve its protections against abuse and neglect. ...6 days ago
- Clarifying the protection of disabled people in care
The Government is amending the Crimes Act to ensure the protection of disabled people in care is made more explicit, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “As part of the Government’s response to the recommendations of the Abuse in Care Royal Commission, the word ‘disability’ is being added to the definition ...6 days ago
- Oranga Tamariki Act changes a step in the right direction
Changes to the Oranga Tamariki Act 1989 included in an Omnibus Bill are long overdue and a positive step in the right direction, Minister for Children Karen Chhour says. As part of the National Apology today, the Responding to Abuse in Care Legislation Amendment Bill had its first reading. “I am ...6 days ago
- Improvements to Government record-keeping in response to the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse ...
Minister of Internal Affairs Brooke van Velden says the Government is making changes to the Public Records Act, to improve the record-keeping practices of government agencies. “These changes will allow the Chief Archivist to audit an agency more frequently where required and will also allow the Chief Archivist to work ...6 days ago
- Minister Peters completes successful visit to Chile
New Zealand and Chile have reaffirmed their strong partnership, including on security, trade, Antarctic issues, and people-to-people links, says Foreign Minister Winston Peters. “Chile is one of New Zealand’s closest and most like-minded partners in Latin America, and it is the gateway to the region for many New Zealanders,” Mr ...6 days ago
- ‘Foreign policy views from an Indo-Pacific neighbour’ – Speech on New Zealand fore...
Kia ora. Tēnā koutou katoa. And greetings from New Zealand. Thank you to Rector Devés and the University of Chile for hosting us today, and to Undersecretary de la Fuente and Professor López for the warm welcome and introductions. When a much younger person, walking on a bridge ...6 days ago
- Prime Minister apologises for abuse in care
Ngā kura mōrehu, Treasured survivors, kua ngaro, haere atu rā. those that have passed, farewell. Ngā kura mōrehu, Treasured survivors E whakawhaiti nei that have gathered here. Kei ngā rangatira To the esteemed leaders Tēnā koutou katoa. Greetings. I’d like to welcome you ...6 days ago
- Government apologises for abuse in care
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has apologised to all New Zealanders who were abused in the care of state and faith-based institutions. “This is a significant and sorrowful day in New Zealand,” Mr Luxon says. “Today, I am apologising on behalf of the Government to everyone who suffered abuse, harm and ...6 days ago
- Climate Change Minister to attend COP29 in Baku
Climate Change Minister Simon Watts will attend the 29th annual United Nations Climate Change Summit (COP29) in Baku, Azerbaijan, this week. “New Zealand is fully committed to meeting our climate targets and reducing the impacts of climate change. Every country has a role to play, and New Zealand will continue ...7 days ago
- Crown Observer appointed to Wellington City Council
Experienced local government practitioner Lindsay McKenzie has been appointed as a Crown Observer to Wellington City Council, Local Government Minister Simeon Brown says.“Wellington City Council is facing significant challenges in delivering services to its community, while balancing its debt and insurance obligations,” Mr Brown says.“The decision to appoint a Crown ...7 days ago
- Govt strengthens protection for people in state care
The Government is introducing several law changes to better protect people in state care, in response to the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse in Care. “The magnitude of the abuse detailed by the Royal Commission of Inquiry was heartbreaking, and as a Government we will do everything in our ...7 days ago
- Prime Minister to attend APEC Leaders’ Meeting
Prime Minister Christopher Luxon departs for Peru this week to attend the annual APEC Economic Leaders’ Meeting from 15-16 November. “The APEC Summit is a key moment in the regional calendar. It’s an opportunity to meet with counterparts who are also grappling with cost-of-living challenges and choices about driving more ...7 days ago
- First kina barren special permit approved
New rules allowing local communities to take direct action against kina barrens are starting to bear fruit, Oceans and Fisheries Minister Shane Jones says. “I’ve made kina barrens a priority, which is why I introduced a new special permit purpose this year to allow the removal and translocation of kina ...7 days ago
