humour
Categories under humour
- caption contest (152)
- parody (32)
- Satire (281)
ImperatorFish: A statement from the Prime Minister
Written By: - Date published: 11:55 am, April 11th, 2013 - 2 comments
The Government Security (Doing As They Please) Bill will be introduced next week, and this important piece of legislation will make it clear that our security and law enforcement agencies must operate within the framework of doing anything they want.
Attack of the Knuckleheads
Written By: - Date published: 8:45 am, April 6th, 2013 - 97 comments
I wonder how far the knucklehead rebellion will spread…
ImperatorFish: Arrest of The Environment ends campaign of terror against businesses
Written By: - Date published: 11:57 am, April 4th, 2013 - 9 comments
ImperatorFish: DOC sheds 140 jobs, but new owner remains committed
Written By: - Date published: 12:50 pm, March 27th, 2013 - 9 comments
DOC’s new owners, Warner Bros, are reportedly concerned that too much emphasis has been placed on preserving uninteresting animals, like native parrots and snails. The restructure will see a renewed focus on wolf-breeding, resurrecting Haast’s Eagles and fire-breathing dragons.
ImperatorFish: David Shearer suspends rule-breaking Labour MP
Written By: - Date published: 8:02 am, March 19th, 2013 - 114 comments
Scott at Imperator Fish has kindly given us permission to syndicate posts from his blog – the original of this post is here.
ImperatorFish: Bennett announces drought relief get-tough measures
Written By: - Date published: 12:56 pm, March 7th, 2013 - 9 comments
Will farmers be required to take mandatory drug tests, show evidence of looking for alternate sources of income and have their drought relief money docked if they fail to answer phone calls from Work and Income?
ImperatorFish: Poor, sick, and unemployed looking forward to MRP share offer
Written By: - Date published: 11:42 am, March 6th, 2013 - 19 comments
John Armstrong may think that “the question now – as far as most people are concerned – is whether Mighty River Power shares will be a good investment,” but Scott’s been out there to find out what ‘most’ people really think…
Annoy Prosser and vote Muslim!
Written By: - Date published: 8:17 pm, March 4th, 2013 - 88 comments
After reading Queen of Thorns complaint about the limited gender options in the census, I was considering the census. For me and almost everyone else I know (apart from my brother and a few others) we are devotedly irreligious. But every census they ask us that same old rather meaningless question… Obviously voting Jedi didn’t work. However […]
Brilliant policy
Written By: - Date published: 1:27 pm, March 2nd, 2013 - 47 comments
I’ve got to stay that I stand in awe of this latest tax policy suggestion from the IRD. Simple, fair, easy to implement, it will be wildly popular. I think the Nats should adopt it at once.
John Key: High dollar works for me
Written By: - Date published: 10:43 am, February 28th, 2013 - 24 comments
As a Canadian currency dealer dubs the NZ$ the “new gold”, John Key sings the praises of a high dollar
Leaked: draft blueprint for future recruitment to ACC sensitive claims unit
Written By: - Date published: 7:00 pm, February 20th, 2013 - 10 comments
An accidentally-mis-addressed email from ACC’s HR department reveals much-needed changes are going to be made to their sensitive claims unit.
ImperatorFish: John Key’s Reshuffle Analysed
Written By: - Date published: 1:41 pm, January 23rd, 2013 - 7 comments
The biggest winner is Dr Nick Smith. He returns to Cabinet after his fall from grace last year, and is appointed as Minister for Creating a Perception of Crisis in Order to Justify Savage Cutbacks in Entitlements.
The biggest losers are Kate Wilkinson and Phil Heatley, who have been dropped from Cabinet altogether. Both have failed to perform, and their inability to communicate with the smoothness of someone like Hekia Parata will have counted against them.
Imperatorfish: The post I never posted
Written By: - Date published: 12:01 pm, January 9th, 2013 - 26 comments
… And even if I was wrong on that point, I went on to write, David Shearer was still not the best man for the job, because he had failed to demonstrate an ability to walk on water or bring the dead back to life. But I didn’t push the “publish” button, because I came up with an even better idea for a post…
It’s the market, baby
Written By: - Date published: 7:35 am, January 9th, 2013 - 319 comments
I went to the supermarket and said “I want your best meat for $9 a kg”. They said I could have pre-cooked sausages or the cheapest mince for that. But I wanted good meat! So I went to other supermarkets and butchers. Some wouldn’t sell me anything for that much, none would supply the quality I wanted. They say I’m mad. But, when this business does it, they’re the victims.
The enemy is still not your friend
Written By: - Date published: 10:37 am, December 8th, 2012 - 95 comments
It’s pretty clear: the Greens have managed to hold on to the massive gain they made during the last election campaign, largely at Labour’s expense as it imploded. Labour’s back to its pre-campaign level, at National’s expense. Lab+Green=Nat or thereabouts but the Left needs a good 5% more from the Right to feel confident. So, this is not the time to be listening to John Armstrong’s advice.
I’d almost agree with David on gender discrimination
Written By: - Date published: 3:02 pm, December 6th, 2012 - 38 comments
A partner in a Napier legal firm is boycotting the annual Law Society Christmas party because it is being held in a club that will not allow women as members. “Women had to fight to get the vote. I’m not prepared to let that part of our history go, I’m not prepared to take that for granted.”
An apology to David Cunliffe
Written By: - Date published: 6:00 pm, November 19th, 2012 - 121 comments
I’m sorry, David Cunliffe, for the part I have played in your downfall. Wait a minute, what?
Queen of Thorns makes a move for Labour leadership
Written By: - Date published: 12:00 pm, November 18th, 2012 - 15 comments
The truth is out. Under Patrick Gower’s incredibly cunning questioning, I have confessed that I will challenge Shearer in February.
A note to a media commentator
Written By: - Date published: 2:51 am, November 17th, 2012 - 53 comments
I finally got around to listening to Gavin Ellis making a complete dork of himself on Radio NZ talking about authors on this site being “manipulated”. Hah! Anyone trying to manipulate them is likely to wind up being made into a pretzel. I wouldn’t care to try it myself. So does Gavin Ellis = a bit of an idiot. Or more charitably, has he actually bothered to think about this issue?
Pagani to lead Labour to victory!
Written By: - Date published: 1:20 pm, November 14th, 2012 - 20 comments
In a bold and exciting move Labour MP David Shearer stood down at today’s Labour conference and handed the reins to mild mannered media commentator Josie Pagani. Shearer said it became clear he had too much parliamentary experience for the role and the public was calling for someone ‘less like a politician’ than he was.
ImperatorFish: A Statement From Hekia Parata
Written By: - Date published: 1:01 pm, November 14th, 2012 - 4 comments
A statement from Education Minister Hekia Parata to concerned parents, teachers and children in the Christchurch area.
ImperatorFish: In Praise Of John Key
Written By: - Date published: 9:49 pm, November 12th, 2012 - 8 comments
I am filled with admiration for our Prime Minister. The latest employment figures are a disaster, and appear to show that this government does not know how to grow the economy. But our Mr Key is made of sterner stuff. He knows in his heart that these figures aren’t to be relied upon, because everything else tells him that things are getting better.
Thanks DPF for my laugh of the day
Written By: - Date published: 11:18 am, November 12th, 2012 - 62 comments
DPF is peddling a conspiracy theory that The Standard is acting on instructions for a coordinated attack on Shearer. I can see how he’d make that mistake, being used to a command and control structure for his Nat blog – but here at The Standard we don’t take orders from anyone.
Recent Comments