- Faster 110km/h speed limit to accelerate Kāpiti from 13 November
The new 110km/h speed limit on the Kāpiti Expressway Road of National Significance (RoNS) will come into effect on 13 November 2024, more than two weeks earlier than expected, Transport Minister Simeon Brown says.“Boosting economic growth and productivity is a priority for the Government. The new 110km/h speed limit will ...7 days ago
- Largest ever number of graduate vets to boost rural productivity and support farmers
Thirty-five graduate vets will join rural communities this year through the Voluntary Bonding Scheme (VBS) for Veterinarians, marking the largest intake in the scheme’s history, Agriculture Minister Todd McClay, and Associate Agriculture Minister Andrew Hoggard, announced today. “The Government is committed to enhancing primary sector productivity and delivering direct benefits ...7 days ago
- Stalking to become illegal and jailable offence
The Government has agreed to introduce legislation this year that will make stalking illegal with a maximum penalty of up to five years in prison, Justice Minister Paul Goldsmith says. “Every New Zealander deserves to feel safe in their community and this Government is committed to making sure victims are ...1 week ago
- Nationally significant sites to be upgraded
Me mihi ngakaunui ki a Tā Robert Gillies e ngaro nei ki tōna nui o Te Rua Tekau Mā Waru. Farewell to Sir Robert Gillies of the 28th (Māori) Battalion. The Government will provide $20.3 million in funding to improve two sites that have a special place in the hearts ...1 week ago
- Govt to ramp up anti-scam efforts, bringing public sector and banking industry together
New Zealanders have lost nearly $200m in the last year to scammers, it has been revealed. ...31 minutes ago - Hīkoi mō te Tiriti: Wellington commuters warned to expect hours-long delays when protest march arr...
There will be extra buses and train carriages to ease congestion, but it will still be "super busy". ...31 minutes ago
- Non-Māori lend their voices of support to the Hīkoi mō te Tiriti
Pākehā and tauiwi "need to make our stand clear about Te Tiriti", supporters say. ...51 minutes ago
- Treaty Principles Bill: Te Pāti Māori, ACT both claim victory over response to haka in Parliament
A video of MP Hana-Rawhiti Maipi-Clarke performing 'Ka Mate' has now been viewed hundreds of millions of times. ...57 minutes ago
- Ka tuku te rākau: Handing over the baton of protest to a new generation
As tens of thousands show their support for the hīkoi to parliament, the organisers are busy behind the scenes ensuring things run smoothly. For many, this is their first time leading a kaupapa of this scale – and it hasn’t all been easy. On August 31, an extraordinary hui was ...1 hour ago - Banks are grappling with a scam ‘crisis’ while Facebook profits from it
The CEOs of two major New Zealand banks say Facebook is rife with fraud – and that Meta is too busy making money from scam ads to try and stop them. Duncan Greive reports. The story would have been dystopian a few years ago, but is now routine, almost unremarkable. ...1 hour ago
- Newsroom daily quiz, Monday 18 November
Loading…(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){var ql=document.querySelectorAll('A[data-quiz],DIV[data-quiz]'); if(ql){if(ql.length){for(var k=0;k<ql.length;k++){ql[k].id='quiz-embed-'+k;ql[k].href="javascript:var i=document.getElementById('quiz-embed-"+k+"');try{qz.startQuiz(i)}catch(e){i.start=1;i.style.cursor='wait';i.style.opacity='0.5'};void(0);"}}};i['QP']=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)})(window,document,'script','https://take.quiz-maker.com/3012/CDN/quiz-embed-v1.js','qp');Got a good quiz question? Send Newsroom your questions.The post Newsroom daily quiz, Monday 18 November appeared first on Newsroom. ...1 hour ago - Nerves and uncertainty over Trump’s tariff plans
Donald Trump claimed victory in a fair election, voted in by Americans worried about the cost of living and lifted up by his promises to punish countries that are punishing America – by slapping tariffs on the world.“I guess it’s called democracy,” says trade specialist John Ballingall from Sense Partners, ...1 hour ago
- The march on Wellington
A redoubt was built on Mr Clifford’s property on Thorndon Flat in anticipation of war in 1846. It was simply a square earthwork with a surrounding trench. All round the parapet were wood-framed loopholes for musket-fire. A more extensive work was constructed at the Te Aro end of the town as a ...1 hour ago
- Daily crossword, Monday 18 November
.wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles article .entry-title { font-size: 1.2em; } .wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles .entry-meta { display: flex; flex-wrap: wrap; align-items: center; margin-top: 0.5em; } .wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles article .entry-meta { font-size: 0.8em; } .wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles article .avatar { height: 25px; width: 25px; } .wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles .post-thumbnail{ margin: 0; margin-bottom: 0.25em; } .wp-block-newspack-blocks-homepage-articles .post-thumbnail img { height: auto; width: 100%; ...1 hour ago
- Businesses will have to accept cash for essentials under government plan
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Michelle Grattan, Professorial Fellow, University of Canberra The Albanese government, anxious to prevent a dash from cash by businesses, says it will mandate that they must accept it for essential items. Treasurer Jim Chalmers and Assistant Treasurer Stephen Jones outlined the ...5 hours ago - NFP president slams Labour leader for ‘hallucinating’ about Fiji governance
By Anish Chand in Nadi, Fiji National Federation Party president Parmod Chand has described Fiji Labour Party leader Mahendra Chaudhry as a “self-professed champion of the poor” and criticised him over “hallucinating” about the country. Chand made the comment when responding to remarks made by Chaudhry during FLP’s Annual Delegates ...5 hours ago
- Hīkoi day 8: Significant disruption expected when thousands converge on capital
RNZ News New Zealand’s hīkoi against the Treaty Principles Bill could be one of the largest rallies that the capital has seen for years, Wellington City Council says. The Hīkoi mō te Tiriti will arrive in Wellington tomorrow, and locals are being warned to expect disruption and plan ahead. Yesterday, ...5 hours ago
- Hīkoi mō te Tiriti: Significant disruption expected when thousands converge on capital
Wellingtonians are being asked to plan ahead, while the PM says he'll "wait and see" as to whether he meets hīkoi participants. ...10 hours ago
- South Australian Labor gains Black at byelection with big swing
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Adrian Beaumont, Election Analyst (Psephologist) at The Conversation; and Honorary Associate, School of Mathematics and Statistics, The University of Melbourne Twitter A byelection occurred on Saturday in the South Australian Liberal-held state seat of Black. With all election day votes counted, ...12 hours ago
- Luxon to ‘push on’ with Trump amid tariff concerns
New Zealand must work with politicians like Donald Trump regardless of any polarising policies, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon has said at the conclusion of an international summit where the incoming ruler’s plans loomed large.Luxon took part in the annual leaders’ retreat at the Apec summit, held this year in Peru’s ...15 hours ago
- Trump win, 1.5C warming breach weigh on UN climate ‘finance COP’
By Sera Sefeti of BenarNews Pacific delegates fear the implications of a Trump presidency and breach of the 1.5 degree Celsius warming target will overshadow negotiations on climate finance at the UN’s annual COP talks that have started in Azerbaijan this week. At the COP29 summit — dubbed the “finance ...16 hours ago
- Survey warning on Papua ‘box ticking’ mega estates project goes unheeded
By Stephen Wright for Radio Free Asia Indonesia’s plan to convert over 2 million ha of conservation and indigenous lands into agriculture will cause long-term damage to the environment, create conflict and add to greenhouse gas emissions, according to a feasibility study document for the Papua region mega-project. The 96-page ...17 hours ago
- Xi Jinping tells Luxon face-to-face that New Zealand should see China as a partner not a threat
Analysis - Consider China an 'opportunity and partner rather than a challenge or threat' - that was the message Xi Jinping delivered to Christopher Luxon at their face-to-face meeting, according to Chinese state-run media. ...17 hours ago
- Police say they will crack down on Brian Tamaki convoy protesters
Those who walked on the motorway were "reckless, unlawful and extremely irresponsible", police say. ...18 hours ago
- Countries clash over emissions cuts at COP29
A week of late nights, tense exchanges and dozens of pages of draft negotiating texts have failed to make significant progress on the big issues up for discussion at COP29.On key agenda items – finance, carbon trading and how to implement last year’s commitment to transition away from fossil fuels, ...19 hours ago
- China’s potential response to NZ joining AUKUS ‘not a consideration’ – Luxon
China has raised its concerns about New Zealand being potentially involved in the intelligence and security pact AUKUS directly with the prime minister. ...20 hours ago
- Abuse in care: Journalist barred from accountability event for holding people accountable
Mediawatch - An award-winning journalist dedicated to reporting abuse in state care was briefly banned from the official apology. Why? And what did he make of it? ...20 hours ago
- Treaty Principles Bill: The speeches
The House - Much coverage has focussed on the protest that followed the speeches - but they themselves were enthusiastic, outraged, angry, even despairing. ...21 hours ago
- An Ode to .. Hana
Home alone“OK,” says Chris Luxon, CEO of Bottom Feed Enterprises.“I’m going out now to an important work event.Can I trust you to behave?”“Sure, Dad,” says Seymour. “I’m thirteen now.”“All right,” says Dad.“Call me if you need to – and remember,Whatever you do, don’t hit the Box with the Stick.”“Sure, Dad,” ...22 hours ago
- Treaty Principles Bill hīkoi: Thousands to set out for Porirua on day seven of march
There are only about 150km in total to go for those who have joined the hīkoi against the Treaty Principles Bill. ...23 hours ago
- Prime Minister Christopher Luxon to speak from APEC
The Prime Minister is in Peru at the APEC Summit. ...23 hours ago
- Prime Minister Christopher Luxon speaks from APEC
The Prime Minister is in Peru at the APEC Summit. ...23 hours ago
- Treaty Principles Bill: Seymour’s allegations around students taking part in hīkoi ‘inf...
The associate education minister says some schools are formally endorsing the hīkoi against his bill, flouting rules on political neutrality. ...24 hours ago
- Western media ‘parrots Israeli propaganda’ over Gaza, says analyst
Pacific Media Watch A media studies professor at Qatar’s Doha Institute for Graduate Studies has completed empirical studies examining Western media coverage of Israel’s war on Gaza — and his findings have been highly critical. Professor Mohamad Elmasry found that Western media have failed to do much more than “parrot ...1 day ago
- Bill to stop foreign interference ‘undermining core New Zealand interests’ introduced to...
The bill introduces new offences to criminalise covert, deceptive, corruptive or coercive activities on behalf of a foreign power to intentionally or recklessly harm the country. ...1 day ago
- Plea to bar Prabowo from UK as Indonesian security forces crack down on Papuan rally
Asia Pacific Report A West Papuan advocacy group for self-determination for the colonised Melanesians has appealed to the United Kingdom government to cancel its planned reception for new Indonesian President Prabowo Subianto. “Prabowo is a blood-stained war criminal who is complicit in genocide in East Timor and West Papua,” claimed an ...1 day ago
- Treaty Principles Bill haka: MPs must uphold standards of Parliament, Luxon says
Treaty issues are "emotional and difficult", but New Zealanders expect a certain level of behaviour in Parliament, the PM says. ...1 day ago
- China plays for power as Luxon manages differences
China is not generally known for its understated approach to diplomacy, but even by its usual standards, the country’s presence at this year’s Apec summit has been unavoidable.Large groups of supporters bearing miniature flags and banners of support have taken up residence outside the hotel accommodating Chinese president Xi Jinping ...1 day ago
- New Zealand inks ‘sustainable’ trade deal with Switzerland, Costa Rica and Iceland
The signed agreement will remove tariffs on hundreds of sustainable goods and services. ...2 days ago
- In photos: Hīkoi mō Te Tiriti so far, as the march gains momentum
From the mist-covered peaks of Te Rerenga Wairua to the plumes of geothermal steam in Rotorua, here are the key moments to date. ...2 days ago
- Meeting with Seymour ‘pointless’, say protest hīkoi organisers
RNZ News Thousands of people have joined the national hīkoi opposing the Treaty Principles Bill as it progresses south, with supporters lining State Highway 10 as it passes through Kerikeri en route to Kawakawa. Leaders of a hīkoi against David Seymour’s Treaty Principles Bill have rejected the ACT party leader’s ...2 days ago
- Watch: Christopher Luxon meets with China’s Xi Jinping
The Prime Minister has met China's leader on the sidelines of the APEC Summit. ...2 days ago
- Will Trump renew ‘maximum pressure’ against Iran – or could there be an opening for dialogue?
Source: The Conversation (Au and NZ) – By Ali Mamouri, Research Fellow, Middle East Studies, Deakin University With Donald Trump returning to the White House, the relationship between the US and Iran could change significantly. Trump’s unconventional foreign policy led to a period of heightened confrontation with Iran during ...2 days ago
- Watch live: Christopher Luxon meets with China’s Xi Jinping
The Prime Minister has met China's leader on the sidelines of the APEC Summit. ...2 days ago
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“It’s not about me, it’s about the Party”- John Key, June 2014
Ïf you thought Team NZ was expensive to run, try this!
Oim your Neshnool Ken Date – giggle giggle
Thirteen members of government will be leaving and taking up lucrative directorships.. Team Key .When looking after your mates comes first.
President of Sociopaths Anonymous , Paula Bennett, unveils new membership card.
Media shocked as Cabinet Minister, Paula Bennett, takes the piss out of John Key’s increasingly obvious Male Pattern Baldness.
Doesnt mention the word NATIONAL- is it toxic all ready
“Bedmates,” simpered coy Paula. “Yep. Slept with all of them except one.”
Please don’t do that to your sysop!
I nearly coffeed the keyboard.
What I wanna know is were they all at the same time? S’that how she lost so much weight so quickly.
i am currently pouring bleach into my skull to remove the stains of that mental image
I would’ve expected to see a comment like that on Whaleoil but not here. Wow.
😀
“Many of these people will be turning up at our WINZ offices in August – I want you to treat them especially well.”
Hah, without this man (JK) I would simply have remained nothing but a loud mouthed, smart-arsed, bullying, loathsome, greasing “bludger” and opportunist, now I have got it made, with stuff all brains, no significant skill and hardly any efforts.
For money, perks and power I will do anything! And I pulled the ladder up behind me, hahaha, you suckers.
bennett:..’you can smell the drone-strikes..!’
“I’m a little snot-goblin”
I Fake Everything.
And you all thought we were going to get a copy of John Key’s biography? This is even better. A farewell picture – oops!
Bennett holds up the new 2014 commemorative stamps to be released post election. The stamps are said to leave a particularly nasty taste in the mouth.
@ Awww
Best for originality. And supporting NZ Post presumably.
Nikki Kaye: see, this is how you do it, keep smiling for the cameras as you slide the stiletto in nice and deep.
Paula bennett wants to thank god she is not one of the “deadwood”, but he is busy signing books.
Nikki kaye smiles nervously while checking she is on the leaflet
@Tracy
+2
Paula shows off her copy of the new board game “Spot the Arsehole”
Paula and Nikki can’t wait to have the picture installed as a kitchen splash back.
Leave me alone – I’m not ready to come out and show my Hitler moustache yet
So excited! so excited! I can barely contain mys……….. oh no………forgot to wear my adult incontinence pads.
“These are the guys we don’t spy on”
…unless they’re baaad
Govt In Big Financial Trouble as it tries to sell New Range of Postage Stamps
Mrs Louis Saurez is just about to take a sneaky bite of of Team Key.
Team Nationals decision to re design the chess board had a subtle flaw
Nationals Fundraising Promotion of “Spot The Bastard”
The Government unveils required reading for the nursery school cirriculum.
No, I am not putting this down…Honestly I have shaved off my sideburns, beard and plucked my nasal hair…..honestly!
Whole Cast for Alien 5 revealed!
If you can see my lips move I am lying.
National Match Dot Dating Service, is initiated
The Spot The Bastard Competition this month, was a very difficult one
Christchurch residents resort to wanted posters due to the complete lack of assistance…
Air NZ get Paula Bennett to show off their new sick bags.
😀
Paula Bennett, goes the extra mile and licks John Keys arse
Paulas body guard thought there is no way I am standing in the front of that!
Paula reveals the most wanted abusers of the system…
The NZ Herald still denied any political alligence to any party, inspite of todays front page
Blonde behind Paula…”Yes well it is a false smile but you try sitting here when shes just farted!”
This acid is really strong. Keep forgetting whether I’m still pretending to be a westie or not.
bennett:..’after me now..!
..’the working-class can kiss our arse..we’ve got the bosses’ job at last.!’.
A new dartboard for New Zealanders
blond visitor from hawkes bay:
..’i can see her ladders from back here..
..and yep.!..they’ve been pulled-up her behind..!..’..
One little duck
Knock at the door
Legs 11
Two little ducks
Two and eight, in a state.
Danny La Rue
Tickety-boo….
Bingo!.
I did not have sex with this man.
‘lewinsky reverse!’
bennett:..
..’i’m holding up this picture of all these wankers..
..’cos i don’t want you to see the cocaine caked around my nostrils..’
blond visitor from hawkes bay:..
“..and i thought i was a right real-beetch…!”
…yeah….and I really suggest that you stop looking so pleased with yourselves Bennett & Kaye -…it isn’t clever to stand behind a dartboard like that….
Well, we proved we can’t be brighter but we’re still brighter than the electorate if we get in with this lot!
heh!
“Perception” that must be, as that is all that counts, for media and shallow minded, of whom there are a fair few.
Mr Invisible standing for nothing and nowhere in particular in the bottom right corner.
Lacoste and Gucci are my friends now, I hate you, you losers on my payroll! Go and get a life, as there are so many “jobs”, I know many “blow jobs” that can be done for good pay also.
“We wanted to make them into stamps, but people kept spitting on the wrong side.”
Teem(ing) Key Wee – all over your heads, it is called “trickle down theory”!
Teem Key Wee is a “winner”, I suppose, if you like “golden showers”.
“I’m so embarrassed! That nice Mr. Key said that he sacked Wilkinson and Heatley for “nothing”, yet he still keeps toxic buffoons like me, Hekia, Bridges, Collins, Tolley and Woodhouse around!”
Gastric bypass surgery patient misuses party promotional material to hide immense, all-consuming shame.
National re-invent Snakes and Ladders board game but forget to add the ladders.
lol like this one Tel 🙂
Look into my eyes, you are feeling sleepy.
On the count of three you will wake up and remember nothing.
These are not the drones you are looking for.
Rot in hell, you self righteous “Nazis”, you National Party demagogues, and that is what you are in a social and economic context, viva el pueblo, viva el Chile:
The CORRUPT Key and Pinera connection, to all the idiots here that do NOT get it yet, wake the damned well up, thanks out of your slumber:
https://www.google.co.nz/search?q=john+key+pinera&biw=1887&bih=939&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=t8WuU9OAB43MkAWE14HwBw&ved=0CB4QsAQ
What a cowardly disgrace has come about us??
Megalomaniac renames his political party.
Behold the best candidates in the land.
lol good joke 🙂
Which one is Colin Craig?
They look like real estate agents. Slimy
This is the design for the new food stamps
For sale, please send sealed tenders to cabinet club.